Shit, I’m frightened. What if he’s not following me?
Then everything is lost. I’m a complete failure. All of this planning and plotting. For nothing.
My heart beats out of my chest as I near the post.
“Slut!” says a girl to me as she walks past me.
I laugh.
Funny, if I was called a slut before my experience at the submission school, I would have gotten all hot and bothered.
Now it’s a compliment, sending me back to the cold cell underneath the submission school, with a thrill and a surge of raw power from within.
Almost there.
I reach the post, take a deep breath, turn around, and put one leg up behind me onto it. Just like in rehearsal.
I close my eyes, say a small quick prayer, and then open them.
No Lukas Thorn.
Fuck.
Shit. Fuck. Shit.
Rabidly, I scan the faces of the crowd. He’s got to be here! Lorena assured me he couldn’t resist the challenge!
But nothing.
Fuck.
Shit. Fuck. Shit.
Okay, what do I do now?
Nothing. I’m going to wait this out. I’m just going to lean seductively on this post for as long as it takes. I know he’s coming. He’s got to be coming. I just need to give it time for the challenge to sink in, right?
Right? Answer me! Oh fuck, who am I talking to?
I close my eyes, take a deep breath, count to ten slowly, and open them again.
And there he is.
Oh God, it worked! It fucking worked!
I try not to leap out of my skin with absolute joy at the sight of the most gorgeous man on Earth. Like the crowd on the very same street just parted for me, the entire world seems to clear out of his way as he slowly saunters toward me.
Then he stops, shrugs his shoulders with a look that says WTF, and then glances back at his house party.
Come on, buddy! You’re not here yet! Come on! Don’t give up now! You don’t want those girls! You want me!
He shakes his head again like he can’t believe what he’s doing, or like he just figured out it’s me. Yeah, that’s it.
He puts his arm up to his neck and scratches while lowering his head.
Gahhhhhhhhhh, I love it when he does that. He can put his arm up to his neck and scratch while lowering his head all day, I’ll just watch, and I’ll be fine.
What is it about this man? What is the incredible power he has?
I mean, I used to turn my head at guys all the time, thought I might have given myself whiplash a few times. But ever since I laid eyes on this one, in that goddamned aluminum tube in the sky, I’ve barely noticed another man.
Well, no, there was Cock Toy. You couldn’t help but notice him. And the black boy with the endless dong. And, of course, Trevor.
He turns like he’s going to walk back.
Shit.
Lorena told me what to do here, forcing me to practice it in the mirror a hundred times. I lower my face, close my eyes while facing downward, and then slowly open my eyes fully while smiling.
She called it an “underlook.” Apparently, it’s something Lord Byron used to do when seducing ladies. I fell asleep in my Victorian poetry class back at Wellesley, so I didn’t pay much attention to Lord Byron but apparently he did this thing that made women swoon. It’s used mostly by guys, but girls can adapt it for much the same effect.
Damn, if I don’t see him melt.
Oh my God, he melts!
I sense it. I feel it. It’s like a moment. We are one. We are separated by about five hundred feet, with maybe a thousand or so frolickers in between us, but that ethereal connection binds us stronger than the most powerful magnet on earth.
I swear he could whisper and I could hear him. This is so intense. Life is so intense. I’m more alive now in this moment than I have ever been.
He isn’t immune to the force pulling us together, either. Or more like pushing. Because no matter what we do, it seems like when we’re in the same spot, gravity draws us to each other.
He shakes his head again, laughing with that mysterious and oh-so-sexy half-smile. Then he throws one more glance behind him and begins walking to me.
Yes!
Yes, Lorena! You were right! I did it!
Holy shit, I have such power! I never knew I could affect the world around me like this. It’s like I wield magic.
But, no, I know what it is. I used to carry myself differently. Like Karissa said and like Lorena has tried to convince me, I have a certain attractiveness that I’ve kept hidden.
No, I’m not the most glamorous girl in the room. No, I don’t have the sexiest body. Yes, I could lose a few.
But I’ve got it. That certain something that makes a man like Lukas Thorn scratch his neck, look down, smile, and turn to approach me . . . me! . . . after leaving a fucking houseful of skinny beautiful model-type girls.
Damn, I think I could rule the world if I put my mind to it! I want to scream from the rooftops with joy!
Life, I am you!
The walk of Lukas Thorn as he saunters down the street is like a gladiator claiming his victory trophy. There is nothing he can’t do. He knows it, the world knows it.
In fact, we’re already attracting attention. Yes, there are other people in costume around us. Yes, it’s a wild and crazy festival.
But the profound intensity between the two of us is so statically charged that a handful of people stop to watch. They sense something powerful about to happen.
It’s the girls that notice it first, naturally, walking while holding hands with their boyfriends. They pull, motioning him to stop, while they stare.
Girls know. We have a much stronger sense of invisible human connection than guys. We can look at a room and know exactly what’s going on. Most guys are clueless at this.
But the girls on this street know. They see the volcanic fire erupting between this flowing god and the water nymph . . . and they want to see how it turns out.
After what feels like five centuries, Lukas Thorn finally reaches me. He pauses about a foot in front of me.
“It is you,” he says.
“Is it?” I say with a cheeky challenging tone.
He makes an ooooooh gesture with his lips, without saying anything. “You know, I–” His eyes catch my body paint and stare. He’s transfixed.
I giggle to myself inside.
“I don’t know what you’re doing here, Jayd, but it’s not going to work. I bet Lorena came up with this. Tell her I’m done.”
“I know your fantasy.”
“Excuse me? My what?”
“Your ultimate fantasy. Domination. Control. I’m offering it to you.” I lean into his ear. “Remotely.”
His eyebrows rise. I’ve said his favorite word, according to Lorena. He laughs. “Excuse me?”
“Control. It’s what you want. It’s what you crave. It’s your fetish. I’m giving you control of me. Give me commands and I will follow them. You can tell me to go home if you want, and I promise you I will. But I don’t think that’s what you will do. I’m offering you everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I’m your complete property, Lukas Thorn.”
His eyes nearly pop out of his head. “Look, I can’t say I’m not impressed. I’m very impressed. But–”
This is where Lorena coached me the most, on what to do next.
I leap forward, grab his hand, and place the transmitter in his palm. He looks down at it, and I turn and run across the street. I plant myself against the building on the far corner, the hard hot gray stone scratching my naked back in the night heat.
The street separating us now is busier than the others. Cars stream between us. I point at my ear with the Bluetooth receiver implanted inside.
He puts the transmitter up to his mouth. My heart is beating faster than ever. This is it. This is me putting my head on the chopping block.
He can say “Go home.” That’s all he needs to do. He can just tell me to go and I will. That’s the bargain. That’s the agreement. I always keep my agreements.