“But I feel like shit.”
“The choice comes with a price,” he said.
“I’m confused,” I said.
“I think it took a great deal more energy from you than it should have to raise this zombie and fight what the Ulfric did by accident. I think it took energy to defeat Primo. To feed on Byron and myself. I think that took not just physical energy, but mental, as well. You are not a creature of casual lusts, and I think it cost you more than you will admit to feed your master tonight.”
I would have argued the master part, but it was becoming a case of the lady protesting too much. “So what do I do?”
“You need to feed,” he said simply.
I gave him a look.
He smiled and raised a hand as if to prove he was innocent. “It does not have to be me, or even Graham. It does not have to be this moment, but it must be soon, Anita. Surely, you feel that.”
I just stood there and stared at him. I’d wished for control of theardeur for so long, and now I had it, sort of. I didn’t have to feed unless I wanted to, but if I waited too long, I’d get sick. I shook my head. “I thought control of theardeur meant you could just skip it and not feed it at all.”
“Who told you that?”
I started to say, Jean-Claude, then stopped. What had he said about theardeur? That I’d gain control of it. That I’d learn how to feed from a distance. Had he ever promised that it would go away? No, he hadn’t. I’d just wantedcontrol to mean it would be gone. No one had promised that. No one. Shit.
“No one,” I said, “I just heard it that way. I wanted theardeur to be gone. I wanted it to go away, so I just kept thinking that’s what it would mean.”
“I am sorry to be the one to tell you that it is not so.”
I looked at his face, studied it. “You sound like you know what you’re talking about.”
“I do not carry theardeur. To hold the completeardeur as our dark mistress does is very rare, even among her own bloodline.”
“Then how do you know that that’s what’s happening to me?”
“Logic,” he said, “and just because I do not carry it, does not mean I have not seen one who did.”
“Who?’
“Ligeia.” He turned away as he said the name so I couldn’t see his face.
“I don’t know the name, at least not as a vamp.”
“It does not matter, for she is dead.”
I touched his face. “What happened?” I asked.
He looked at me, but his face held that distance that the old ones have when they don’t want you to know what they’re thinking. “Belle Morte killed her.”
“Why do I feel like I should say I’m sorry for asking?”
He gave me the smallest of smiles. “Because you are not insensitive.”
That one comment let me know that Ligeia’s death meant a lot more to him than just another cruel death. She’d meant something to him, and it was none of my business.
“The customers are getting restless,” Graham called back to us. He was standing a little ahead of us with my bag in his hands. He’d given us privacy like a good bodyguard.
I looked past him and saw one of the lawyers waving at us.
Restless indeed.
“Even if I was willing, I don’t think they’d wait while we went back to the car to feed theardeur. ”
He gave me a real smile this time, with enough humor to drive out the blankness in his eyes. “I fear you are right.”
“Then we muscle through this, and you guys can drive me back to the club.”
“Where yourpomme de sang waits,” he said.
“Yeah.” I wondered if I was going to get back in time to see any of Nathaniel’s dance. I suddenly saw Nathaniel in front of a mirror.
He was putting eyeliner around his lavender eyes. He stopped in the middle of it and said, “Anita?”-a question like he wasn’t sure.
Requiem had both my arms now. I’d have gone to my knees, if he hadn’t caught me. “Anita, what happened?”
“I thought about mypomme de sang, and I could see him. He’s getting ready to go on.” I was dizzy, and when Requiem cradled me against him, I didn’t complain. “I’ve had mind-to-mind communication with Richard and Jean-Claude. It’s never been this draining.”
Requiem picked me up, and again I was wishing I’d worn a longer skirt. God knew what he was flashing the graveside with. But I couldn’t stand, the world was swimming. “Jean-Claude is the master of your triumvirate with the Ulfric, but you are the master of Nathaniel and Damian. It is your power that makes this partnership move, and that, too, uses energy.”
“Does everyone know what happened between the three of us?”
“No, he told only Asher and myself, among his vampires. Perhaps his ownpomme de sang, Jason. He keeps little from him.”
I frowned at him, as the world stopped spinning. “Why you?”
“I am his third, after Asher.”
News to me, though of the vamps I’d met, I couldn’t think of anyone I’d have preferred for the job. The night was solid again. “I think I can walk.”
He looked doubtful.
“Let me try,” I said.
He lowered me to the ground, but kept an arm around me like he expected me to collapse at any minute. I guess I couldn’t blame him, but it bugged me anyway. I didn’t collapse. Great. In fact, I felt pretty good, considering. I kept a hand through his arm, so it looked like he was escorting me the last little bit of the way. Only he and I, and maybe Graham, knew just how shaky I was feeling.
Edwin Alonzo Herman was regaling his audience with a story of how he’d tricked someone into signing away a small fortune. In these modern times it would have been considered swindling, but not back in the late 1800s or even early 1900s. Many of the laws on the books about money and how you can legally acquire it stem from the old robber baron days when almost anything was fair game. Most of the ways that the first millionaires in this country won their fortunes would be illegal today. But Herman had them laughing. He looked positively rosy-cheeked, and very much the center of attention of the group of lawyers and descendants. Everyone was willing to be happy, they’d won, and the man telling the story had helped them win. If someone had saved me millions of dollars, I’d like them, too, I guess.
He finished his story to laughter, and shining faces. “I’m ready to complete the contract gentleman, and ladies,” I said.
Some of them had to shake my hand.
“Splendid job, Ms. Blake, splendid job.”
“Wow, I mean, like wow.”
“Honestly, I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen you do it.”
Apparently, I was included in the good feelings. Most people get a little uncomfortable when it’s time to put the zombie back, if he looks alive enough.
Requiem stopped the compliments. “Ms. Blake has had a difficult night, gentlemen, if you could allow her to finish her work, then she can rest.”
“Oh, terribly sorry… We didn’t know. Thank you… worth every penny.” And they began to drift away.
Edwin Alonzo Herman looked down at me, and it wasn’t a friendly look. “I understand that I am supposed to be dead and only your magic gave me life again.”
I shrugged and asked Graham to please get the machete and the salt from the bag.
“I’ve also been told that vampires have rights and are considered citizens. Am I not merely another kind of vampire? If I were declared alive, I would be a very, very wealthy man. I would be willing to share that wealth, Miss Blake.”
I clung to Requiem’s arm and looked up at the zombie, so self-assured. “You know, Mr. Herman, you’re one of the few old ones that I’ve ever raised that have grasped the possibilities so quickly.
You must have been something special in your day.”
“Thank you for the compliment, and may I return one? This must be a unique gift that you have. Together we could turn it into an empire.”
I smiled. “I have a business manager, but thanks anyway.” I let go of Requiem and found I could stand without falling. Good to know. I was actually feeling a little better just standing on the grave by the zombie, because no matter how good he looked, that’s what he was. I took the jar of salt from Graham’s hand.
“Miss Blake, if I am only another type of walking dead, then is it fair to deny me the same chance that this vampire has gotten?”