It is strange, the things I’ve done to the inside of my own head. In one way or another, that is where all magic is; that is what all magic is, and that is why it is magic—you treat the contents of your skull as if they were a sort of world that you can walk around in, filled with objects that you can manipulate; creatures with whom you can communicate; landscapes that you can observe. This bit of witchcraft is a narrow stream, and you dip your feet in it and splash. This piece of sorcery is a lever you can move stones with, and you grunt and sweat until it moves and you feel the satisfaction of watching it roll down a hill. And the invocation was a chat with a Demon Goddess who bore only the most passing and coincidental relationship to the being I had met, who had from time to time aided me, and who had used and was using me for purposes I was only beginning to have a glimmering of.
The conversation was strictly one-sided; how could it not be, being a creation of myself with myself. One-sided, yet (and here is the magic) it must have done something, because as stood upon that world whose air was nearly unbreathable, in that room whose contents were nearly unknowable, doing things to my head that are nearly indescribable, feeling a connection within me in a language almost untranslatable, there appeared before my real eyes a hint of red and golden sparks generated by nothing, that shimmered there for a moment, until they took
shape, solidified, and became the Goddess herself, who appeared standing, tall,composed, and with a wry look, and she said, “Well, I’m here. Now you must tell me, are you traitors, or fools?” 11. Disagreements with Deities
All sorts of replies came to mind, but I managed to hold them back. Letting Morrolan and Aliera deal with her would be more fun.
The Goddess stood taller than Morrolan, and glared down at him. He put on his supercilious look and seemed unimpressed with her glare; if it was an act, it was a good one, and if it wasn’t he had a remarkable amount of confidence in himself. Or he was a complete fool, which I’d suspected for some years. Or, at any rate, a Dragonlord, which is much the same thing.
He said, “You believe they planned all this, Verra? That they wanted you here? Fine. So what? Sethra believes—”
“Sethra,” said the Goddess scornfully.
It had never occurred to me that I might one day hear “Sethra” pronounced scornfully; that would have to count as the big shocker for the day.
Morrolan shrugged. Aliera said, “Sorry if you were inconvenienced, Mother, but we were tired of waiting around.”
“It isn’t a matter of convenience, my dear. It is a matter of permitting them to bring me to a place where they can destroy me.”
Morrolan said, “Most of a day, I believe.” I stared at Morrolan for a second, trying to figure out how that made sense in regard to anything, then decided not to try.
“I shan’t let them,” said Aliera.
Verra said, “You shan’t let them?”
“That is correct.”
“My darling Aliera—”
Teldra cleared her throat, and instantly had everyone’s attention. She said, “Our apologies, Goddess, if we have been precipitate. But may I beg you to tell us, now that we have acted, what we ought to do?”
The Goddess smiled, as one might at a kitten rolling on the floor playing with a piece of string. She said, “Ah, my little Issola. How sweet. Well, I will answer your question. First, we—” She stopped in midsentence, stared at something over Teldra’s shoulder, and said something that sounded like, “kyrancteur!”
At first I thought it was an exclamation in some foreign language, or else she’d suddenly recognized a friend who was invisible to the rest of us, but then Morrolan said, “Yes. Or trellanstone, if you prefer; that is the name we have always known it by.”
“How could it have come to this place?”
“It is,” said Morrolan. “With Vlad’s help, using an old invocation,” which, in case you didn’t notice, made no sense at all.
Verra didn’t seem bothered by the non sequitur. “I see,” she-said slowly. I looked up at her bony face, with its slightly askew forehead, and strange jawline, and deep-set eyes, and the thought suddenly came to me: She’s scared.
I found myself thinking, Dear Verra, protect us, before I caught myself. She glanced at me, and a smile flickered briefly around her lips, then went out. She turned her eyes once more to the trellanstone. Presently she asked, “What was it, exactly, that Sethra said?”
Morrolan cleared his throat, started to answer, stopped, and finally said, “There was a great deal of military theory in it.”
“That doesn’t astonish me,” said the Goddess.
“I might summarize it by saying that complex enemy plans are the easiest to defeat, and we shouldn’t be afraid of walking into a trap.”
“Uh huh. What else?”
“She reminded me that they can be killed.”
“So can we all.”
Morrolan shrugged. “I have never liked giving up the initiative.”
“Nor I,” I muttered under my breath, earning me a quick glance from the Goddess, who evidently had very good hearing.
“And yet, my love,” said Verna to Morrolan, “we are here, on their world, and they can appear if and when they wish, so they have the initiative. And if little Sethra is that certain, why isn’t she here herself?”
“Mother,” said Aliera. “You know the answer to that very well.”
Verra gave her an indulgent smile. “Perhaps I do.”
“I don’t,” I remarked, but they all ignored me.
“Moreover,” continued Aliera, “you also know, I am certain, that if you hadn’t wanted to come, you wouldn’t have. You are no demon to be summoned and dismissed, and no one here except perhaps our Easterner could take you for one.”
“Could I have refused a plea for help from my daughter?”
Aliera snorted. “Easily.”
Verra chuckled. “My darling child, you don’t know me as well, perhaps, as you think you do.”
Morrolan said, “It is the only means we have of learning,” which made no sense whatsoever; I was starting to get used to that though.
Aliera herself didn’t deign to respond. The Goddess spread her arms and gave Morrolan an exaggerated bow. “Very well, then,” she said. “You have summoned me, and I am here. What, exactly, is your plan?”
Aliera and Morrolan looked at each other.
After an embarrassing moment, Verra said, “You don’t have a plan?”
“Not exactly,” said Morrolan.
“Plans are overrated,” I said. “Let’s just start killing things. If there’s nothing else around, we can always kill each other.”
“Don’t tempt me,” said Morrolan.
I snorted. Verra said, “Perhaps you should allow the three of us to confer, my dear Easterner.”
“Sure,” I said. “I’ll just amuse myself by exchanging sarcastic comments with Loiosh.”
“No doubt you will,” she said.
Lady Teldra was standing across the room, as calm and patient as an issola, as if waiting for some call that hadn’t come. She had taken herself away from the conversation while no one was watching. I reflected on what a fine skill it would be to know when you weren’t wanted at a place you didn’t want to be, so you could make everyone happy by going away. I walked over to her. She looked up at me, a slightly quizzical expression on her face. I said, “How do you do that, Teldra?”
She smiled and raised her eyebrows, and came as close to looking smug as I’d ever seen her.