“No.” Maddy’s tone was cold. “This isn’t right for me.”
Jacks paused. An announcement for Kansas City echoed on the platform.
“What do you mean?”
“What I mean is I want you to leave me alone, Jacks,” she said tonelessly. Almost robotic. “I’m going home and I want you to stay away from me.”
It was as though the words had physically struck him.
“Both our lives are in danger, Maddy,” he said in a low, urgent voice, color draining from his face.
“My life is in danger because I’m with you, Jacks,” she snapped. “It’s like Sylvester said. They will never allow us to be together. If I go back to being a normal girl—”
“But you’re not a normal girl,” Jacks said.
“I am, Jacks. When are you going to realize that?” Her voice was almost hysterical now. “We come from two different worlds, Jackson, and I’ll never be allowed to be a part of yours. You belong here, in Angel City, saving people’s lives. I belong in my uncle’s diner. It’s just the way things are.” She was trembling now. The nausea rose in her stomach and her head screamed.
Jacks shook too.
“It was you who told me I have control over my own actions. It’s simple, remember? So I’ve made my choice. I want to be with you. I’ll keep you safe. We’ll get away.”
He held out his hand with the ticket in it.
“Do you trust me?”
Maddy thought about the night he had held out his hand before they went flying for the first time and then last night, when he had held it out to her in the pouring rain.
She wanted nothing more than to take it now, but doing so, she knew, would seal his fate.
“Jacks, I don’t want this anymore. I want to go back to the way things were.” She said the words clearly and carefully. His hand dropped to his side.
“Will you listen to me just this once?” he nearly yelled.
“I. . I like you, Maddy. I mean, more than just as a friend.
Are you so stubborn you can’t see that? Maybe last night meant nothing to you, but it meant something to me.” His eyes were vulnerable, almost tortured. “Did you ever even consider that I might love you, you stubborn, impossible girl?”
The words hit her. Another announcement blared over the platform speakers. It was the final boarding call for the Kansas City train. The words poured out of Jacks.
“You know, there’s something when you just know you fit together. And I fit with you. I don’t care what you are, human or anything else. It’s like a need, Maddy. So please.” He stopped and looked at her desperately. Nakedly.
“Give me a chance, Maddy.”
She turned away. Tears threatened to spill from her eyes; she couldn’t let Jacks see her face. She pushed the pain violently away. She had to keep her emotions under control. When her words came, they were unapologetic and hard.
“You’re a superstar, Jacks. The only person you know how to care about is yourself. You don’t love me. You’re just. . in love with the idea of loving me. It’s all about you, Jacks, don’t you see?”
He didn’t move or make a sound. Then he spoke.
“All about me? I saved your life.”
“You did,” she said. “And now I’m saving yours.”
She didn’t need to say more. There wasn’t even time.
At that moment something huge and powerful landed on the platform, pushing a wall of wind past them. It almost knocked Maddy off her feet. Panic shot through her system.
She put her hands up in defense, waiting for a repeat of the attack at her house, for the Angel to grab her by the throat again. But nothing happened.
A moment passed before she could open her eyes and see the Angel who had just landed.
It was Mitch. Shrieks of surprise and fear gave way to screams of excitement on the platform as all eyes turned toward them.
“Oh my God!” someone on the next platform yelled, and pointed. “It’s Mitch Steeple!”
Mitch looked at his best friend.
“Come on, man,” Mitch said. “There’s a car waiting for us out front.”
Jacks’s eyes darted to Maddy. She watched the full realization of her betrayal hit him.
“Jackson Godspeed!” a young girl shrieked. “OMG, it’s Jackson Godspeed!”
The chaos was abrupt and all encompassing. People began shrieking “WE LOVE YOU, JACKS!” and “FREE JACKS!” Maddy saw travelers drop their bags and push toward them like a gathering tidal wave.
“Maddy! There’s Maddy!” someone else screamed. A sudden mob rushed at her, pulling her away from Jacks.
“Wait!” Maddy called frantically. “Jacks!”
But it was impossible to be heard over the bedlam.
The crowd closed around her, and Jacks disappeared from her sight. Phones were held high and cameras snapped as the travelers pressed in desperately to get a picture with her.
Maddy shoved her way through the mob, trying to get back to Jacks, but the more she struggled, the farther away he became. It was like they were being carried apart on a violent sea.
When she caught a glimpse of him again, Mitch was pulling him away toward their waiting car. Jacks’s face was still shell-shocked. Expressionless. Blank.
Maddy yelled his name over and over, but Jacks was gone. All that was left was an ocean of strangers screaming and reaching for her. Her head snapped back as a hand behind her yanked at her hair.
“I want a picture!” a little girl demanded.
Maddy turned and ran.
She pounded out the tunnel and into the now-empty lobby. Behind her she could hear dozens of feet and glanced over her shoulder to see a literal crowd of people running behind her.
“Wait! We’re your fans!” a middle-aged woman yelled. “Will you sign my T-shirt?!”
Maddy didn’t dare look back again. She pelted out the front entrance and saw Kevin already there, idling at the curb in their station wagon. Maddy said nothing as she tumbled into the passenger seat and closed the door on the horde of people. Kevin quickly put the car in gear and drove away from the station, wordless.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
Maddy had thought she would never see her room again, and now here she sat on her bed, back as if nothing had happened at all. Her eyes stared unseeingly at the wall. She listened to the tick of her old alarm clock on the nightstand.
If not for the throbbing in her back and the lingering headache, Maddy might have convinced herself she was dreaming and any moment she would wake, back at the train station. With Jacks.
The drive back had been silent, Kevin looking straight ahead at the traffic while she sat numb and bewildered in the passenger seat. At home she had gone straight upstairs.
On her way through the living room she realized the house was much less damaged than she had imagined. It appeared only the windows and the front door had been destroyed beyond repair, along with some picture frames and dishes, and, of course, the old TV, which Maddy was kind of glad had finally been put out of its misery. Otherwise, the house was fine. Kevin must have cleaned up most of the mess in the morning, and some company had already been by to cover the window frames in plastic sheeting in preparation for new glass. In a day or two, the house would be back to the way it had always been. Normal.
Maddy wondered vaguely if that’s what would happen to her too. Kevin and Gwen and maybe even Ethan would clean up the emotional mess, and then the irreparable wounds, the memory of breaking Jacks’s heart at the station, would simply be covered in plastic until the damaged parts could be replaced. Time would do its job eroding the memories, dulling the sharp edges and fading the once-vi-brant colors. And pretty soon she would be back to the way she had always been. Habitual, average, routine. It was a terrifying idea, she thought. Some wounds were meant to be remembered. Some scars should never disappear.