We eat in silence for a minute. Then Maurice clears his throat and says, “How was everyone’s day today?”
Nobody speaks. I'm afraid to say anything. As much as I wanted to share my good news, I can’t. It's too soon and will only make my mom angrier.
“That good, huh?” he jokes. “Well, mine was fine. I had to go in to work for a couple hours to fix the computers but at least they are up and running for Monday. Otherwise it would have been a disaster.”
“I could imagine,” Mom says quietly, staring down at her food.
“How about you, Adrienne?” he says, turning to me.
I freeze in place with my fork halfway to my mouth. I steal a glance at my mom, who is still staring down at her food. I suppose I have no choice but to answer, regardless of the response. “Um, well, Lyndsay and I went out to Hidden Treasures and then did some shopping.”
“Hidden Treasures?”
“It’s an arts and crafts commission shop in Richmond.”
“Huh, haven’t heard of it. Did you buy anything nice?”
Here goes nothing. “I wasn’t there to buy.”
“Oh. What were you doing there then?”
“I was there to sell.” I carefully place my forkful of broccoli in my mouth.
This is when my mom chooses to speak. “Sell what?”
“Purses and wallets.”
She sets down her knife and fork, then carefully dabs her mouth with a napkin. “Are you telling me…that you spent the summer making purses…and wallets?” She nearly chokes out the last part.
I flinch, but calmly reply, “Yes…and pillows.”
Kaitlin turns to me with wide eyes. “You made my pillows?” she asks in awe. I nod. She looks like she wants to smile but she doesn’t.
“Well then,” Mom says, throwing her napkin down on her plate, “it’s nice to see you’re not wasting your life away.”
“Joy,” Maurice says gently, touching her hand.
She shakes her head and stands up, hands on either side of her plate. “No, Maurice, I can’t sit here and listen to this.” She looks at me. “Adrienne, I cannot express my outrage at your immaturity. Purses? Pillows? You can’t make a career out of that! You can’t live off the income from that! There is no way you can justify this choice.” She points a finger at me. “Let me tell you something: You're going to find out real fast what the real world is if you keep this up. You had the perfect career right in front of you that we have had planned out since you were little and you’re going to give it up to be some sort of ‘designer.’” She makes quotes with her fingers.
At this, I shove my chair back and stand up. “We planned out? No, you planned this out. You have spent my whole life molding me into a miniature you, and why? Because of tradition and the honor that goes with it. But you know what? You never once, for even a second, took the time to ask me what I wanted to do, or paid attention to the things I liked to do.” I think, Like when I used to sew, or when I fix the seams that come apart on your clothes. “You just kept shoving it down my throat and never allowed me to think for myself. I spent all my life thinking like you, believing that nursing was what I wanted. Now that I’m making my own choices, I can see what I want.”
“What?” she spits out. “Making minimum-wage sewing for a living?”
I shake my head and flare my nostrils. “No…to do what I want to do and not live in the shadow of a woman who cares more about tradition than her own daughter.” With that, I run upstairs to my room and close the door.
Half an hour later, there's a knock at my door. I sigh and say, “Who is it?”
“Kaitlin.”
Relieved, I sit up and tell her, “Come in.” She cautiously opens the door and closes it behind her. She stands there for a few seconds. I pat the bed and she sits down. “What’s up?”
She glances at the door, then back at me. “I wanted to thank you for making the pillows for me. Nobody has ever done anything like that for me before.”
I smile. “You’re welcome.”
“They’re so beautiful.” She looks down and touches her fingers together. “I think…I think if you can make something that cool, you can do anything.”
There I have it, a good thing that has come out of all this mess.
Kaitlin likes me.
I grin and say, “Thanks for the vote of confidence. I’m happy to have one person who believes in me.”
“I’m sorry you and your mom are fighting.”
I sigh. “Me too.” I hold up a hand and brush it off. “It will all blow over soon.” Fat chance, but I don’t tell her this. “We should just take our minds off of this and watch another episode. What do you say?”
She nods enthusiastically. “That sounds great.”
Maurice knocks on my door while Kaitlin and I are still watching our show. He asks me to step outside for a second, so I do. He says, “Your mom and I decided when we got married that we wouldn’t interfere when it came to parenting our stepdaughters. I wanted to let you know that I am still standing by that. However...” He pauses. “I know that this isn’t something that will just disappear tomorrow. In the meantime, I think it would be best if we don’t discuss upsetting things at the dinner table anymore.”
“I think you’re right.” My mom and I aren't going to find a middle ground overnight. It's going to take some time, if it even happens at all.
It's at that moment that it hits me.
I know of somebody who could offer insight into the mind of my mom. Someone who lived with her for years. Someone who argued with her. Not only that, but someone who can still manage to get along with her despite their differences.
My dad.
Half an hour later, I call him up. Just when I am expecting to leave a voicemail, he answers. “Adrienne! I'm so happy to hear from you.”
“Hey, Dad. How are you doing?”
“I'm doing all right. The hospital is keeping me busy. How about you? Getting excited to start classes in the fall?”
He makes the segue into the main reason why I was calling easier. “Well…” I start. “Actually, I’m taking a semester off.”
“You are?”
“Yeah. I decided I’m not going to be a nurse.”
There is a long pause on his end where I can only hear light breathing. “Does your mom know?”
I close my eyes. “Yes.”
“Ah…I can only begin to imagine how that went.”
“It hasn’t been good.” I tell him about everything that happened, from that first day of skipping the volunteer work up until now. “That’s why I called. I don’t know how to fix this and I want to understand how you guys have been able to get along, despite all the problems.”
“It didn’t happen overnight.” I can hear a hint of a reflective smile in his voice. “Your mother and I had our difficulties over the years, yes, but the thing that held us together was you. We both wanted what was best for you. When the divorce happened, we knew that although we had trouble getting along, we weren’t going to drag you into it. There was a truce set in place to be civil around you. I like to think that she and I get along partly because we still care about each other even though we aren’t in love anymore.” He lets out a breath. “She can be quite inflexible when it comes to certain things though.”
“That's the problem.”
“The way I see it, you only went along with it because you thought it would please her. She kept it going because she thought it was what you wanted too. At this point, you have both come to the opposite realization. Right now, her guard is up and precious little will get through to her until she softens. Talking to her will not do you any good until then. Once she does, then you need to talk to her seriously. Sit down with her and tell her you need to talk about something and you want her undivided attention.”