"Good," my mentor grinned, showing every last one of his numerous pointed teeth. "Then we can beat them."
"How?"
If nothing else, I've gotten quite good at feeding Aahz straight lines.
"Easy. Just ask yourselves this: If you were a Deveel and paid the Mob to protect your business, and things started going wrong anyway, what would you do?"
"I can answer that one," Massha said. "I'd either demand better protection, scream for my money back, or both."
"I don't get it," I frowned. "What's going to happen to a Mob-protected business?"
"We are," Aahz grinned.
"What our strategist is trying to say," Chumly supplied, "is that the best defense is a good offense. Not terribly original, but effective nonetheless."
"You're darn right it's effective," my mentor exclaimed. "Instead of us defending against the Mob, we're going to start a crime wave right here at the Bazaar. Then let's see how good the Mob is at defending against us!"
Chapter Sixteen
"It's always easier to destroy than to create."
"HEY, Guido! How's it going?"
The big bodyguard spun around, scanning the crowd to see who had hailed him by name. When he saw me, his face brightened.
"Mister Skeeve!"
"Never expected to run into you here!" I lied.
From Gus's description, I had known that both Guido and his cousin Nunzio were part of the Mob's contingent at the Bazaar. This "chance meeting" was the result of nearly half a day's worth of searching and following rumors.
"What are you doing here?" he asked confidentially. "Shopping for a few little items to wow 'em with back at Possiltum?"
"Just taking a bit of a vacation. That new queen and I don't get along so well. I thought things might ease up if I disappeared for a while."
"Too bad. If you was shoppin', I could line you up with some 'special deals,' if you know what I mean."
"You guys are really moving in, then?" I marveled.
"How is it going? Any problems?"
"Naw," the bodyguard bragged, puffing out his chest. "You was right. These Deveels are like shopkeepers anywhere. Lean on 'em a little and they fall in line."
"Don't tell me you're handling this all by yourself! I mean I know you're good, but…"
"Are you kiddin'? I'm an executive now… well, at least a team leader. Both Nunzio and me have a dozen men to order around, courtesy of our 'extensive knowledge of the Bazaar.' Pretty good, huh?"
"You mean you're running the whole operation?"
"That's Shai-ster's job. Me and Nunzio report to him, but it's us gives the orders to the boys."
I looked around expectantly.
"Is your team around? I'd like to meet them."
"Naw. We worked this area a couple days ago. I'm on my way to meet 'em and give out today's assignments. We're going after the area by the livestock pens today."
"How about Nunzio's team?"
"They're about three hours west of here. You know, this is a really big place!"
I put on my most disappointed face.
"Too bad, I would have liked to have met some of the ones who do the real work."
"Tell ya' what," Guido exclaimed, "why don't you drop by Fat's Spaghetti Parlor sometimes? That's where we're all hanging out. If we're not there, they can tell you where we are."
"I'll do that. Well, don't work too hard… and be careful. These guys can be meaner than they look."
"Piece of cake," he laughed as he headed off.
I was still waving merrily at his retreating figure as the rest of my "gang" faded out of the crowd around me.
"Did you get all that?" I asked out of the corner of my mouth.
"Two teams, neither one in this area. Shai-ster's running the show and therefore holding the bag," Tananda recited. "This area is both clear and under protection."
"Fat's Spaghetti Parlor is their headquarters, which is where we can find Shai-ster," Chumly completed. "Anything else?"
"Yeah," Aahz grinned. "Skeeve has a standing invite to drop by, and when he does, they're ready to tell him which team is working what area that day. Nice work."
"Lucky," I admitted with no embarrassment. "Well, shall we start?"
"Right," Aahz nodded. "Just like we planned, Tananda and Chumly are a team. Gus, you're with me. Skeeve and Massha, you start here. We all move out in different directions and space our hits so there's no pattern. Okay?"
"One more thing," I added. "Keep an eye on your disguises. I'm not sure of the exact range I can hold that spell at. If your disguise starts to fade, change direction to parallel mine."
"We meet back at the Yellow Crescent Inn," Gus finished. "And all of you watch your backs. I don't stock that much first aid gear."
"Good thought," I said. "Okay. Enough talk. Let's scatter and start giving the Mob a headache."
The other two teams had melted into the crowd of shoppers before I had even turned to Massha.
"Well, anything catch your eye for us to have a go at?"
"You know. you're starting to sound a bit like that troll."
That sounded a bit more abrupt than was Massha's normal style. I studied her curiously.
"Something bothering you?"
"Just a little nervous, I guess," she admitted. "Has it occurred to you all this plan has a major flaw? That to implement it potentially means getting the entire Bazaar after us, as well as the Mob?"
"Yes, it has."
"Doesn't it scare you?"
"Yes, it does."
"Well, how do you handle it?"
"By thinking about it as little possible," I said flatly. "Look, apprentice, aside from doing shtick in court for the amusement of the masses, this profession of ours is pretty dangerous. If we start dwelling on everything that can go wrong in the future, we'll either never move or blunder headlong into the present because our minds aren't on what we're doing right now. I try to be aware of the potential danger of a situation, but I don't worry about trouble until it happens. It's a little shaky, but it's worked so far."
"If you say so," she sighed. "Oh, well, gear me up and let's get started."
With a pass of my mind, I altered her features. Instead of being a massive woman, she was now a massive man… sort of. I had been experimenting with color lately, so I made her purple with reddish sideburns that ran all the way down her arms to her knuckles. Add some claw-like horns at the points of the ears and rough-textured, leathery skin on the face and hands, and you had a being I wouldn't want to mess with.
"Interesting," Massha grimaced, surveying what she could see of herself. "Did you make this up yourself, or is there a nasty dimension I haven't visited yet?"
"My own creation," I admitted. "The reputation you're going to build I wouldn't wish on any dimension I know of. Call it a Hoozit from the dimension Hoo."
"Who?"
"You've got it."
She rolled her eyes in exasperation.
"Hot stuff, do me a favor and only teach me magik, okay? Keep your sense of humor for yourself. I've already got enough enemies."
"We still need a target," I said, slightly hurt.