“Your aunt…” I couldn’t find the right words to make this any easier for her. “Your aunt was also like me.” It was more than confessing an alternative lifestyle. I was also confessing that I had known Judy. I was a liar. But she needed to understand that I had never laid a finger on J.
“No.” Emma shook her head as she processed the information. “No.”
“Emma, please.” I grabbed her wrist, needing to feel her heartbeat under my fingertips. “I never touched her. Never! I promise you. I barely knew her.” She struggled to free herself from my grip. “I haven’t been with anyone else since I began seeing you.”
I knew I should let her go. She didn’t want me to touch her, and I didn’t deserve any comfort from her.
“You knew her this whole time? You have been lying to me this whole time?” she yelled.
“Emma, please. I didn’t know when I met you. I will tell you anything you want to know.” I was desperate, clinging to the hope that the truth would somehow set me free. Hoping that, when it was all said and done, I could start new. But I still couldn’t force myself to let go of her. I gripped her wrist tightly in my hand as I clung to my sanity. I searched her eyes for compassion, for a glimmer of hope that she wouldn’t think I was evil.
“I hate you.”
Her words were like a hot knife in my flesh. I had fucked up beyond repair, but I had done it for her. Everything was for her.
“Emma, please…” my voice shook.
“William!” she screamed in terror, and in that moment, the world slowed. I released her, finally able to break from her pull, but it was too late. There was no pain, just the deafening sound of metal crunching and twisting around us. In an instant, she was ripped from my heart, and my world went dark.
Chapter Fourteen
My head was throbbing as I awoke. I felt like I had been on a three-day bender. The light stung my eyes, and I had to squint to keep from making my head hurt worse. Small, delicate fingers squeezed my hand. I looked up at the beautiful brunette that stood over me. She looked like she had been through hell and back, and I imagined if she had been wherever I was, that was an accurate description.
A man cleared his throat, and I turned my head, wincing in pain at the sudden movement. “Where am I?” I asked him as he stood with clipboard in hand.
“Kippling Hospital,” the female spoke as she shoved her hands in her pockets and sucked her lower lip in between her teeth. She had a beautiful mouth, but she looked so fucking sad. I wanted to ask her if she was okay, but the doctor interrupted my thoughts as my eyes stayed locked on her mouth.
“Welcome back to the world.” His voice was loud and only caused the throbbing in my head to intensify. “Can you tell me your name?”
“William…Honor.” I groaned as I rubbed a hand over my head. Was I in rehab? Was this girl a junkie? Jesus Christ, what have I done now?
“Great. Can you tell me the last thing you remember?” The doctor broke through my thoughts, but I kept my eyes on the sad woman.
“Uh…yeah, sure…” I looked to the doctor and back to the woman. “I remember…” I glanced back to the doctor as I struggled to think. “Shit.” I pinched the bridge of my nose as I struggled to breathe through the stabbing pain in my head.
“It’s okay.” The doctor patted me on the shoulder. “You’ve been through a serious trauma. It may take a little while to come back to you. In the meantime, we will do our best to keep you comfortable.”
I squeezed my eyes closed. A serious trauma? “What happened?”
“You were in a car accident. You’re very lucky to be alive. You and Emma both.” I opened my eyes and looked at the young woman in front of me, scanning her for injuries. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I had hurt her. Her eyes searched mine. “I’ll give you two a minute.” The doctor left the room, and we fell in an uncomfortable silence. The woman, Emma, looked nervous as she pulled her hands from her pockets and began to wring them together.
“William,” she said quietly.
“Call me Will.” I struggled to sit up and pushed the button on the side of the bed to meet my back.
“Will…uh…do you remember me?” she asked as she raised her gaze to meet mine. I searched her face for any sign of familiarity, but there was none. It was like a black void in my brain. Her eyes filled with tears, and I knew we must know each other very well. My eyes danced over her petite frame, and I wondered if I had had her. She nodded in understanding as a lone tear spilled over and rolled down her cheek. She stood frozen as her eyes pleaded with me to remember. My chest ached as I watched her.
“Hey, don’t cry. Come here.” She slowly sat down beside me and broke down, sobbing. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against my chest, her breasts pushed against me. “Shhh.” The smell of flowers filled my nose, and I knew she was someone important to me, but my mind was a fog. Her fingers twisted in my gown, and she cried as I rubbed my hand up and down her back to soothe her. It was odd being the one in the hospital bed and comforting someone else. She seemed so weak, so fragile, and I wanted to protect her from whatever it was that was causing her so much pain.
“You said you would never forget me.” She pulled back slowly and placed her hand on my chest. I felt my heart rate speed up, and the machine next to my bed beeped at the increase. I pushed her tangled hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. She was so broken…so delicate.
The doctor returned with a nurse, and I forced myself to take my eyes off Emma. “Well, looks like you two have been getting reacquainted.” She looked down at her lap as she slid off the bed and leaned up against the wall. The nurse stepped between us and handed me a small cup of pills. I dumped them in my mouth as I watched the frightened woman against the wall. She was hurting, and I had the overwhelming urge to protect her, but I didn’t know where to begin if I couldn’t even remember how we had known each other.
The doctor began to speak, and I tried to focus on his instructions as the medicine slowly began to kick in, and the throbbing became a dull ache in the back of my mind.
“I don’t expect the memory loss to be long term. It is not uncommon for a head trauma such as the one you received. You’ll need to call me if the headaches worsen or if you have any problems with your vision.” He turned to look at Emma who was lost in her own thoughts and staring out at nothing. “I’m sure Ms. Townsend will be helping you to make the transition as smooth as possible. She will need to take it easy as well.”
The room fell silent as all eyes were on Emma. She looked up and shook her head in a daze. “I’m sorry?”
“You will be helping him with his transition at home, correct?”
She wiped a stray tear that clung to her bottom lashes and nodded her head in agreement. I couldn’t understand why, if we were so close, she seemed to hesitate at the idea of taking care of me. Not that I expected anyone to. I didn’t want to be a burden to anyone else.
“Good. All looks well, and we should be able to have you out of here in no time.”
“Thank you.”
The doctor smiled down at me before he and the nurse left the room, leaving me alone with Emma. I watched her as she looked around nervously before making her way over to a chair on the other side of my bed. She grabbed her purse, dug around in it, and pulled out a set of keys. She avoided looking at me, and her dark hair hung down, partially blocking my view of her face, but I could tell she was sad. And it seemed more about being around me than the accident we had together.