Adaline stood up quickly and headed back out toward the living room. “Like last night, Emmit. Did you fuck, Cookie?”
I let out a fake laugh as I shook my head. She was actually pissed off. Well fuck this shit. Who in the hell was she to get pissed at me? She turned me down.
“I almost did. Something about the woman you loved more than life itself showing up and acting like she has survived just fine since she ripped your heart out, well hell, it kind of fucked me up all over again.”
Adaline’s eyes turned dark as she placed her hands on her hips and narrowed her left eye at me. “Survived just fine? Really, that’s what you think, Emmit? That I survived just fine?”
With a smirk, I said, “Well you sure didn’t try and make things work, Adaline. You walked away like what we had meant nothing to you.” Not sure if it was anger or hurt that moved across her face, but whatever it was, it caused tears to build in her eyes. Turning her back toward me, she spun back around and walked up to me as she poked me in the chest.
“I was confused, Emmit. I wanted the life I had dreamed of too. I couldn’t have that life while you followed your dreams. I didn’t want to make you think you had to give up your dream for me to follow mine! If we had stayed together, I knew you would start feeling guilty and you would have come after me, Emmit.”
I took in a calming breath as I looked into her eyes before I started talking. “We could have made it work, you weren’t willing to try, Adaline.”
A single tear fell from Adaline’s eye as her shoulders sagged and she let out a defeated breath. “You’re so wrong, Emmit. I walked away from us because I loved you that much. Do you remember when I went to camp the summer of our senior year? I was gone for two months. You couldn’t stand the time apart, and you gave up two months of racing and came to camp. Do you remember that?”
“That was a few fucking dirt track races, Adaline. This is NASCAR. My dream. I would have figured out a way to see you and keep doing what I loved doing. Don’t blame this on me; you’re the one who doesn’t want this life.”
“I didn’t say that, Emmit!” Adaline screamed out. “I said I wanted time to follow my dreams. Traveling ten months out of the year, I would have never been able to go to college and get my degree. I did what I thought was right. It seems to me though you weren’t that heartbroken if you started bringing whores to your bed every night.”
With a toss of my head back, I laughed. “Oh please. Like you didn’t ever date or fuck other guys, Adaline. I’m not stupid.”
Placing her hand over her stomach, Adaline took a step back as she pressed her lips tightly together. Grabbing her stuff, she headed for the door. She turned and looked at me. “I dated a few guys, but none of them were you. I haven’t been with anyone since the last night we spent together. I couldn’t because I was still in love with you. I guess I’m the fool in this situation.” Closing her eyes, she let out a quick laugh. When she opened her eyes, she glared at me. “That is one situation I intend on fixing right away.”
All the air left my lungs as I grabbed onto the counter top to keep from falling over. I slammed my hand over my face and dragged it down. What in the hell? Adaline hadn’t been with another guy. Holy fuck did I mess up. I quickly made my way after her.
I stepped out between the buses and glanced both ways. My heart stopped the moment I saw Adaline talking to Malcolm. He looked over her shoulder directly at me as he smirked.
Malcolm looked back at Adaline and nodded as he put his arm around her and led her back to his bus.
I was frozen in place. Opening the door to his bus, Adaline walked into it while Malcolm turned and gave me a smile that would forever be etched in my memory.
The door to his bus shut as I stood there like an idiot and watched the door for Adaline to come back out. I felt numb as I walked back to my bus before I stopped walking.
“Fuck that.”
I started running over to Malcolm’s bus. Pulling the door open, I stumbled inside the bus only to find Adaline talking on the phone. Her eyes widened as she looked at me with her mouth gaped open. Looking to my right, Malcolm sat on the sofa with his arm around some girl.
“What are you doing here?” Adaline asked as I looked between her and Malcolm.
“I um . . . I saw you walk in here with Malcolm and I thought—”
Adaline lifted a finger for me to stop talking. “Yes. I have the locator turned on. Nothing. Okay, I’ll have to just buy another one I guess. Thank you so much.”
Hitting End, Adaline walked over and handed Malcolm the cell phone. “Thank you for letting me use your phone.”
Adaline looked at me with a disgusted face. Making her way over to me, she pushed me as hard as she could, causing me to stumble. “You asshole! You really thought I would just stop at the first guy I saw and fuck him?”
“Well no, but I saw you come into his bus and my mind started racing.”
Tears fell freely from Adaline’s eyes and it felt like someone had stabbed my heart with a knife. “I lost my cell phone. I was going to ask you to use yours but we got to talking and well, I saw Malcolm and asked if I could use his phone. Fucking around is not my thing, Emmit. That’s your m.o.”
Adaline pushed me out of the way and took off again. Only this time, I didn’t go after her. I closed my eyes and dropped my head as I muttered, “Fuck.”
“Lewis, this is going to be the one and only time I’m straight up and honest with you,” Malcolm said as I lifted my eyes to look at him.
“You are a damn good race car driver. Probably the best I’ve ever seen and I will deny I said that until the day I die. But dude, you are handling this all wrong. Fucking other women to try and forget the love of your life will never work. Trust me. It. Doesn’t. Work. Stop approaching your feelings for Adaline like you do a race. Listen to your heart, not your head.”
I opened my mouth to talk, I was rendered speechless. Squeezing my eyes shut, I opened them again and said, “Who the fuck are you, and what did you do with asshole Malcolm?”
With a shrug of his shoulders, Malcolm said, “I have my moments. Now go back to your bus, focus on the race and worry about the rest tonight.”
Not knowing how to even respond to Malcolm, I slowly made my way out of his bus, but not before turning one more time and looking at him. When he blew me a kiss, I huffed and said, “Asshole, I’m not going to let you lead one fucking lap today.”
Malcolm laughed and called out as the door shut, “That’s the Emmit I know and love!”
WRINGING MY HANDS TOGETHER, I sat next to my father as I watched Emmit race. The rain had caused a three-hour delay, but once they got to racing, Emmit had been leading a good portion of the day. Looking over to my father, I gave him the look. The look that silently asked if he thought Emmit might win.
I knew better than to ask the question out loud. First off, Emmit started in the pole position, and for him to actually win the race as well wasn’t really a common thing. Second, Daddy had called for four tires when mostly everyone else took on two. Emmit fought to get back into the lead and was currently in second place, behind Malcolm Wallace, who was hell bent on keeping his position.
Emmit’s spotter started talking over the radio. “Number twenty-three is one length ahead on the outside.”
Emmit came over the radio and said, “I don’t give a fuck where he is. Just tell me who the fuck is around me. I don’t give two flying fucks who is in front of me and what the fuck they’re doing.”
I shook my head and smiled. “I see his temper hasn’t changed any.”
My father huffed as he said, “Calm down. Keep your cool.”
His spotter came back over the radio. “Coming up on slow traffic. Keep your line. You’re gaining on twenty-three.”
“Fuck,” Emmit said as came up on Malcolm. Sitting up, I held my breath as they approached the turn.
I grabbed onto my father’s arm as I watched Emmit go for the lead. “Twenty-three is going high, go low.”