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hugged Riley to her chest and stuck her tongue out at her sister.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Riley never realized a botanical garden could be so much fun. Sam and Jess

had kept her in stitches with their antics. It'd been a long time since she'd just

gone out and had fun, not worrying about what other people might think. Though

at one point she and Kim had denied knowing the other two women when Sam

and Jess had skipped down one of the narrow brick paths singing 'We're off to

see the Wizard'. She chuckled remembering.

"What's so funny?" Sam asked. They were in the back seat of Jess's Durango

heading back to Sam's apartment.

"I was just remembering your and Jess's little impromptu song this afternoon. I

can't remember the last time I laughed so much in one day." Riley told Sam her

eyes sparkling.

Knowing Riley's history Sam vowed to herself right then to make sure Riley had

lots more days filled with laughter. She leaned down and gently kissed Riley's

lips. The passion flared between them and the kiss deepened. Both women

quickly forgot where they were. Sam pressed Riley back into the seat kissing her

passionately. Her hands came up to caress Riley's breasts. Jess glanced into

the rear view mirror and saw the two women.

"Alright none of that you two. I'm shocked." She teased.

Kim looked back as Sam pulled away from Riley. Riley caught Kim's eyes and

blushed.

She couldn't help chuckling. "Leave them alone Jess. Do I need to remind you

about the incident in the ER lounge?"

Sam was surprised to see her sister blush. "Oh... this is gonna be good." She

said rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

Jess looked pleadingly over at Kim. She just laughed. "Some other time." She

told a disappointed Sam.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They'd stopped on the way home and picked up Chinese food. They sat on the

floor in Sam's living room with the food spread across the coffee table. Riley had

finally relaxed around Kim and Jess; as the day had worn on the easy

camaraderie she'd felt with them in the hospital returned. Unbeknownst to her,

Jess had still had her reservations about Riley but her coming out to her uncle

and outing herself at work had allayed quite a few of Jess's fears. She watched

with a smile as Riley fed Sam a piece of shrimp. Sam was grinning like an idiot.

Jess had never seen her sister so smitten with anyone. It looked good on her.

"So Sam, what happened with the doctor? Did you get cleared?" Jess inquired.

Jess knew immediately she'd said something wrong as a look of total panic

crossed Sam's face. Riley had seen the look as well.

"What doctor? Did you get cleared for what?" she asked in concern.

This was it. The moment Sam had been dreading. She really had planned on

telling Riley she'd been cleared to return to work but had pushed it to the back of

her mind and conveniently forgotten.

"To go back to work." Sam said softly.

Riley had a flashback of that horrible moment in the ER when Sam's body

slammed into hers and she realized Keith had shot her. Then she saw Sam lying

in her arms as her blood seeped out between her fingers. Her face went ashen

and her stomach lurched. She jumped up from the floor mumbling excuse me,

before running from the room. All three women jumped when the bathroom door

slammed shut.

"You didn't tell her!" Kim exclaimed in an accusing tone.

"I meant to, really I did. I just forgot."

Kim glared at Sam unbelievingly. Sam slowly got to her feet to follow Riley. Kim

got up and placed a restraining hand on her arm.

"Let me go talk to her."

"No, I need to explain. I just... I knew she wouldn't take it well. But I never meant

to keep it from her."

Kim was incredulous. "You knew she wouldn't take it well! Jess and I both know

how dangerous your job is, we've both see officers come into the ER, but Riley

has seen first hand just how dangerous it is. My God, Sam... she saw you shot!

How did you think she'd react? I'm petrified for you to go back to work, think how

Riley must feel. This isn't something you can just explain away."

Sam's shoulders slumped and she sank back down to the floor. Jess put her arm

around her sister consoling her.

Kim headed for the bathroom and Riley.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kim knocked on the bathroom door. "Riley, its Kim, please let me in."

"I'll be out in a minute," came Riley's muffled reply.

Kim could tell she was crying. She tried the door handle; it was locked.

Riley stood gripping the counter trying to control her roiling stomach as the tears

poured down her face.

"Riley please open the door, I really need to talk to you."

Riley unlocked the door and walked away turning her back. Kim heard the lock

click and quietly opened the door. Riley stood next to the counter gripping it

tightly, her back to the door. Kim walked up behind her and put her hands on her

shoulders. Riley flinched then relaxed making no attempt to shrug off Kim's

touch. Kim could feel the tension in the muscles under her hands.

"She should've told you."

Riley didn't respond.

"She had every intention of telling you. She just kept putting it off...'cause she's

scared."

"She's scared!" Riley spun around to face Kim. "She's scared!" she repeated incredulously. "I saw her shot Kim; I felt her body slam into mine and held her in

my arms as her blood ran onto the floor."

Riley couldn't hold back any longer she began to sob. Kim wrapped her arms

around Riley pulling her into her arms. Riley buried her head in Kim's neck as

her whole body shuddered with the force of her tears. Kim stroked Riley's back

trying to calm her. It took quite a while but Riley's tears finally trailed off. She

pulled back from Kim embarrassed. Kim offered her some Kleenex and then

ignoring her protests pulled her back into her arms. Riley relaxed gratefully

accepting the comfort Kim offered.

"I know this is going to be hard to hear but I'm going to tell you anyway. I'll admit

I'm petrified that Sam is going back to work but Riley it's who she is. She loves

being a cop and she's a damn good one. She was scared to tell you because

she feared your reaction. Right now you're wondering if you made a big mistake

getting involved with Sam and are considering breaking it off." Riley flushed

guiltily. "That's what she feared Riley; that you would decide you didn't want to

be involved with a cop." Kim hoped she wasn't making a mistake in what she

was about to tell Riley but she needed her to understand. "Sam cares deeply for

you; if you walk away now Riley it'll kill her."

Riley looked up into Kim's eyes sympathetic blue eyes. "I know. She told me she

loves me and that she'd never been in love before." It was Kim's turn to be

shocked. If Sam had admitted her love to Riley, it was a much more serious

situation than she'd thought.

"I love her too Kim, but I don't know if I can do this. I don't know if I can watch

her walk out the door every morning and not know if she's coming back."

Kim hugged Riley tight. It was a truth that'd been driven home to everyone when

Sam was shot. On any given day, they could get a phone call like the one they

had when Keith shot her. Only this time she might not be so lucky. Kim knew you

couldn't let the 'what ifs' run your life or you'd be paralyzed. You had to live each