His mate poked her head out from the tent where she’d been sitting. Taking her and Keenan camping had been his idea. Noor had tagged along. Oddly, of the two adults, it was Ashaya who was enjoying herself the most. Even the organizer only came out when she wanted to write about her experiences-in a journal she refused to let him read.
“Shh,” she said, “our son is having a nap with his girlfriend.” She took in his mud-splattered clothing. “Oh, dear.”
He muttered a few choice words. “Towel.” He’d dunked his entire body, clothes and all, in a nearby stream, washing off most of the mud, but he was soaking wet.
Making an expressive face at his tone, she grabbed a towel from one of the packs and came out. “Stop giving in to your mean side.” She began to dry his hair while he used the other end of the towel to wipe his face.
Dropping the towel the second it was done, he snaked out an arm and slammed her to his chest. “Put me in a better mood then.”
She rolled her eyes. “Fine. I’ll strip naked and lie in the sun once we get home and our son is out visiting his friends. Happy?”
He grinned, his bad mood disappearing at the speed of light. “Hell, yeah.”
Her lips twitched. Ashaya was still learning to laugh but he knew when his mate was happy. Leaning in, he stole a kiss. “What if I get naked and lie with you?”
Her lips parted. “Oh, then I’d definitely be ready to do you all sorts of favors.”
God, he loved the way she reacted to him. Bending his head, he stole another kiss before she pulled back and glanced down. “You made me wet.” Her nipples stood out hard and tight against the fabric of her T-shirt.
He felt like purring, he was so damn pleased with himself for having this sexy woman for his mate. “Maybe you’d better hang it up to dry.”
“One-track mind.”
“Thank you very much.”
Smile widening, she wiggled out of his arms. “Children, remember?”
“They sleep soundly.” He thought back to the previous night, to how she’d snuck out with him. The interlude had been a whole lot of fun.
It had also been a chance to talk. Ashaya’s guilt had been eating him alive. He’d finally loved her into exhaustion and told her to stop it. “We tried, Shaya. It didn’t work. I’m disappointed but I didn’t lose anything.”
“Your hopes,” she’d begun.
“I have you. I have Keenan. I’m happy.” It was the truth. Damn but she made him happy.
“You hurt,” she’d insisted.
“I did,” he’d acknowledged, because he couldn’t lie to her. “It hurt like a bitch when I realized the therapy wasn’t working, but then I got over it. I’m not the moping kind.”
Her face had softened. “No, you’re not. You just get out and find a way to deal.”
Looking at her now, he could tell that she still wasn’t feeling completely okay with the way things had turned out, but time would fix that. “Is there any coffee?” he asked as she grabbed clothes for him from inside the tent.
“I’ll make you some while you change.” She threw him a sweater and a fresh pair of jeans.
He was reaching out to grab the clothing when a spasm hit his body. It was so unexpected and violent that it doubled him over. His vision shifted, the world swimming before him. He was vaguely aware of Ashaya crying out and running to kneel beside him. Her frantic hands felt odd on him, not quite as they should. His senses were so acute, everything too sharp, too bright.
His first thought was that the gene therapy had gone terribly wrong. His second was that he had to let Ashaya know he didn’t blame her. It wasn’t her fault. Just fucking fate. But he couldn’t get the words out, his vocal cords all wrong. He couldn’t even reach for her. His hands wouldn’t cooperate.
“Give in!” he heard Ashaya scream. “Stop fighting it! Dorian, please!”
Give in? What was she talking about? He had to fight, fighting was how he’d survived.
“Baby, please. Please. Please.”
Ashaya never used endearments, a part of him thought. She was still learning. He liked to tease her by saying-A pulse of need, of love, came down the mating bond. It had the wet saltiness of a plea.
He couldn’t deny her. He could never deny her.
He gave in.
Agony and ecstasy, pure joy and shuddering pain. It was endless and the firefly flicker of a bird’s heart. Then it was over. He blinked but his vision remained all wrong, his eyes too low to the ground. He opened his mouth to ask Ashaya why she was crying… but what came out wasn’t human.
Ashaya began laughing at the look on Dorian’s face. “You are so beautiful.” A leopard with puzzled green eyes and the cutest expression she had ever seen. “Oh, I could just…” She reached out to stroke her hand down the fur of his back.
He made a rumbling sound that vibrated under her fingertips.
“Mom!” Keenan skidded to a stop beside her, Noor gasping beside him.
Dorian looked up and immediately lost his balance. Ashaya slung an arm around him, keeping him upright. “Slow, slow. You have to get used to it.”
Keenan bent his body, braced his hands on his knees, and looked sideways at the man he usually followed around like a solid little shadow. “Dorian? Is that you? You’re a leopard! Noor, look, Dorian’s a cat!”
Ashaya felt shock ripple through the mating bond as Keenan’s innocent exclamation finally cut through the confusion blinding Dorian. “You’re magnificent,” she whispered, cognizant of his keen hearing. “Amazingly beautiful.”
“Dorian’s a cat! Dorian’s a cat!” Keenan, her previously silent son, began running around them in circles, a giggling Noor attached to his hand.
Laughing at their antics, Ashaya pressed a kiss to Dorian’s brow. “Try to walk.”
He wobbled dangerously.
Shit! Dorian thought. He was like a cub, all lack of coordination and paws out of order. Okay, he thought, he was still a man inside. He could work this out.
Strokes on his back, through fur. The sensation was so different, so luscious. And then the whisper in his ear. “The leopard knows. You don’t have to cage him anymore.”
It was as if he’d just needed to hear it. The leopard took over, the man retreated. Then the two combined for the first time in his life. He felt Ashaya move away even as his body straightened. Turning his head, he leaned forward and closed his jaws very gently over her wrist.
It was a kiss.
Her face lit up in understanding. “I love you, too. Now go, run. Play.”
He released her, stopping to snap his teeth at the kids simply to hear them laugh and scamper off. Then he ran. The forest took on a thousand new colors clothed in scent, and when he chased prey, it was for the sheer joy of it. Hours passed. Night came and stars lit up the sky.
But the best part was going home… because she was waiting for him in front of a small fire. He walked out of the forest on four feet, thought about wanting to hold her in the arms of a man, and that quickly, he was kneeling naked on the forest floor. “Hey. Kids asleep?”
She nodded and ran to him. “Oh, Dorian!”
Her joy blazed along the bond until it pulsed golden inside his heart. “God, I love you,” he whispered. The words came from the heart of him, a heart that held the wild fury of a changeling-there was no man and there was no leopard. Only Dorian.
Nalini Singh
Nalini Singh was born in Fiji and raised in New Zealand. She also spent three years living and working in Japan. She has worked as a lawyer, a librarian, a candy factory general hand, a bank temp and an English teacher. Nalini currently lives in New Zealand.
