“Yeah?”
What the hell was the point if she didn’t take a leap of faith? Or another one in the line of what felt like countless ones. “I don’t want to stay here tonight.” She could keep going, tell him that even the cathartic sobbing at the gazebo hadn’t been enough to banish the ache of missing her mom. “Being here makes it hard to do anything but dwell in the memories, both good and bad. I just…I’m not up to it right now.”
She braced herself for a glare or angry comment, but Luke only gave a short nod. “Let’s see what our options are.” That was it. He even took her hand as they made their way down to a corner with several cabs. He glanced at his watch. “It’s getting kind of late for a flight going out, but we can see if there are any night trains.”
“I’ve never been on a train.” And she could barely reconcile this man with the one she’d met back in Cork. It was more than his taking care of her—there was something relaxed in his face that hadn’t been there before. As if maybe he’d let go of some of the baggage weighing him down. She understood. It had hurt to lay the innermost part of herself out there, but she felt like she’d lanced an old wound. It would take time, but maybe she’d heal cleanly now.
Maybe his talking about his injury and potential future had done the same for him.
“Then here’s to new experiences.” He opened the cab door for her and followed her into the backseat. “Train station.”
The cab driver muttered a confirmation and the car lurched into motion, throwing her against him. He put his arm around her shoulders. “So where else is on your list?”
She was so distracted by the insane way the cabbie was tearing through the streets, it took her a few seconds to realize he’d asked her a question. “What?”
“Your path to enlightenment or whatever you’re calling it. Where else is on your list?”
This was so much easier to talk about that the relief made her feel wobbly. “There were a couple places I wanted to see just because I’m over here—Rome, Paris, Barcelona—but there’s only one place left on my list. Verona.”
He was silent for a few seconds. “Because…”
Right. She’d told him the reasons behind the other places. Alexis looked out the window, knowing that he could see her blush. “Juliet’s Wall is there. I know the whole Romeo and Juliet thing is more tragedy than romance, but the wall itself has become something more. People write the name of the ones they love, and legend has it that doing so makes the love stronger.” Her face was so hot, it was a wonder she didn’t set fire to her skin. “And I’m sure you’ve heard of the letters people write to their lost loves.”
“There was a movie a few years back.” When she shot him a look, he shrugged. “I didn’t see it, but Aunt Rose is a huge chick flick fan.”
“Oh.”
Luke sat back, his eyes intense despite his relaxed posture. “So you’re going to go write a letter to that piece of shit ex of yours.”
“What?” She burst out laughing. “God, no. Maybe I wasn’t clear before, but that wasn’t exactly an epic love worth writing home about.” Which is why she shouldn’t have been surprised by Eric’s reaction to her barrenness. They’d never shared half the connection she felt with Luke.
Dangerous territory, Alexis.
She looked back out the window, trying to ignore the tension in the cab and how the scenery was flying by at a truly terrifying rate. “No, it’s nothing like that. I might not have been head over heels in love with Eric, but how things fell out between us… It made me bitter. I want to let that go, and I want to open myself up to loving again.”
Though she was starting to think that she didn’t need a trip to Italy to accomplish that.
“Well, let’s see what the train station has to offer, and then we’ll see about getting you to Verona.” There was a warmth in his voice that she was rapidly becoming used to. She liked grouchy Luke despite herself. A Luke who was protective and empathetic?
She more than liked him.
Alexis shut that thought down real fast. “Sounds great.”
He pulled her back against him and tucked her against his side, his expression becoming what could only be described as mischievous. “And if you’re in the mood for more new experiences, I have something in mind.”
“Oh yeah?” She let herself relax against him, letting the feel of him uncoil the stress that had every muscle in her body strung tight. It felt so damn good to not have to be the strong one for once, better than she could have imagined.
He leaned down until his lips brushed her ear. She tensed, waiting for the inevitable outpouring of filthy suggestions that would get her so hot, he’d be lucky if she didn’t drag him into a bathroom at the train station. But he surprised her. “You’ll have to wait and see, darlin’.”
“I’m not really one for surprises.” Very few in her life had been good ones up to this point.
“That’s a crying shame, because you’re going to get one soon.” He squeezed her thigh, the heat of his hand soaking through her jeans and right to her center. The bastard knew it, too, because he grinned as he sat back. “A little waiting never killed anyone.” He was being downright playful.
“It might kill you.” She tried to fight a grin and failed.
He laughed, the sound surprising her just as much now as it did every time it came out of his mouth. It was so at odds with the personality he presented the rest of the world, so full of joy. It made her wonder yet again what kind of man he’d been before the injury to his knee. Had he been happy? Or just another variation of the grouch she first met? The puzzle pulled at Alexis, demanding she ask him the same probing questions he’d subjected her to.
But then she looked at his face, the grin that made her want to smile right back, the mischief lighting up his green eyes, and realized it didn’t matter. She wasn’t the same person she’d been before the cancer, and for the first time, she was really okay with that. She was stronger now, more in charge of her own life. It didn’t matter what Luke was before his injury, because it was part of the journey that had made him into the man he was today. That was all that mattered.
The cab screeched to a halt in front of the train station, and Luke paid before she had a chance to go for her wallet. “You don’t have to do that. I’m not exactly short on money.” One of the benefits of working as a nurse and basically being a shut-in the rest of the time was that her savings account wasn’t hurting in the least.
“It has nothing to do with what I have to do and everything to do with what I want to do.” He climbed out and held the door open for her. “You’re so damn strong, darlin’. Let me take care of you in this one little way.”
He kept staying that. She knew she was stronger than she used to be, but stronger didn’t mean strong. She hadn’t felt very strong a few hours ago when she was sobbing her heart out, but she wasn’t about to argue with him. “Just don’t get used to it.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.”
The train station was nearly deserted, but there were small groups here and there who seemed either to be waiting for a train or to have just gotten off one. She spotted a bathroom and touched his arm. “I’m going to change into something more comfortable.” If they were taking a night train, her jeans weren’t the best option for lounging.