Chester shook his head again and sighed. “Lyle’s had a rough life,” he said. “You want some excitement? Read his file!”
“I think we’ve had enough excitement around here,” I said to Chester. “And I think we can be grateful for one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“That with everything that’s happened, no real harm has come to anyone.”
I looked up and saw Max coming toward us. On his right was Louise. On his left, Georgette.
“Right!” he blurted as he came to a halt before us. “Just came over to see how you were doing, Chester. Must have been pretty tough for you, behind bars.”
“I’ve been through tougher,” Chester replied with typical modesty.
“It was a nightmare,” Louise said dramatically. “I shall always forget my days and nights at the Chateau of Bow-Wow. How my heart it will ache when I am thinking of everything that has happened here. But, alors, in the end, everything is fine and we all live happily ever—oh, what is that word?”
“After?” Georgette offered.
Louise turned to Georgette and smiled sweetly. “Thank you, Camille.”
Georgette started to correct Louise, then stopped herself. “You’re welcome, sugar,” she said instead.
Max smiled. “These gals have become great friends,” he said happily. “Louise knows my heart belongs to her and her alone. And she knows that without Georgette, I never would have figured out how to break out of here and find her.”
Georgette blushed. “Thank goodness Dr. Greenbriar and Jill came along when they did and heard our barking. By the way,” she added, lowering her voice, “you can’t imagine what a dump that Harrison lives in.”
“Please!” Louise interjected. “I do not wish to be speaking of it. It was simply—” She pursed her lips as if searching for just the right word. “__abdominal!” she proclaimed at last.
Well, it was close to the right word.
“Jogging?” Max suggested. I started to crawl away.
“No joggin’, Max,” Georgette replied. “How about Rip-the-Rag?”
“I have gotten it!” Louise announced. “Let us play Knock-Each-Other-Down!”
“Good!” Max snorted. “You fellows want to join us?”
“Maybe another time,” Chester said. “Tennis elbow.”
“Harold?” Max asked, turning to me.
“Uh, no thanks,” I replied. “Coward cramps.”
“I’ll play,” Taxi said brightly.
“Right! Let’s go then.”
Chester and I watched as the four of them hurried off into the distance to play Knock-Each-Other-Down. Before they had gotten too far, Louise ran back and whispered in my ear.
“Barry’s been hitting the sauce again,” she uttered. “I didn’t want to tell you in front of the others. You have no idea what it’s doing to Marcia. She’s making a fool of herself over Ron. And all because of you, Todd.” Todd? “It’s no good, can’t you see? How many times do I have to tell you? No, no, don’t say anything. Just remember: when this nightmare is over, I’ll still have Mike. All you’ll have is a pocketful of memories and lint.” She sobbed and ran off to join the others.
I turned to Chester. “You know what I said before?”
“What’s that, Harold?”
“About no harm coming to anyone?”
“Mm-hmmm.”
“Forget it. I only hope there’s a cure for daytime television.”
Howard howled in the distance. “Kids are great!” he called out, with a wink in our direction.
“Harold?”
“Yes, Chester?”
“This place is a loony bin.”
“Yes, I know, Chester.”
“I want to go home, Harold. I don’t know how much more I can take of Lyle and Louise and Taxi and that crazy werewolf.”
“Wait a minute, Chester,” I said, “do you still believe Howard and Heather are werewolves? They’ve probably been acting strangely because they were nervous about having their babies.”
“Werewolves can’t get nervous about having babies?”
I had to admit the thought hadn’t occurred to me.
“Uh-uh,” he went on. “Nothing will convince me that they couldn’t be part dachshund and part werewolf. Stranger things have happened.” Howard let out another howl. “Besides, just listen to that. If that isn’t the call of a werewolf, nothing is. No, I just want to get out of here. That’s all I care about. Get me home, where I’ll never have to listen to that terrible sound again.”
I was about to answer him when the gate flew open and Toby and Pete bounded into Chateau Bow-Wow. As soon as he saw me, Toby came running in my direction.
“Harold!” he cried, throwing his arms around my neck. Boy, was I happy to see him! I started drooling like crazy.
“Chester!” Toby squealed, as he swooped the cat up off the ground and hugged him. Chester showed how overjoyed he was by not having a fit.
“Hey, guys,” Pete said coolly.
“Boy, did we have a neat vacation,” Toby said excitedly. “Wait’ll I tell you about it.”
“Yeah,” Pete joined in. “Dad lost our travelers’ checks and everything. Just like on TV.”
“Yeah, and then we had a flat tire, and Dad had forgotten to put the spare back in the car before we left home, so we had to sit in the rain until the tow truck came.”
“And then we were on this picnic and Dad fell out of the tree and now he’s wearing this cast, see—”
“Yeah, and it’s real neat, Harold. I wrote my name on it and everything.”
“Me, too!”
“Anyway,” Toby said, “sorry you had to be stuck here the whole time. I’ll bet it was real dull.”
Chester and I exchanged knowing glances.
“But now we’re going home, boy. Come on, let’s get your things.”
What things? I wondered. I didn’t remember having packed a toothbrush.
“Wait a minute,” Pete said, “let’s go ask Dad about you-know-what first.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot,” Toby replied, dropping Chester to the ground. “We’ll be back, you guys. Oh, here, Harold, here’s a chocolate cupcake I brought for you. With cream in the center.” And off they ran. The cupcake was a little smushed, which made sense since Toby had been carrying it in his back pocket. But it tasted delicious, especially after seven days of chocolate deprivation. That Toby was really a good kid.
A few minutes later, Dr. Greenbriar and Jill came out of the office door. I felt the blood pumping through my veins as they approached.
“I think the judge handled it very well,” Dr. Greenbriar was saying, “don’t you?”
“Mm-hmm,” Jill replied. “It might set Harrison straight after all. Even if he doesn’t continue, a year of college can’t hurt anybody.”
“Pretty smart sentence, all right,” the doctor said, smiling. “But what I liked best was the job he came up with for Harrison. To pay for school.”
Jill smiled now, too. “Yes. Working at the zoo. I think that should suit Harrison just fine.”
They laughed at the thought. I didn’t think it was so funny. What if he tried to steal an elephant?
“Well, you boys are going home,” Jill said, leaning toward us. “You must be glad about that, aren’t you?”
“Bet your boots, sweetheart,” Chester uttered under his breath.
We walked toward the gate, and we never looked back. We were going home at last.
MR. MONROE stood by the end of the station wagon, waving his good arm in our direction.
“Hey, Harold! How ya doin’, Chester?” he called out.
Mrs. Monroe cooed her greetings, and then Pete and Toby came running over to us. I noticed that Toby was carrying something small in his arms.
“Harold! Chester! Wait’ll you see the surprise we have for you,” he sang out. I looked up and saw that he was carrying a little brown puppy. Chester’s eyes went berserk. “Guess what!” Toby continued. “There were puppies born here a few days ago and one of them was the … uh … what’d ya callit …”