It was only when Lily whined that Zack lifted his head, his lips a heartbeat from mine. “Thank you.” If I moved the slightest, I could kiss him. My mouth dry at the thought, I licked my lips and heard his breath hitch. We stood there, suspended in time, gazing into each other’s eyes. My arms were draped over his shoulders, his body heat scorching me. I wondered how soft his hair was, if I dared to slide my fingers under his cap or stroke the fine fuzz at the back of his neck. I knew if he brushed his lips across my skin, I’d melt. His stubble looked rough and scratchy. Delicious.
“Don’t you need to go, Holly Jacobs?” Even the way he murmured my name was sexy. This was crazy. Add that to my track record of bad decisions and getting involved with Zack was dumb on an epic level. I was incapable of having a no-strings fling. For me, it was all or nothing, and this time I was going to make the sane decision.
“Why don’t you call me just Holly?” Asking him another question was harmless.
I saw a flash of white teeth in the darkness. “I like your name.” He sounded amused. “Is that okay, Just-Holly?”
Dear God. In the middle of his grief and distress, he still had a sense of humor. I really needed to escape before I found any more reasons to linger. But I didn’t move an inch.
“You sure you don’t want to come back to my place?” His whisper reverberated through me, turning my spine liquid and my knees to jelly. He shifted position slightly and I felt him trailing a hand up my back, the fingertips tiptoeing with excruciating slowness and precision.
“Zack, I don’t do one-night stands.”
“I’m here for two nights.”
“I only met you an hour ago. I don’t know anything about you.”
“It’s only sex, Holly. Not a marriage proposal.” He sounded amused rather than offended.
Lily whined again from somewhere near my feet and jogged my attention. Right on cue, Jasper’s voice rang out. “That you, Hol?”
Zack stood so close, I felt his breath on my cheek. I had to reply to Jasper. My brain was having difficulty thinking about anything but the feel of the man in my arms.
“Your brother?”
“Yes.” I swallowed. “Yes, Jas, it’s me.” I tried to call out, but it emerged as a croak. Lily tugged on the lead, and I felt it go taut across my leg.
“You okay, sis?” I heard the concern in Jasper’s tone and I hurried to reassure him.
“Yes, I’ll be right in.” I didn’t move.
Zack brought his mouth to my ear. My stomach lurched. “Two nights, Holly. No encores.”
If I said yes, I’d regret it big-time in the morning. If I said no, I’d regret that, too. But some regrets were easier to bear than others. My mind was made up, but my body hadn’t gotten the message yet.
“You’re a beautiful woman, Holly Jacobs.” He lifted a hand and brushed his knuckles down my cheek, his gaze holding mine. The zing that went through me was like a static shock, and my resolve weakened. How would it feel with his hands on my face, fingers running through my hair, sliding down my body, caressing my thighs? I shook my head to dispel the unwanted images. There was a definite current flowing between us, dark and heated, and whispering of pleasure.
“It’s night,” I croaked. “You can’t see me.”
“I saw you on the beach.”
I wanted to protest, but I didn’t get the chance. Zack dropped his head, swept his mouth across mine, and all rational thought ceased.
It was just a fleeting brush of lips on lips, and then he paused, his eyes searching my face. Was he seeking permission? He looked torn. Confused. As though he expected one thing and found another entirely.
He murmured something under his breath, leaned into me, and turned up the heat. A scorching blast of hunger and need flooded through me, surfing on a rising tide of desire. Any doubts I’d held on to dissolved under the onslaught from his lips. I tasted alcohol on his breath, the vodka we’d shared, and when I let his tongue inside my mouth the flavor intensified. I’d been kissed before. I was no shrinking virgin, but I’d never been kissed like this, as though I was the only reason he drew breath.
His fingers dug into my hair, tilted my head, increased the pressure, and rocked my world some more. Shameless now, I gave myself permission to touch him, to slide my fingers across his nape and stroke the fine, downy hairs I found. I curled my other hand into the front of his T-shirt. If I didn’t cling to him, my shaking knees would give way, and I’d crumple to the floor.
The grip on my hair relaxed first. Then he raised his head and broke the connection. I leaned into him, but he moved back, his breath juddering. “That’s what you’re saying no to.”
What? I gazed at him in the darkness and tried to read his expression, but couldn’t.
“Sweet dreams, baby.” He shoved the dogs’ leads into my hand, ran his fingers through my hair, and then turned on his heel and strode off into the night.
Chapter Five
With Zack gone, the dogs went back to their usual behavior and hauled me up the steps and into the house, leaving my wits scattered on the ground. I remembered to bend down and release the girls from their leads and then watched, bemused, as they scampered into the kitchen for their drinking bowls.
I touched my kiss-swollen lips with a trembling finger. I didn’t know if I’d see him again. But I wanted to, so much that it scared me.
“Hol?”
I stood there in the hallway, chains dangling from one hand, still with my coat on. It was an effort to find a normal voice, but I tried. “Hang on. One minute.” It was a kiss, that’s all. If he kissed like that, what would he be like as a lover?
I was more turned on now, after one slightly alcoholic kiss, than I’d ever been before. I blinked, scrubbed a hand across my face, and went to see my brother.
Jasper sprawled in his armchair, plastered leg propped up and shiny crutches within grabbing distance. His hair was rumpled, his face unshaven, and he had massive blue shadows beneath his eyes, along with a worried frown that cleared when he saw me. I was such a bitch to him sometimes. He may be an annoying thorn in my side, but at least he was still here. I wasn’t going to his funeral tomorrow.
I crossed the room on rapid, stumbling footsteps and hugged him, careful not to bump into his leg. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have stormed off like that.”
He huffed out a laugh and wriggled free with practiced ease. “Hey. What’s got into you?”
I keep forgetting how close I came to losing you. I wiped a leaking tear from my eyes and smiled at his confusion. “Maybe I’m getting maudlin. I didn’t mean what I said earlier, you know.”
“About me screwing up your promotion?”
“Yup.”
“And dragging you back to this godforsaken backwater to look after me?”
“That too.”
“What about my reckless, flagrant disregard of basic road safety?”
A shiver ran down my spine at the thought. “Jas, why that road? Out of all the roads in New Zealand, why that one?” I swallowed past the lump that rose in my throat.
“Yeah.” His gaze shifted to the floor. “It was a dumb idea.” He glanced back up at me, his eyes dark and anxious. “It was something I had to do. Prove to myself that I could.”
I raised a trembling hand to my mouth as I looked at him. “Jas, our parents died on that road. You told me you’d never go there.” The memory of the phone call surfaced again. A tactful police officer giving me the number for the hospital. Next of kin. Car crash. The words had all tangled up inside my brain until I couldn’t be sure they were in a language I even spoke. My mad rush back to New Zealand, terrified I’d be the only surviving member of our dwindling family.
Other than a concussion and cuts and bruises, the only real damage was to his leg, although that was bad enough. His on-again-off-again girlfriend seemed to have disappeared, and he needed help. My help. I couldn’t refuse. And now for the next few weeks my life revolved around caring for the girls, feeding Jas, and making sure he had everything he needed while he was mostly immobile. After that, I’d be heading back to London.