“Tenley called you?”
About twenty times. I’d ignored them all. “No. Jay did.”
I could tell there was a lot Lisa wanted to ask, but she chose her questions carefully. She started with the most telling one. “Did Tenley stay at your place last night?”
“Yeah. She was pretty shaken up after The Dollhouse bullshit. Sienna pushed her around a bit before Tenley fought back. She couldn’t manage the stairs to her apartment because of her hip. Besides, TK was at my place and Tenley wanted to see her.”
I was rationalizing the hell out of my actions, but I didn’t need Lisa’s judgment. I’d spent enough time without Tenley. Now that she was back, I wasn’t inclined to play it cool and take all sorts of space. Even if the smarter course of action was to dip a toe in and check the temperature before diving headlong into a boiling pot of water. I was a diver, not a dipper.
“Did you have sex with her?”
“Seriously? I don’t get all up in your personal business and ask if you’re putting out for Jamie on the regular,” I snapped.
“Jamie and I have sex daily. Usually in the morning, because that’s when Jamie has the best longevity and it puts me in a good mood. There. Now I’ve shared. Your turn.”
I cringed at the mental image. “Why, Lisa? Why would you tell me that? I don’t need those details.”
“Oh? And here I thought that’s what this was about. The only time you’ve been reticent about your previous sexual escapades is when you were with Sienna, and when you broke your own stupid rule with Tenley. Based on how dodgy you’re being, I’m pretty sure I know the answer to the question anyway.”
“And your point is?”
Lisa arched a brow. “I’m just checking to see where you’re at. She’s been gone for weeks and you’ve been a mess. She comes back, and the first thing you do is fall into bed with her? After everything that’s happened, do you think that’s a good decision?”
“We talked first.”
“And everything’s better? After one conversation?”
“There were two conversations. One last night and one this morning.”
“And when did you get it on, in between the two?”
“After the one this morning.” Because that made it so much better.
“Oh. Well, then. Two heartfelt chats later and you’re over her leaving with no explanation?” Lisa asked snidely.
“No, but it’s not like I can pull a do-over, can I?”
“I believe you’ve tried that before, with little success.”
I glared at her. “I don’t understand why you’re being like this. I figured you’d be glad we were sorting shit out.” Although, if I was honest, the sex with Tenley complicated the situation. All my anger, frustration, and fear had funneled right into the hard, fast, mind-blowing, multiple-orgasm bliss. While it had been a good form of stress relief, it unearthed a barrage of other crap I wasn’t ready to deal with. I kept that shit to myself.
“I’m happy she’s back, but you need to be careful, and not just for your sake. You two have a lot to sort through.”
“Like I said, we’re working it out. She gets that I’m angry with her for leaving, and I’m not telling her everything is fine now that she’s back.”
“That’s great. But there’s more to this than Tenley leaving, and the things you learned about her. You’ve got your own skeletons you’re not dealing with. You can’t keep them buried forever.”
There was a knock on the door and Jamie poked his head in. He looked from me to Lisa and back again. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said slowly. “Amy’s here.”
His timing couldn’t have been better. “Perfect. I’ll be right out.”
“Do you want a minute?” he asked.
“Nope. We’re good here.”
“I’ll let her know.” Jamie’s head disappeared and he left the door open.
When I tried to get around Lisa, she put a hand on my arm, a gentle request to hear her out.
“Remember that talk we had about things not always being black and white, back before you started the outline on Tenley?”
“What about it?”
“Maybe you need to find a middle ground, so this thing with Tenley isn’t all or nothing. She obviously wants to be with you, like you want to be with her. All I’m suggesting is this time you might want to slow down and get all the important stuff out of the way first.”
Lisa had a valid point. I wasn’t good at taking things slow and Tenley was no exception. I’d practically lived in her apartment as soon as I got into her pants. But it wasn’t just about the sex back then, and it wasn’t now. It made the whole issue difficult to navigate. I wanted her, and I wanted to be with her; separating the two needs was a challenge. They were entwined; one begot the other. But then, I’d never felt about anyone else the way I felt about Tenley.
“Have you been talking to Nate?”
Lisa’s nose crinkled. “What? Why?”
“Because you sound like him with your life metaphors and therapizing.”
“‘Therapizing’?”
“I’m pretty sure it’s a word. If not, I’m petitioning to have it added to Webster’s.”
Lisa rolled her eyes, then grew serious once more. “Therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you.”
“I already know what’s wrong with me.”
She gave me a look. “Just think about what I said. I’m on your side. Tenley was good for you before she left. I hope she still is. I would hate to see it all fall apart again because you’re still protecting each other from your pasts. Relationships are no easy thing. Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of crap.”
Lisa left me standing there, somewhat stupefied. She and Jamie didn’t fight, not that I ever saw. Occasionally Lisa was snippy or Jamie was in one of his moods, but they were always respectful of one another and affectionate to the point of making those around them gag. I often teased Jamie for being pussy whipped and he didn’t deny it. It never occurred to me that they had issues—but then, I guess I wouldn’t have that insight, considering how guarded I was. No one had ever gotten close enough for me to contend with real problems. Not until Tenley. So far, I seemed to be sucking at it.
I was still a little dazed when I came out of the room to greet Amy. Since Chris didn’t have a client, they were chatting it up. Amy had her hand on his forearm, her head thrown back in laughter.
“Hey, gorgeous!” she exclaimed when she saw me.
“How’s it going?” I accepted the brief hug.
“Awesome! I’m superpsyched.” She tilted her head to the side. “You look different.”
“I haven’t had a haircut in a while.” I scratched the side of my head. My hair was getting long and I’d been in too much of funk to ask Lisa to take care of it.
“No, I noticed that last week. I meant to tell you that you look almost civilized with all that hair. But don’t worry, the piercings keep you badass.”
“That’s a relief. I wouldn’t want to go mainstream or anything.”
“How tragic would that be? Still, there’s something . . . I don’t know. I’ll tell you when I figure it out.” She looked me over in a clinical, assessing way, which wasn’t unusual for her since she worked as an EMT. When she couldn’t come up with anything, she dropped it and clapped her hands together. “Should we get started?”
I smiled. “Let’s do it.”
Like Lisa and Tenley, she was feisty, but less subdued. In two-hour blocks, Amy was an awesome dose of energy. I always finished a session with her wanting to run a marathon or something.
I led her to the private room and gave her specific directions on what clothing she needed to remove. Because the tattoo spanned from ribs to thigh, she’d have to lose everything from the waist down. We could work around her shirt, but she couldn’t wear her bra. We had smocks to cover the important parts, but I’d still be looking at most of her ass the entire time. It was unavoidable.