Fluttering back to earth like confetti, I felt Jake’s hips jerk against me. He threw his head back as he came and I watched him through lidded eyes, feeling my inner muscles contract in aftershocks around him as his climax drew out. Finally, he shuddered to a stop, his head dropping forward to my shoulder. His hands relaxed around my wrists as he kissed me and pressed a clammy cheek to my muggy skin. “Baby,” he moaned. “What was that?”
I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. “That was a loss of control,” I whispered, still languid and dazed.
Jake’s fingers gripped my hip as lifted his head to look into my eyes, his own suddenly filled with remorse. “Did I hurt you?”
I shook my head, a small smile playing on my lips. “You exhausted me, but not hurt.” I brushed a thumb tenderly over his mouth. “It was … wow.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, seeming just as dazed. “I … I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you.”
I smiled at him, shielding him from my inward wince as he pulled out of me. “I’m on the pill, by the way,” I murmured casually since he’d obviously forgotten about protection in his determination to have me.
Jake groaned as I moved over to make space on the twin bed. “I’m a genius tonight.”
“We’re good,” I assured him and he smiled as I yawned. “Sorry. You’ve tired me out.”
He kissed me softly, the tip of his tongue just touching the tip of mine. “I’ll let you sleep.”
“Mmm, I guess we’re done taking it slow.”
He laughed softly, enfolding his arms around me. Jake snuggled me close and I decided for tonight not to think about anything too serious or too worrying and just delight in the languorous satisfaction of mind-blowing sex that had melted my limbs.
I was relaxed, at peace for the first time in a long time, when Jake pressed his mouth to my ear and whispered, “I love you, Charley Redford.”
Stiffening at the confession, it took me a few seconds to get my breathing back under control. Fear shot through me, paralyzing me, and the words I was sure I felt, lodged in my throat.
I couldn’t say it back.
I wasn’t ready.
Instead, I snuggled deeper into him, hoping he’d understand my silence.
Jake’s fingers brushed through my hair gently. “I can wait.”
A heavy weight was settled on my back, foreign limbs tangled with mine, and I felt trapped against the mattress for a second as I tried to work out what was happening.
I pried my eyes open, wincing against the light filtering in through the thin curtains at my small window. The bleariness eventually cleared from my vision, and I caught sight of my hand on the mattress beside my head and realized masculine fingers were curled around my wrist.
The night before came flooding back to me and the memory of Jake surging inside of me had my lower belly clenching in lust. My wrist twitched in his hot grip and I felt and heard a masculine purr against my shoulder.
Jake was sleeping across my back, his face pressed to my skin, his torso half on me, half on the mattress and his knee bent between my legs.
He shifted, rousing from his contented sleep.
I’d never woken up with Jake after a night of sex and sleeping together. During our eight-month relationship, we’d been too young to have that moment. Feeling myself get stupidly weepy about it, I covered it by grumbling against my pillow, “If you’re going to be settled heavily between my legs, I should at least get something good out of it.”
His chuckle rumbled through his chest and moved against my back in a deliciously intimate way. “Morning to you too.”
“Mmm, morning.”
He let go of my wrist and coasted a hand down my side, his touch shivery soft, as he caressed my bottom and then gently slipped two fingers inside me. I groaned, widening my legs.
“Baby.” Jake’s dick hardened against my outer thigh. “You’re wet already.”
I curled my fingers into the sheets. “Don’t stop.”
He kept gliding in and out of me slowly, torturously building tension as his mouth scattered kisses all over my skin. Stopping his sensual assault, Jake eased off to turn me onto my back. His dark eyes glistened in the morning light as he teased strands of my wavy hair between his finger and thumb. “I missed your hair,” he kissed it, dropping it to pick up my hand so he could press kisses along my knuckles. “I missed everything about you.”
“I missed you too,” I confessed quietly, smiling through the tears in my eyes. “Like a whole lot.”
He smiled back at me before he turned his attention to kissing every inch of me. Spending more time between my legs than anywhere, his masterful use of his tongue on my clit had me breaking apart. Loudly. He levered himself up, bracing above me, and as my lower half still shuddered in climax, Jake moved inside me slowly. I sighed in pleasure, and my hands gripped his waist as he rocked into me gently. His head dipped to kiss me deeply, meaningfully, reassuringly.
That morning Jake spent a long time making me come, making me dazed, and making love to me. It was a stark contrast to our fast and furious sex the night before and far, far more beautifully scary.
We didn’t come out of my room until early afternoon, waiting until we were sure my roommates had gone for the day. I’d been pretty loud and was almost a little embarrassed to face them. Especially Gemma, who probably wouldn’t take too kindly to her roommate having loud sex with her friend’s ex-boyfriend.
Pouring Jake a black coffee as he settled on the seats by the kitchen window, I winced as I remembered my attitude the night before. Taking the coffee over to him, I attempted to ignore the hot, satisfied look in his eyes as I approached. It would only distract me and we really needed to talk.
“I’m sorry about my attitude last night,” I told him quietly, handing him the mug. “I know you were just trying to be a good guy.”
Reaching over for the nearest chair, I was about to take a seat in the opposite corner when Jake pulled me onto his lap. It brought me close to him and my nostrils flared slightly at the scent of my perfume lingering on him.
Something primal and possessive rushed through me at the realization.
Jake was mine again.
The breath whooshed right out of me.
“You don’t have to be sorry. No one does. It’s a shitty situation,” he assured me. “But I promise it’s the last time I prioritize her over you. I just … felt I owed her last night. I owed it to be patient and kind with her. I owe you more, though, Charley. I promise it won’t happen again.”
I nodded in understanding. “Does Melissa finally get what’s happening here?”
His eyes dimmed as he nodded. “She’s still pretty broken up. She kept talking around in circles, trying to convince me … I eventually had to just lay it out. I told her I was in love with you and I always would be. I told her I was sorry, but that nothing she said could change my mind.”
I closed my eyes, remembering how awful it was to lose him. “I feel terrible for her.”
He cupped the back of my head, just behind my ear, while his thumb pressed lightly against the pulse in my neck. My eyes popped open as he leaned his face into mine. “You have nothing to feel guilty about, okay? I won’t have that on you.”
A memory of the first time Jake held me like that—on the track at school back home—came to me only to be obliterated by the memory of him holding Melissa like that in the student union.
An ache I thought was gone cut through me and I jerked my head from his grip. “Don’t.”
He frowned, a flicker of unease passing through his eyes. “Don’t what?”
Trying to understand my own reaction, I shook my head. My only guess … I wasn’t quite over what he’d had with Melissa. I’d had a relationship too, so it wasn’t that (although we needed to discuss it and I wasn’t particularly looking forward to telling Jake about the particulars). It was just that I’d never had closeness with anyone but Jake, and Jake … well, he’d definitely been close to Melissa. Despite his declaration of love and my silence on the matter, I realized that deep down, I was worried I was always going to be that little bit more in love with Jake than he’d ever be with me. That didn’t sit well. Not at all.