I pulled the door closed behind me, not bothering to lock it. I didn’t want her to be scared, and I had no idea how much she even knew.
“I heard we have a friend in common.”
“Several,” her voice was barely a whisper. I nodded, swallowing hard.
“I need to know what Abby told you.” My eyes met hers, and I knew she could see the threat behind them. J backed up a step before taking a seat on the edge of a small bed against the wall.
“She said she knew Emma and that she was in danger.”
“She threatened Emma?” The anger was boiling inside of me again.
“No. She said you were the danger.”
That felt like a blow to the stomach.
“J, I would never hurt Emma.”
“Like you would never hurt your ex-wife?” Her eyes darted to the door for a fraction of a second, but I caught it.
“Abby is as innocent as she seems.”
“She seems like a frail drug addict on the verge of death.”
“I don’t want Emma to get hurt. I would do anything to protect her.”
The look of concern left J, and the air in the room changed.
“Anything?” Her eyebrow cocked, and she pushed to her feet. I shook my head, wishing to fucking god this shit would end. I knew J was a bitch, but I never thought when push came to shove she would put herself above Emma.
“I am in love with Emma. All I want is to make sure she sees none of this.”
“That could be arranged.” She smirked, and I struggled to contain the anger that was boiling inside of me.
I crossed the room in two large strides, looming over her as I grabbed the hair in the back of her head. I yanked back forcefully, making her look me in the eye.
“You have no idea what you are asking from me. I’m giving you a chance to change your mind. Do the right thing, J.”
She swallowed hard, but her lips quirked in a smile.
“You don’t scare me, William.”
A slow grin spread across my face. “That is your first mistake.”
“Why her?” I could hear pain in her voice.
“It never would have been you.” I spat angrily as I released her hair and turned for the door. “Be home around seven tonight,” I called over my shoulder as I left the room. This place felt claustrophobic, no longer a retreat. I couldn’t get out of the building fast enough.
After I got in my car, I slammed my hands against the steering wheel angrily. I refused to do this to Emma. She didn’t deserve it. I needed to learn to walk away. I needed to cut all ties, but now it was too late. Too many people knew my secrets. Emma had no one. J didn’t give a fuck about her safety. She was jealous of her niece. How could I walk away now?
I had a few hours before J would be at her house waiting for me. Now I just needed a place to kill time. I couldn’t go back home or Emma would want to take me to meet her aunt. There was no way this could work out. I had very few options left. I could give J what she wanted, but where would it end? I could never look Emma in the eye if I did. I was far from a saint, but that would be the ultimate act of betrayal.
I pulled out my phone and dialed Stephen. He picked up on the first ring.
“This is over.” I squeezed my eyes closed, begging for my headache to fade.
“We want the same end game, William. I don’t want any more bloodshed to further our gain. I just want to know that I am safe.”
I nodded to myself. I knew J would not take to being threatened. She wanted one thing. I wasn’t willing to give it to her.
“She doesn’t know anything incriminating.” The crippling pain in my chest nearly cut off my words. I would be sacrificing my relationship with Emma by putting her above me. I knew I would regret it for the rest of my life, but for once, I needed to do what was right.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.” My feelings for Emma saved me, and they would be the very thing that destroyed me.
Stephen sighed loudly into the phone.
“I liked you better when you didn’t have a conscience.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at that. I liked it better too. Life was easier when I didn’t have to worry about someone else. I didn’t give a fuck about J, and if it weren’t for Emma, I wouldn’t care if she rotted in a gutter. I wished my problem was a sudden urge to care for others, but that wasn’t the case. It was only Emma. It would only ever be Emma.
I let the reality of the situation wash over me. It was out of my hands now. That was the best I could do for her. I knew without a doubt that I would not be able to stop myself from teaching J a lesson. I was not the type to give in to blackmail. It was almost painful to give up control of the situation, but I had to do it for Emma. Stephen was far from a killer, and I knew he would do anything to keep the blood from rising to his front door. I would let the cards fall where they may and hope that Emma and I could move past whatever she might discover.
Hours rolled on, and the sun sank in the sky, sending brilliant colors to stain the clouds. I watched as J left and drove off toward her home. I watched as others came and went from the club. I wanted more than anything to go home to Emma and tell her I loved her. I loved to see the look on her face as I said the words. It made me feel whole, worthy.
I sat in the darkened lot as the street light illuminated the road ahead and replayed the last few weeks of my life over and over in my head. My world was spiraling out of control.
I started my car and drove absentmindedly back to my place. I needed to spend one last night with Emma by my side. I needed to feel her warm skin against mine. Tomorrow was a mystery, and for once, I wasn’t going to try to force the hand of fate.
I opened the lock to my apartment as quietly as possible, but as the door swung open, Emma sat up on the couch, stretching like a cat. I couldn’t help but smile at her as her eyes met mine. I locked the door behind me and tossed the manila envelope from Stephen on the island. Emma stood and made her way around the couch. It was like an invisible magnetic field pulling us toward each other, and I took large strides to meet her.
I wrapped my arms around her waist and lifted her body against mine as I claimed her mouth. I needed to taste her, to be a part of her. She returned the kiss hungrily. I shifted toward the wall and pushed her back against it as her legs circled my waist. My fingers dug into her hips as she panted against my mouth. Her grip mimicked mine as she dug her nails into my shoulders. My lips trailed hungrily down her throat, unable to get enough of the taste of her flesh.
“Tell me you want me, Emma.” I needed to hear her say it—needed to feel the words vibrate in her throat as I continued my assault. My hips ground painfully hard against hers.
“Oh…I want you,” she moaned as she pushed back. I slid my fingers under the thin fabric of her shirt, palming the weight of her breast in my hand. For at least one more night, she was mine. Her back arched farther off the wall, and I knew I was being too rough, but I could not control myself any longer. I claimed her mouth with mine again, forcing my tongue past her lips. She willingly let me in, swirling her own tongue in response.
I reluctantly placed her back on the ground and struggled to unbuckle her jeans with shaking fingers. I slid them slowly over her hips as she reached for my belt. I gripped her wrists and pinned them to the wall above her head. She struggled to press herself against me but I took a step back, wanting to maintain the last bit of control I had. I kissed her cheek and took her earlobe between my teeth. Her body sagged, and I kept my grip firm on her hands.