‘What makes you think that?’
The priest shrugged. ‘Everything and nothing. Details, words. But since the second bomb I’ve been sure it’s him.’
After her initial shock, Vivien had regained her self-control, revived by an unnatural rush of adrenaline. She realized the importance of what Father McKean had just told her. At the same time, she knew what kind of inner battle he had won and lost in order to be able to say it.
‘Do you mind going from the beginning?’
Father McKean nodded, and waited. Now that it was out in the open he knew that Vivien would know what to ask and the right way to ask it.
‘How many times have you seen him?’
‘Once.’
‘When was that?’
‘Sunday morning, the day after the first bomb.’
‘What did he say?’
‘He confessed what he had done. And he told me what he intended to do in the future.’
‘How? Do you remember his exact words?’
‘As if I could forget. He said that the first time he had reunited light and dark. The next time he would reunite water and earth.’
He left her time to think. Then he arrived at the conclusion for her.
‘And that’s how it was. The first explosion happened at dusk, when the light and the dark are reunited. The second took place on the shores of the river. In that way the earth and water became one and the same. Do you know what that means?’
‘It means he’s working his way through Genesis, only destroying instead of creating.’
‘Precisely.’
‘Did he tell you why he’s doing it?’
Father McKean sat down on a stool, as if his strength was starting to desert him. ‘I asked him that question, using almost the same words.’
‘And what did he reply?’
‘He replied “I am God”.’
That phrase, repeated in a low voice for the first time outside the confessional, gave both of them a sharp sense of the madness.
Father McKean recalled his studies of psychology. ‘This man, whoever he is, is much more than just a serial killer or a mass murderer. He combines both pathologies. And what he presents of both pathologies is the rage and the total lack of discrimination.’
Vivien found herself thinking that, if they caught this man, there would be psychiatrists ready to pay money just to study him. And many people who would pay to be able to kill him with their bare hands.
‘Can you describe him?’ she asked.
‘Brown hair, young, tall, I think. A soft voice, but calm, and cold as ice.’
‘Anything else?’
‘If it’s any use, I had the impression he was wearing a green military-style jacket. But clothes don’t mean much.’
On the contrary, they mean everything.
Vivien felt excitement roll over her like a wave, and her lungs swelled as if she had breathed pure helium.
So Judith, who didn’t give tips, had been right. She blessed her, vowing to herself that she would have that coffee and listen to her complaints about every single ailment. She crouched in front of Father McKean, who was looking desolately at the floor, and placed her hands on his knees. At that moment it didn’t seem like excessive familiarity, only a mark of solidarity.
‘Michael, it would take too long to explain how I know, but it’s him. You were right. It’s him.’
This time the incredulous question came from the priest, uncertain if he should yield to his own relief. ‘Are you sure?’
Vivien sprang to her feet. ‘One hundred per cent.’
She paced a little up and down the room, thinking at a speed she did not believe herself capable of. Then she came to a halt, but that desperate search for a solution continued.
‘Did he tell you he’d be back?’
‘I fear he will.’
A thousand thoughts were crowding into her head, a thousand images turning around in rapid succession.
It was finally clear to her what she would do.
‘Michael, if it became known that you had betrayed the secret of the confessional, what would the consequences be for you?’
Father McKean stood up, looking like a man who feels his own soul sinking. ‘I’d be excommunicated. Permanently barred from the ministry.’
‘It won’t happen. Because nobody will know.’
Vivien explained how she intended to proceed. As she did so, she was thinking of the man who was with her in that white room and what was best for Joy and what was being done there every day for young people like Sundance.
‘I can’t put a bug in the confessional. I’d have to explain too many things. But there’s something you could do.’
‘What?’
‘If the man comes back, call me on my cellphone. Leave it on between you, so that I can hear your conversation. That way I’ll be the only one to hear him, and I’ll be able to control the operation and make sure that he’s arrested away from the church.’
Michael McKean, a priest who had lost every certainty, saw hope shining on the horizon. ‘But when you’ve caught him, the man will tell it all.’
‘And who’ll believe him if you and I deny it all? I have another witness who saw a guy in a green jacket somewhere else. He can take all the credit for himself. You’d come out completely clean.’
Father McKean remained silent, examining the proposal as if Vivien were standing there holding out an apple to him. ‘I don’t know, Vivien. I don’t know anything any more.’
Vivien put her hands on his arms and squeezed them. ‘Michael, I’m hardly the right person to preach to you. I don’t go to church very much and I’m not a very fervent worshipper. But one thing I’m sure of. The Christ who died on the cross to save the whole world would surely be able to forgive you for saving the lives of many people.’
‘All right. I’ll do it.’
Vivien felt overcome with gratitude and liberation and had to force herself not to embrace Father McKean.
As for the priest, he had never felt so close to mankind as at that moment when he believed that his soul had strayed from God.
‘How about going out in the garden?’ Vivien suggested. ‘I really want to see my niece right now.’
‘The kids are just going to lunch. Will you stay with us?’