“You heard her, I have to. We can’t do this anymore.”
“Don’t say that. You’re not the girl my mom made you out to be. She’s wrong and you know it.” I reach out for Kinsley, but she takes a step back, shocking me. She’s never told me not to touch her.
“Why do you love me, Rhett? She’s the only mother you’ll ever get. You can’t throw it away for me.”
Her words are the equivalent to a slap across the face. “I love you, Sunny. I don’t care about what she says or does.”
“I wish we could go back to Fall Fest. I would do it all different.”
“You don’t mean that. That night was ours. It’s still ours. And it was perfect.”
“It doesn’t matter what it was. I have to go.”
“It does matter. You and the baby are all that matters to me. My mom’s mad, but she’s not going to get between us. I love you too much to give up now.”
Another tear slides down her cheek, and when she reaches up to wrap her arms around my neck, it’s unlike every other embrace she’s given me. This one’s empty. It doesn’t have the usual warmth of her body pressed against mine. She’s stiff—like she’s giving me an official good-bye.
“Don’t give up. Don’t leave.”
“I’ll always love you, Rhett,” she whispers, before opening the front door, and never once looking back. I’m losing her with each step she takes, and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. Not when my mother’s back at her side, making sure she leaves the property.
I stand in the doorway, listening to every word my hateful mother spews. “You’ll tell whoever asks that this child is not Rhett’s. I don’t care what story you make up, or who you say it belongs to, but you will not tarnish this family’s name or my son’s reputation. Have I made myself clear?”
Kinsley nods her head. “Yes.”
She hands Kinsley a white envelope before she gets inside her car, telling her, “You keep your end of the deal and I’ll make sure you have enough money to take care of your child. But you’ll stay away from my son if you know what’s best for you. I won’t give you a dime if you break your promise.”
Right before my eyes, I watch as my own mother destroys what’s left of Kinsley. I was willing to stand up and do the right thing—to take care of my responsibilities. All my mother wants to do is pay off my mistakes. Only Kinsley will never be a mistake.
I want Kinsley to get as mad as I feel—to stand up to her and tell her she could never love anyone else the way she loves me. To throw the envelope in her face and run back to me. I’d pack my shit and leave today if it meant we were together. Only she doesn’t do that. She simply nods her head, accepting the deal offered to her without a single question asked.
She isn’t going to fight for me.
For us.
Or for our family.
MY TEARS ARE falling almost as hard as the rain pounding against the road. Between the two, I can barely see to drive home. My head is pounding, my ears are pulsing, and my chest is so tight I can barely breathe.
Walking away was the right choice, but the envelope I tossed on the dashboard is staring back at me like I’m a total fool. Mrs. Taylor may think she paid me off, but there’s no way I would ever take her money. The only reason the envelope is in my possession was to convince Rhett that I’m done. That I want him to pick his family over me. He should work on repairing his relationship with his mother and let me go.
Still, all I want is to turn my car around and run back into his arms where I’m safe. The thought of being without him kills me inside, but in my heart, I can’t deprive him of the one thing I want back more than anything—my mom. He doesn’t realize how lucky he is to have both his parents, even if his mom has been a total bitch to me.
Rolling down my window, the cool air whips my hair around, and raindrops land on my arms. I hold the envelope in my hand, ready to toss it into the nearest puddle, but I can’t. It’s dirty money—money I’ll never have a use for, but there has to be someone who can benefit from it. Someone who will use it for good instead of evil.
I stuff the money into my bag, and when I pull into my driveway, I’m relieved Carson’s car isn’t there. But when I open the door, and let the rain pound down on me, it hits me that I’ve lost both Rhett and Carson in the same day. All I have left is Wyatt, and I can’t go to him with any of my problems.
I’m right back where I started—completely alone.
I take my time walking up the stairs, in no rush to get inside an empty house. The key turns in the lock, and the door creaks open. All the lights are off, except the one above the kitchen sink.
My bag falls to the door, and my soaked shirt sticks to my skin. When I try to peel it away from my body, I notice the faint bump underneath. It looks like I ate too much, and if you didn’t know I was pregnant, you wouldn’t think twice about it. Only I know what it really means.
I glance inside Carson’s room to see if he’s gone for good. It’s not bare like I was expecting it to be, but the suitcase he was tossing around is gone.
He really left.
It’s not supposed to hurt this much, but it does. Tonight I need his shoulder to cry on. I need my friend. The same friend I once thought I wanted to marry. I had it all figured out. We’d fall in love, throw a huge wedding with lots of flowers, and he’d take me on a surprise honeymoon to Paris—just like in the movies we watched.
Since I met Rhett, I realized Carson wasn’t the one I was supposed to end up with, despite the feelings I used to have for him. It doesn’t matter though. Like everyone else in my life—I lost him, too.
I open the lid to my jewelry box and pick out the yellow twisty tie ring I gave him when we were little kids. The same one he gave back to me a couple months ago when he told me he wanted to be with me—the night I chose Rhett instead.
I slide it on my finger, wondering how different my life would be right now if I would have picked Carson—if I would have listened to my ten-year-old self instead of this eighteen-year-old girl I hardly recognize anymore.
Regret creeps up my throat, threatening to eat me alive. I lost Rhett, and I’m already having trouble imaging a tomorrow without him in it. I lost Carson, too. If I could go back and do it all over, I’d still choose Rhett, but I would have been more careful. I would have thought about the future more, and less about what everyone expected from me.
Now I’m left to figure my life out on my own and a day without support from Carson and love from Rhett isn’t one I can imagine. Not when the world is about to find out what we’ve been hiding.
All I want to do is crawl into a hole and pretend this isn’t my life—that it’s all a dramatic nightmare I’ll wake up from as soon as I snap my fingers. But no matter how many times I click my heels and pray for something to change, it doesn’t. I’m still Kinsley West, the failure.
My body shivers I’m so cold. When I look in my closet for dry clothes, all my favorite pieces remind me of time spent with Rhett. I sink down to the floor, staring at the small pile of shoes in front of me. Even those have miles on them—miles I shared with the only guy I’ve ever truly loved.
I want my boyfriend back so bad it hurts.
And I need my friend to tell me it will be okay.
“Kins.”
I’m positive I hear Carson’s voice, but I’m not asleep. Like I’m in a dream, my arms are pulled out of my shirt before it’s lifted over my head. Warm cotton sucks me up, eventually falling to the top of my thighs.
I hear his voice again. “What did he do to you?”
Nothing. I’m the one who ruined everything. The urge to convince him Rhett’s not responsible is so strong, I finally open my swollen eyes. Carson’s kneeling in front of me, pulling off my shoes and socks. “It’s really you,” I whisper.