Chapter 15
WHAT ARE YOU doing on Saturday?” Cal asked Meredith cryptically on Friday morning.
“Nothing much,” she smiled at him. She knew what day it was, and what he probably had in mind. Saturday was Valentine's Day, and she was staying in California for yet another weekend. Steve had already told her days before that he was working and there was no point in her flying to New York. They had canceled yet another weekend, and it was worrying her that they seemed to be drifting apart so swiftly. It concerned her even more that the life that she was building with Cal was becoming more solid by the minute. They saw each other nearly every night, and he stayed over whenever he could get away with it. She had dinner with him and the kids, and went to basketball games and movies and other places with them, every weekend. She was becoming a fixture. And he was beginning to feel like her husband.
No one at work had spotted anything yet, and they were supremely careful to see that that didn't happen. And his kids didn't seem to have any suspicions either. Everyone seemed to assume that they were the same friends they'd always been since she'd started working for him. But sooner or later she knew that someone might discover them, and then they would have a serious problem. It would hardly have been appropriate for people to know she was cheating on her husband.
“How about dinner at Fleur de Lys tomorrow night?” he suggested casually, and she smiled with pleasure.
“I'd love it.” It seemed odd not to spend Valentine's Day with Steve, and she felt guilty about wanting to be with Cal in San Francisco. But the truth was, she wanted to be with Cal, not Steve, for the time being.
“Why don't you come over and hang out tonight? I'll rent some videos and we can make popcorn,” he suggested.
“Do you want me to bring the videos?” she offered as she put her work into her briefcase. But she seemed to be taking less and less work home on the weekends. She was spending time with him instead, and not really in the mood to do “homework.”
“Sure, you bring the videos. I'll make dinner for us after the kids eat,” he volunteered. It sounded good to both of them, and Meredith tried not to think of what they were doing. They were living a fantasy that felt good now, but it couldn't go on forever, particularly once Steve found a job and moved to California. No matter how they avoided it now, eventually they knew they'd have to face it. But not yet, she told herself. Not yet. What she was sharing with Cal was too sweet to abandon. She knew it was selfish of her but she couldn't bring herself to break it off yet, no matter how guilty she felt about Steven.
“I'll come over in a couple of hours,” she promised. She wanted to take a bath, and relax, and give him some time with his children before she joined him. She didn't want to wear out her welcome with them.
She drove home to the furnished apartment she was still living in. She still hadn't found a house she liked, and she was spending less time working on it. She'd been busy, and as long as Steve was still in New York, she couldn't see the point of living in the city. And she wanted to stay in Palo Alto to be near Cal now. He had told her she could keep the apartment she had for as long as she wanted.
She let herself into her apartment with her key, and as she walked in, she suddenly had an odd feeling. She sensed, more than saw anything different. There was just an eerie feeling as she walked into her living room, and set down her briefcase, and as she did, Steve walked out of her bedroom with a huge bouquet of flowers. She nearly jumped a foot when she saw him. The last thing she expected was to see Steve there.
“What are you doing here?” she said, as though he were an intruder, and he looked at her with an odd expression, as he walked toward her with the flowers.
“I thought you'd be happy to see me,” he said, looking disappointed.
“I am.” She covered her tracks immediately, and moved toward him. “I just … I didn't expect … you said you were working this weekend.”
“I wanted to surprise you,” he said, setting the flowers down on the coffee table. He put his arms around her then, and she prayed that he wouldn't sense any resistance. She hadn't seen him since things had changed with Cal, and she was desperately afraid that he might sense it. But she was sure he didn't when he kissed her. “Happy Valentine's Day, Merrie,” he said happily, pleased with what he'd accomplished. It had been obvious from her expression that she didn't expect him, and her mind was racing.
“What a great surprise!” she said valiantly, and he didn't tell her it had been Anna's suggestion.
“I figured it was easier for me to come out than to get you away from your work here. You'd better be free this weekend. I want to take you out to dinner tomorrow.” So did Cal, she thought almost the moment he said it. But that was impossible now. She had to spend Valentine's Day with her husband. As long as he had gone to the trouble to come out, she knew she had to spend every moment with him. And it seemed like something of a mixed blessing to her. “So what'll we do tonight?” he beamed at her. He knew what was at top of his list, but after that, he was thinking of taking her to dinner or a movie.
“I don't know. Why don't we just stay here?” She felt completely disoriented, and for some odd reason, she felt as though she were entertaining a stranger. Having slept with Cal, she felt as though her whole life was out of balance.
“I can cook if you want,” Steve offered, “or we can order a pizza.”
“Sure, sweetheart,” she said amiably, “whatever you want. You must be exhausted.” At least she hoped so, but he looked surprisingly refreshed, despite the time difference and the endless string of days he'd been working.
“I slept on the plane, I feel great actually.” He put his arms around her again then, “I've really missed you.” They hadn't seen each other in five weeks, and for three weeks she had allowed herself the delusion that he no longer existed. But he was all too real now.
“I've missed you too,” she lied, feeling flustered and awkward as she moved his flowers to the dining room table, and thanked him. But as he watched her, he didn't know why, but he sensed that something was different between them. Maybe it was the surprise, and she hadn't had time to absorb it.
“How was your week?” he asked casually.
“Okay.”
“It sounds like you've been working day and night since Hawaii.” He'd called her, but she had hardly ever answered, and she'd only spoken to him from the office, because Cal had been there every evening.
“I've been pretty busy,” she said vaguely.
“Why don't I take a shower, and we can relax for a while,” he said with a smile. She knew what that meant. Sometimes when they'd been apart for awhile, making love got them back on track and comfortable with each other again, but this time, at the thought of it, she felt panicked.
“I'd love that, but I've got one bit of bad news.” She actually blushed as she said it, for a variety of reasons.
“What's that?” He looked momentarily worried.
“It's the wrong time of the month for hot romance….” She tried to let him come to his own conclusions.
“You've got your period?” She nodded. It wasn't true, but she suddenly realized that she didn't want to deal with the physical aspects of her double life, and their complicated situation. She hadn't had time to prepare herself for what it would mean when she next saw him. “That's no big deal,” he smiled at her. “It never used to bother us when we were in college, did it?” She looked stunned and felt trapped when he said it. “If we're going to live on separate coasts, we're going to have to take what comes, if you'll pardon the pun, when we do see each other.”