Charlie Rose came on. “Good morning. In just a moment we’ll be going to the James Brady Briefing Room at the White House, where the president will be making what we are told will be an extraordinary announcement. Nora O’Donnell, do you have any idea what this is about?”
“Charlie, I hope we’re going to hear that the Middle East negotiations have been successfully concluded. Wait, here we go.”
The White House press secretary stepped to the podium. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he said gravely, “the president.”
Then Will Lee entered from stage left, dressed casually in khaki trousers, an open-necked plaid shirt, and a blue blazer. “Sorry, wrong president,” he said, getting a big laugh. “Ladies and gentlemen, it falls to me to make an announcement never before heard at the White House. This morning, a little after five-thirty AM, the president of the United States gave birth to a son.”
The room was on its feet, clapping and cheering.
When the noise had died down Will continued. “He will be named, oddly enough, William Henry Lee the Fifth, continuing a tradition that began with my great-grandfather. He will be called, in the family, Will Henry, after his great-grandfather. In spite of being a few weeks premature, he weighed six pounds nine ounces.”
“Who delivered him?” someone in the front row asked.
“I’m afraid this was a very hurried process,” Will said. “I was awakened from a sound sleep a little late in the game by the president, who asked me to call the doctor. I had hardly finished the call when events took a sudden turn. Assisted by Secret Service Agent Frances Buchannan, who in a previous existence was a registered nurse, I called upon my experience in college, when during two summers I worked as an EMT, and I delivered the boy myself. By the time the doctor arrived, the process was essentially complete.”
More applause, cheering, and stomping.
Will got them quieted down. “Mother and child are resting comfortably, and now I must return to my duties as President Mom. More bulletins to come.”
Will left the podium to cheering, and a photograph of Kate and Will Henry was projected onto a large screen.
Stone found himself grinning and clapping.
Author’s note
I am happy to hear from readers, but you should know that if you write to me in care of my publisher, three to six months will pass before I receive your letter, and when it finally arrives it will be one among many, and I will not be able to reply.
However, if you have access to the Internet, you may visit my website at www.stuartwoods.com, where there is a button for sending me e-mail. So far, I have been able to reply to all my e-mail, and I will continue to try to do so.
If you send me an e-mail and do not receive a reply, it is probably because you are among an alarming number of people who have entered their e-mail address incorrectly in their mail software. I have many of my replies returned as undeliverable.
Remember: e-mail, reply; snail mail, no reply.
When you e-mail, please do not send attachments, as I never open these. They can take twenty minutes to download, and they often contain viruses.
Please do not place me on your mailing lists for funny stories, prayers, political causes, charitable fund-raising, petitions, or sentimental claptrap. I get enough of that from people I already know. Generally speaking, when I get e-mail addressed to a large number of people, I immediately delete it without reading it.
Please do not send me your ideas for a book, as I have a policy of writing only what I myself invent. If you send me story ideas, I will immediately delete them without reading them. If you have a good idea for a book, write it yourself, but I will not be able to advise you on how to get it published. Buy a copy of Writer’s Market at any bookstore; that will tell you how.
Anyone with a request concerning events or appearances may e-mail it to me or send it to: Publicity Department, Penguin Group (USA), 375 Hudson Street, New York, NY 10014.
Those ambitious folk who wish to buy film, dramatic, or television rights to my books should contact Matthew Snyder, Creative Artists Agency, 9830 Wilshire Boulevard, Beverly Hills, CA 98212-1825.
Those who wish to make offers for rights of a literary nature should contact Anne Sibbald, Janklow & Nesbit, 445 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10022. (Note: This is not an invitation for you to send her your manuscript or to solicit her to be your agent.)
If you want to know if I will be signing books in your city, please visit my website, www.stuartwoods.com, where the tour schedule will be published a month or so in advance. If you wish me to do a book signing in your locality, ask your favorite bookseller to contact his Penguin representative or the Penguin publicity department with the request.
If you find typographical or editorial errors in my book and feel an irresistible urge to tell someone, please write to Sara Minnich at Penguin’s address above. Do not e-mail your discoveries to me, as I will already have learned about them from others.
A list of my published works appears in the front of this book and on my website. All the novels are still in print in paperback and can be found at or ordered from any bookstore. If you wish to obtain hardcover copies of earlier novels or of the two nonfiction books, a good used-book store or one of the online bookstores can help you find them. Otherwise, you will have to go to a great many garage sales.