I nod, taking it from her as the school bus honks.
SEVEN
Willow’s End is too small to have its own school, so all the kids in town are bused to Denison, which is thirty minutes away. Even older teens with cars take the bus because it’s better than wasting gas. Climbing the three stairs, I smile at Mrs. Gunner like always. And then I face every kid in our entire town, my heart pounding as my eyes lock with Winn’s. The seat next to him is empty.
Gwen and Kat are right behind him, doing a horrible job of hiding their excitement. As I head over, I can’t deny that I’m pretty excited myself. This can’t be part of my life—not when the other part is so supremely strange—and yet it is. When I sit down, the bus goes silent save for the roaring engine. I can feel every single eye on us.
“Hey,” Winn says.
“Hi.” For a second I worry he’ll look at me like I’m crazy, but he only smiles wider. “How was plowing?”
“Good. We’ll be planting soon.” He takes my hand, and it makes everything a little more real. When I lean into him, I swear I can feel jealousy oozing off every girl in the bus. “You really should come for that. We need all the help we can get, and we usually have a big party after.”
“As long as I don’t have to—”
Gwen’s face appears between us. “Can we come, too?”
Winn laughs. “If you want.”
I roll my eyes, knowing too well why she wants to. Winn has older brothers—cute older brothers—who will definitely be home for planting, what with school ending in a few weeks. “Because you love farmwork,” I say.
It is a known fact that Gwendolyn Lee is the most unfarmy farm girl ever born. Even as a toddler, her parents couldn’t convince her dirt was a fun thing. She’s like a city girl without a city. It’s kind of adorable.
Gwen shrugs. “I love parties.”
“You mean you love hot boys working,” Kat says.
She laughs. “That, too! It’s everything I ever dreamed of.”
Winn shakes his head. “Wow, I had no idea my farm was that exciting.”
“Well, exciting is relative,” I say.
“Ouch.” He bumps my knee with his. “You’re not good for my ego, Jo.”
I roll my eyes. “You like it.”
He leans in to whisper. “I do.”
I can’t seem to stop smiling. I don’t care if I look like an idiot—Winn’s freaking holding my hand, and Nana isn’t cursing either of us for it! Finally. Then the pearl comes to mind, and for a second everything is horrible again. I put my hand over my jean pocket to make sure the little bead is still there. Nana would kill me if I lost it.
When we get off, Winn follows me to my locker, as if he’s part of the group now. I thought Kat and Gwen would disappear, but they seem to be enjoying this as much as I am.
“One rule,” Kat says as I gather my books.
I raise an eyebrow. “Rule?”
“Don’t make out in public. I will slap you both if you do.”
My face burns as I glance at Winn. “Can you be more awkward, Kat?”
She puts her hands up. “It’s only right to give warnings when violent punishment is involved.”
“Rule noted.” Winn rubs the back of his neck, and I kind of want to die. “We’re, uh, gonna go to art now.”
“Yes.” I grab his hand. “I don’t think I’ve ever been this excited for class.”
He laughs. “Me neither.”
The rest of the day goes like the bus ride, flitting between elation and dread. Eyes train on me at every turn, and this is not a day I want to draw attention to myself. I have a dark job to do, one that no one can see.
Soon enough, we’re all back on the bus, and Winn says, “You know, you’ve never been to my place.”
“I haven’t?” I know this very well, since I’ve daydreamed about it more than I will ever admit to him. “We should remedy that sometime.”
“Yes. I think you’d really like it. It has a magical quality to it.”
The word makes me bristle, even though he couldn’t possibly know. “Magical? Who says I like magic?”
“Who doesn’t? Okay, maybe I’m hyping it up a little so you’ll want to hang out with me this afternoon. We can do homework, and I can drive you home later.”
I pout. How I wish I could say yes.
He tilts his head. “You can’t?”
“I’m sorry. Nana wants to go bug catching, since it’s warm enough that they’re coming out. She likes to see how they mature over the summer.” Most people think Nana is a retired entomologist, which explains at least some of the strange behavior.
“Ah, okay. Just tell me when you can hang out, then.”
“Of course.”
The bus stops at Winn’s long dirt driveway before it gets to town, and he waves as he gets off. Gwen takes his spot. “I hate how adorable you guys are. You totally belong together, even if I’m kinda jealous.”
“It’s disgusting,” Kat says from behind.
“Seriously,” I say. “I disgust myself.”
They both laugh.
I get off at my usual spot, just two houses down from mine, but I don’t go home. I head for the only place where visitors stay overnight: Shirley’s Bed & Breakfast. Taking a deep breath, I pull the door open and find Mrs. Shirley perched behind a tall desk. I wave at her, making sure to give my best and most innocent smile.
“How can I help you, Josephine?” she asks.
“Has a man named Joseph Johnson been staying here, by any chance?”
Her eyebrows disappear behind her curly hair. “Why, yes! How did you know?”
I shrug. “Has he left?”
She flips open a book, which I assume is filled with visitor information. Her finger stops, and she reads the line for what seems like forever. “Looks like he paid for a couple days at first, but Mr. Shirley wrote down ‘indefinite’ yesterday.”
That makes me tremble. “Do you know where he might be?”
“I believe he’s here. Would you like me to get him?”
I nod. “But don’t say my name, please. It’s something I need to tell him.”
She gives me a funny look. “Okay, hon.”
As she walks off, I take slow, deep breaths to calm my heart. I grab the pendant around my neck, three circles that look a lot like a Venn diagram, telling myself I’m protected. The shadows won’t get me. Nana’s amulets are airtight.
My pep talk works until he comes down the stairs, his eyes locked on mine. Everywhere around him is darkness, as if he’s standing in a place void of light, and yet he smiles like nothing is wrong. I don’t know what to feel, pulled in by the fact that my father is right there and repulsed by the fear of what’s inside him. I wait for him to come to me.
“How did you know I was here?” he asks.
It takes me a moment to find my voice. “Only hotel in town.”
“Ah.” He points to the sitting room. “Can we talk here? You have no idea how much I want to speak with you.”
The darkness reaches for me, like black tentacles, and it’s all I can do not to scream. They creep forward, frantic with desire to have me. I take a few steps back. “How about we go for a walk?”
He glances at Mrs. Shirley, as if he thinks she’s the reason I don’t want to discuss things here. “That sounds great.”
“Okay.” I make for the door probably too quickly, but I want distance between those shadows and me. The amulet can only stand so much. There’s no sense letting them at me so soon. There’s still a lot to do, and I must save the magic I have stored since I can’t go to the house.
The afternoon is perfect, warm yet breezy. The world is in full spring mode, with tulips and daffodils and ranunculus decorating every flower bed. The cherry trees are pink and fluttery, and the willows are bright green with new leaves. The sun shines overhead. And still, it doesn’t penetrate the dark.