still couldn't believe the way she'd acted practically throwing herself at Sam then
insisting they couldn't be involved and running away. She knew it was unlikely
the woman would even speak to her if she ever managed to work up the nerve
to call her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As she entered the cafeteria the hair on the back of her neck suddenly stood up.
She turned and her jaw dropped in shock. As if conjured by her thought there
stood Sam McKenna in the cafeteria line. Riley's eyes skimmed over her profile
taking in every detail. She was wearing sweats pants and a sweat stained t-shirt
with her damp black hair pushed back off her face. Riley sighed if anything she
was even more beautiful than she'd remembered. She didn't know what to do.
Should she approach her? Before she could make up her mind Sam suddenly
stiffened then turned to look directly at her, their eyes locked. Riley felt the
breath catch in her throat. She stood as if her feet were glued to the floor. She
deflated when Sam turned away again turning her back on her. Riley blinked
trying to stop the tears that had formed behind her eyes from falling. She
couldn't blame Sam for her reaction. She was the one who'd kissed and groped
her then insisted they couldn't be involved. Riley started to walk away then
stopped. Damn it, she muttered to herself, this might be the only chance you
get. Get your ass over there, apologize, and pray she'll listen to you. She ordered herself sternly.
Sam didn't know how but she knew before she turned that Riley was standing
there. All the hurt and anger she had been trying to overcome come boiling to
the surface at her first sight of the beautiful redhead in her rumpled scrubs. She
wanted to rush over and shake her until she came to her senses. At the same
time, the deep hurt Riley had caused kept her standing in place. She bitterly
reminded herself that Riley had made it clear she didn't want to be involved with
her. So she turned back to her place in the line wanting to just leave but
unwilling to risk walking past Riley.
Sam paid for the lunch she no longer wanted and headed for the nearest
trashcan her eyes never leaving her tray. She started when a soft hand grasped
her forearm. Sam knew who it was before she even looked down. She met the
violet eyes that haunted her dreams. She wasn't sure how long they stood and
simply stared at each other. Finally hearing someone loudly clear their throat,
she realized she was blocking the trashcan. She stepped aside never breaking
Riley's gaze.
Riley was speechless with one look into those amazing blue eyes. She could
clearly see the anger and hurt and knew it was up to her to make the first move.
She mentally shook herself trying to clear her thoughts.
"We need to talk," she said softly.
"I don't think we have anything to say to each other Dr. Connolly. You made that
perfectly clear the last time we spoke." Sam responded angrily. That wasn't what
Sam had wanted to say but her anger got the better of her. She cared for Riley
more than she had any woman she'd ever met and Riley had tossed her aside
without even giving her a chance.
Riley felt the tears break free and run down her cheeks. She knew she should
just walk away. She was making a public spectacle of herself. She didn't care
though; she had to convince Sam to listen to her... to give her a chance.
Riley reached out softly stroking Sam's arm. She couldn't help herself she
needed to touch her. When Sam didn't pull away, she felt her first spark of hope.
"Please Sam, I'm begging you. I made a mistake. Please!" Riley's voice was
getting louder.
Sam wanted to pull away from her touch but couldn't force herself to do it. She
looked around and saw they were starting to attract attention. When the tears
started pouring down Riley's cheeks her resolve broke.
"Okay, but not here." Sam finally acquiesced.
Before Sam could say anything else, Riley grabbed the tray out of her hand.
"Follow me please." She requested before heading for the door.
Sam followed docilely behind her enjoying the gentle sway of her hips as she
walked imagining what she'd look like without the clothes. She mentally slapped
herself. Don't even go there.
Riley led them to a small courtyard with several tables. She put the tray down on
the table and sat on one of the benches motioning Sam to sit next to her. Sam
looked longingly at the bench and then purposely walked over and sat at the
bench on the other side of the table opposite Riley. Riley looked at her with a
hurt expression but Sam hardened her heart. She didn't trust herself sitting so
close to Riley.
"So what did you want to talk about Dr. Connolly?" Sam asked trying hard to
keep her face expressionless. She wanted nothing more than to sweep Riley up
in her arms and kiss her senseless.
Riley cleared her throat before speaking. This was the only chance she would
get to convince Sam she'd made a mistake and ask her forgiveness. She knew
there was a very good chance Sam would choose to walk away. She'd hurt her
with her actions and she needed to take responsibility for that. It was time to lay
her cards on the table no matter what the cost.
"I made a terrible mistake Sam. The last two weeks have been the most
miserable of my life. I couldn't stop thinking about you and what I might have
thrown away. At first, I really did feel I couldn't be involved with a patient. Then
later when I found myself caring about you way beyond what a doctor feels for a
patient it scared me. You stirred something in me I'd never felt before and it
terrified me. I know I acted horribly and gave you mixed signals. I can't tell you
how sorry I am I hurt you."
Riley looked into Sam's eyes hoping to get some kind of reaction. Her eyes were
flat emotionless silver and impossible to read. Riley was getting desperate.
"Please believe me Sam I never meant to hurt you. I care about you deeply.
Please I'm begging you, give me another chance." Riley swiped away the tears
that had started to fall.
Sam wanted to believe Riley. It was taking everything she had to present an
emotionless demeanor to her. She just didn't know if she could do it. If Riley
changed her mind again Sam didn't think she could take it. She sighed heavily.
She was just kidding herself. She cared too deeply already not to give them a
chance no matter what the risks.
'I'm still your ex-patient." Sam reminded her.
"I don't care!" Riley stated emphatically.
"So where do we go from here?" Sam asked allowing her gaze to soften.
Riley almost swooned in relief.
"Have lunch with me?"
Sam smiled. "That's a start."
"Okay, I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere." Riley walked several steps way and turned back. "You won't leave right? You'll wait for me?"
Sam felt her heart soften further. Riley looked so nervous and scared she was
almost pleading.
"No Riley I won't leave. I promise. I'll be here when you get back." Sam assured
her.
Riley flashed a brilliant smile before heading back to the cafeteria almost running
in her haste to get back to Sam.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sam smiled as Riley escorted her out to her car. They had spent over two hours
in the courtyard talking. It had been awkward and uncomfortable at first but as