Qaiser frowned. “You know we’re shorthanded as is, what with Mary Vaughan having left.”
Cornelius nodded but didn’t say anything.
“I have to ask,” said Qaiser. “This is a genetics department, after all. There are lots of things here that potentially could have made you sick, and…well, I have to worry about the health of the students and the faculty. Is your problem related to any chemicals or specimens you encountered here?”
Cornelius shook his head again. “No. No, it’s nothing like that.” He took a deep breath. “But I can’t stay here any longer.”
“Why not?”
“Because…” A few weeks ago, he’d have been unable to discuss this topic without getting apoplectic, but now…
He shrugged a bit.
“Because you’ve won.”
Qaiser’s eyebrows pulled together. “Pardon?”
“You’ve won. The system here—it’s won. It’s beaten me.”
“What system?”
“Oh, come on! The hiring system, the promotion system, the tenure system. There’s no place for a white man.”
Qaiser apparently couldn’t meet his eyes. “It’s been a difficult issue for the university,” said Qaiser. “For all universities. But you know, despite the presence of me and a few others, the genetics department is still way below the university’s guidelines in terms of number of tenure-stream positions held by women.”
“You’re supposed to have forty percent,” said Cornelius.
“Right, and we’re nowhere near that—not yet.” Qaiser’s voice took on a defensive note. “But, look, even so, it should be half, and—”
“Half,” repeated Cornelius; he said it so calmly it surprised him, and apparently surprised Qaiser, too, since she immediately stopped talking. “Even when only twenty percent of the applicants are female?”
“Well, all right, then—but, anyway, the target isn’t half. It’s just forty percent.”
“How many tenured or tenure-track positions are there in this department?”
“Fifteen.”
“And how many are held by females?”
“Currently? Counting Mary?”
“Of course counting Mary.”
“Three.”
Cornelius nodded. He’d gotten back at two of them; the third was in a wheelchair, and Cornelius hadn’t been able to bring himself to…
“So the next three tenure-track openings have to go to women, don’t they?” he said.
“Well, yes. Assuming they’re qualified.”
Cornelius surprised himself; those last three words would have set him off before. But now…
“And if Mary’s leave turns out to be permanent,” he said, his tone still even, “as it probably will, you’ll have to replace her with a woman, too, right?”
Qaiser nodded, but she still wasn’t meeting his eyes.
“So the next four tenure-track appointments have to go to women.” He stopped himself—rather more easily than he’d expected to be able to do so—before adding, “Preferably crippled black ones.”
Qaiser nodded again.
“How often does a tenure-track position open up?” he asked, as if he himself didn’t already know the answer.
“It depends on when people retire, or move on to other things.”
Cornelius waited, saying nothing.
“Every couple of years or so,” Qaiser finally replied.
“More like three years, on average,” said Cornelius. “Trust me; I’ve done the math. Meaning it’ll be twelve years before you’re looking for a male, and even then it’ll be a disabled or minority male, isn’t that right?”
“Well…”
“Isn’t that right?”
But there was no need for Qaiser to reply; Cornelius had read the relevant part of the collective agreement between the Faculty Association and the Board of Governors so often he could recite it from memory, despite the awkward bureaucratic phrasing:
(i) In units where fewer than 40% of the tenure stream faculty/librarian positions are filled by women, when candidates’ qualifications are substantially equal the candidate who is a member of a visible/racial minority, an aboriginal person or a person with a disability and female shall be recommended for appointment.
(ii) If there is no candidate recommended from (i) above then when candidates’ qualifications are substantially equal a candidate who is female or who is a male and a member of a visible/racial minority, an aboriginal person, or a person with a disability shall be recommended for appointment.
If there is no candidate recommended from (i) or (ii) above then the candidate who is male shall be recommended for appointment.
“Cornelius, I’m sorry,” said Qaiser, at last.
“Everybody is in line in front of an able-bodied white male.”
“It’s only because…”
Qaiser trailed off, and Cornelius fixed her with a steady gaze. “Yes?” he said.
She actually squirmed a bit. “It’s only because able-bodied white males cut to the front of the line so often in the past.”
Cornelius remembered the last time someone had said that to him—a bleeding-heart liberal white guy at a party, last spring. He’d jumped down the guy’s throat, and practically tore out his lungs, saying he shouldn’t be punished for the actions of his ancestors, and just…
He realized it now.
Just basically making an ass of himself. He’d left the party in a huff.
“Perhaps you’re right,” said Cornelius. “In any event, what’s that old prayer? ‘God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.’ ” He paused. “In this case, I do know the difference.”
“I’m sorry, Cornelius,” said Qaiser.
“And so, I should leave.” Take my balls and go home, he thought—but, of course, he couldn’t do that anymore.
“Most universities have similar affirmative-action programs, you know. Where would you go?”
“Private industry, maybe. I love to teach, but…”
Qaiser nodded. “Biotech is superhot, right now. Lots of job openings, and…”
“And since biotech is mostly an industry of start-ups, no historical imbalances to correct,” said Cornelius, his tone even.
“Say,” said Qaiser, “you know what you should do? Go to the Synergy Group!”
“What’s that?”
“It’s the U.S.-government think tank devoted to Neanderthal studies. They’re the group that hired Mary Vaughan away.”
Cornelius was about to dismiss the notion—working with Mary now would be as difficult as working with Qaiser—but Qaiser continued: “I heard they offered Mary a hundred and fifty grand U.S.”
Cornelius felt his jaw dropping. That was—Christ, that was close to a quarter of a million dollars a year Canadian. It was indeed the kind of money a guy like him, with a Ph.D. from Oxford, should be pulling down!
Still…“I don’t want to muscle in on Mary’s turf,” he said.
“Oh, you wouldn’t be doing that,” said Qaiser. “In fact, I hear she’s left Synergy. Daria Klein had an e-mail from her a while ago. She’s apparently gone native—moved permanently over to the Neanderthal world.”
“Permanently?”
Qaiser nodded. “That’s what I heard.”
Cornelius frowned. “I suppose it couldn’t hurt to apply there, then…”
“Absolutely!” said Qaiser, apparently eager to do something for Cornelius. “Look, let me write you a letter of reference. I bet they’ll need another DNA expert there to replace Mary. Your graduate work was at Oxford’s Ancient Biomolecules Centre, right? You’d be a perfect fit.”
Cornelius considered. He’d done what he’d done in the first place because of frustration over his stalled career. It would be a nice bit of closure to have that ultimately lead to him getting the kind of job he deserved. “Thank you, Qaiser,” he said, smiling at her. “Thank you very much.”