“I suppose it is.” Veronica peeked up at him. “I don’t hate you. Diego and Cesar were more a part of my life than they were yours. Maybe that’s the part that scares me the most.”
“It doesn’t have to. You’re tough too. Tough enough to leave it behind.”
“No, I’m not. But I am smart enough to let people help me out.” Rising, Veronica picked up the tea. “I’m going to start by talking to your sister. Atlanta’s big enough to make good use of one of those clinics she wants to open. Maybe I can help her and Sera’s dad with some of the legal issues. It’s a baby step.”
“A baby step means you’re still moving forward.”
“It’s easier when it’s all in the family. Or will be, once you marry that girl.”
A family, one that centered around Carmen and Alec in so many ways. “With no more Conclave oversight, I wonder what people will say about that.”
Veronica shrugged. “People talk. That’s the first rule of being in charge. The more unhappy they are, the more they complain. So you do your best, and you ignore the talk.”
“Yeah.” He flashed her what he hoped was an encouraging grin. “Alec could probably use a political advisor, you know. Just putting that out there.”
“Bite your tongue, Julio.” His cousin shuddered dramatically. “I smiled at those bastards for most of my life knowing I might end up married to one. I don’t want to see any of them for at least a year. Maybe two.”
“Suit yourself. Me personally? I’d want to cause them a little bit of pain and consternation.”
“Revenge?” Something sparked in her eyes, a grim sort of amusement. “I suppose it would make them all miserable to have to deal with me as a political entity instead of a potential broodmare.”
“Food for thought.” Alec loathed dealing with other legacy wolves, but he seemed to derive a perverse satisfaction from making them deal with him. “I’m hitting the study for something harder than tea. You in?”
“You sure you wouldn’t rather go snuggle with Sera?”
“Plenty of time.” He tugged open the door and tilted his head to the hallway. “Come on. One drink.”
She looked vulnerable in that moment. Bruised and tired, and so clearly moved at the realization that coming to talk to her really hadn’t been an obligation or a duty. She swallowed hard and offered him a trembling smile. “Something tells me you and Sera are going to get me in a lot of trouble.”
It hurt, that look of pained gratitude, and Julio wrapped an arm around his cousin’s shoulders.
“I hope so. It wouldn’t be fair of us to hog it all.”
Sera smelled the Scotch before the bed dipped under Julio’s weight and bit back a smile.
“Were you drinking with Patrick?”
“Veronica.” He groaned and peered up at her through a squint. “She can drink too. What the hell?”
Her body ached and protested as she rolled onto her side and propped her head on her hand, but the worst of the pain was already behind her. Copious food and rest—both ordered and enforced by Carmen—had kicked her healing into high gear.
She ignored the twinge in her shoulder and smoothed Julio’s hair back from his forehead with a fond smile. “She’s five-eleven and finds kickboxing relaxing. I don’t care if she’s a submissive shifter, Veronica’s a badass.”
“Well, I’m glad I suggested drinking instead of sparring, then.”
“Uh-huh.” Whatever had happened, Julio seemed less weighed down. She stroked his temple. “Are you drunk, baby?”
He laughed. “No, already sobering up.” He rolled to face her. “I figured something out, though. I changed my mind about the council.”
“Before or after Veronica tried to drink you under the table?”
“Before.” Julio wrapped his hand around the back of her neck. “I’m not going to quit. If someone wants to hassle us, I’ll kick his ass…but I’m going to stick with it. You know that, right?”
It almost felt like a warning. “I don’t want you to quit. My dad warned me it wouldn’t be easy, and I told him the truth. I’m not afraid that it’s going to break me. You won’t let it. I’ll always be able to take more crap than you’re going to let anyone give me.”
His hand tightened as he closed his eyes. “I don’t want it to make you miserable. I’ve given Alec enough shit about that while he and Carmen have been in New York. It’s not right, and it isn’t fair. You didn’t sign up for this.”
“I didn’t mean—” She sighed. “It’s not the same. Carmen could walk away from the council and the wolves and live a normal life with other people like her. I don’t have that. I never will.”
“It doesn’t matter, not when I’m the reason they’re all treating you like shit.” He met her gaze with a determined look. “I’ll make it worth it.”
He still didn’t understand, and she wasn’t sure how to explain why the promise only twisted tension inside her. “You’re not the reason,” she said finally. “You’ll be the reason a few snotty wolves have to deal with me…but you’ll be the reason hundreds more are afraid to treat me like shit ever again. You don’t have to make it worth it. You’re the one who could have an easier life by picking a wolf.” And that was the part that hurt. The secret fear. “When you say that, I wonder if I need to make it worth it.”
“That isn’t what I want.” He sat up and smoothed a section of the comforter. “Marry me, and we’ll call it even. Worth every second, no matter what.”
Her heart stuttered. It was like getting hit on the head again, the room doing a crazy, swooping dance, but everything was warm and perfect this time. No pain. No fear. Just-“I want to have babies with you,” she blurted out, because yes wasn’t enough and it was the truest thing she could think of to say. The only thing that encompassed how far past yes she was.
He touched her cheek, traced the curve of her face down to her jaw. “Even if they won’t be coyotes?”
“Even if they would be coyotes.” She shivered and closed her eyes. “That was the possibility that always scared me the most. But it doesn’t with you. I don’t know if our kids will be wolves or coyotes or neither, but I know they’ll be safe and loved.”
His breath stirred her hair and then blew across her skin as he leaned close. “Because I love you.”
“That’s all I want.” She turned and whispered the words against his cheek. “Not a species. A family.”
“Family,” he echoed, then groaned. “Your dad. Is he gonna kill me?”
“No.” Relaxing back into the pillows, she smiled up into his too-serious eyes. “He’s going to worry. He’s my dad, he can’t help it. But I think he likes you well enough…for a wolf.”
“Good. Though I can’t say he’s my favorite coyote ever.”
“Better not be.” She traced the bridge of his nose with her fingertip and marveled at the simple gesture. Hers. He was hers to touch, to cuddle, all the tiny little things that she’d missed about keeping a man around longer than it took to screw him. She could spend the rest of her life touching him in a hundred ways, drowning in his strength, his love, his scent-His scent. She shot upright fast enough to wrench a stab of protesting pain from her back, and barely noticed it. “Oh my God. Oh God, I hadn’t even thought.”
Julio shot up after her. “What? What is it?”
“My mom.” A different sort of pain closed in on her, pressing against her chest until it was hard to drag in a breath. “She freaked out after I spent two nights in your guest bedroom. Your scent was barely on me. Not like now. What if I can’t ever see her again?”