“That’s the way it has to be.” His voice was flat, leaving no room for further discussion.
She looked as if she might say more, but thankfully left it at that. Coming up to him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tight. He could feel the slight bulge of her tummy against him, reminding him that at least part of his family was happy. “I’m making fried chicken for supper. There’s plenty if you want to drop by.” Pushing away, she smiled at him. “I promise we won’t lecture or ask questions. I’m just worried about you.”
He felt like an ungrateful wretch. “I know.” Leaning down, he kissed her forehead. “But there is nothing to worry about and you need to be concerned about yourself and my niece or nephew.” He patted her tummy, making her laugh.
“It’s your job to worry about me and it’s mine to worry about you.” She headed for the door. “If you don’t show up for supper, I’ll bring you some leftovers tomorrow.”
“Good deal.” He walked out to the porch and leaned against the railing, watching as she climbed in her truck and left. It was closing in on the end of September and Emerald had been gone for more than three weeks. The harvest was in full swing, with the bulk of it done. He was on the homestretch and things looked good for the farm. He owned the land as far as his eye could see. This should be the best time of his life.
Instead, there was a never-ending ache deep inside him. It had taken him a while to figure out exactly what it was. It plagued him throughout the day as he tried to work himself into exhaustion and late at night when he tried to sleep. As he lay awake in bed night after night, it had finally occurred to him that he was lonely. And not in the way he’d been when Erin and Nathan had moved out. This went straight to the very marrow of his bones.
He missed Emerald.
He missed her smile, the way she nibbled on her bottom lip when she was thinking about something. He missed talking to her, sharing small moments of his day and listening as she shared hers. He missed walking into the house in the evening and smelling supper mingling with the soft scent of her perfume. His arms ached to hold her at night and many times he rolled over in his sleep, reaching for her only to awaken when she wasn’t there.
He loved her.
There was an empty hole where his heart had been. He still worked and functioned, but the joy was gone from life. She’d taken it with her when she’d driven away. Or when he’d driven her away, a voice in the back of his head reminded him. He’d wondered a million times if she would have stayed if he’d asked. But then, he’d remind himself that she needed to go back to her old life. The time they’d had together had all but been forced upon her by circumstance. Jackson needed to be sure that what she felt was real.
He’d already decided that once the harvest was done, he needed to make a trip to New York to visit the gallery that handled his photographs. He planned to call on Emerald while he was there. Maybe take her to dinner and talk.
Groaning, he buried his face in his hands. Truthfully, he wanted to swoop into New York, kidnap her and drag her back out here with him. “You’ll be lucky if she even wants to see you,” he muttered as he raised his head. Now that she was back to her old life it would be very easy for her to forget all about him.
He’d been thinking about the trip to New York since Emerald had left, but what had sealed his fate had been the arrival of his photos from the developer. He’d sent several rolls, including the ones he’d taken of Emerald that day at the pond.
When he’d first seen them it had been like being hit in the head with a two-by-four. Sexy, mischievous and all woman, she’d stared back at him. The light and shadows had played over her creamy skin, making him want to touch it. He’d spent hours looking at her heart-shaped face, dark brown eyes and curly black hair. Wet and sleek, she was like some mystical creature come to touch the mortal realm and share some of her magic.
That’s what she’d done to him. She’d touched something deep within him and he knew he’d never be the same. So no matter what happened, he knew he had to take the chance and go to New York. If he didn’t try, he’d never be able to live with himself.
Pushing away from the railing, he raised his arms over his head, his muscles bunching and straining against the seams of his T-shirt. It was time to get back to work. The quicker the harvest was completely finished, the faster he’d get to New York. He only hoped that Mother Nature cooperated.
As he stepped off the porch, he heard a vehicle approaching. He swore under his breath, praying it wasn’t another well-meaning member of his family. All of them had taken to dropping by at odd hours to check on him. As much as he appreciated their concern, it was starting to drive him insane.
He squinted as a car came into view, not recognizing it at first. His heart stopped and then began to pound the closer it got. Cold sweat rolled down his back. It couldn’t be, but it was. The vehicle pulled to a stop and the door opened. As if he’d conjured her with his thoughts alone, Emerald stepped out and closed the door.
“Hello, Jackson.”
Emerald couldn’t stop staring at him. After not seeing him for over three weeks, she wanted to soak up everything about him. He looked just as she remembered—good enough to eat.
He was tanned and fit and strong. He hadn’t changed at all. Or so she thought until she took several steps closer. Then she saw the truth. There were new lines around the corners of his eyes and dark circles beneath them. He hadn’t been sleeping any better than she had. That gave her hope that maybe he’d missed her as much as she’d missed him.
His mouth thinned into a firm line and his fists clenched at his sides. Not exactly the reception she’d been hoping for, but she wasn’t giving up. She was here and she was committed to her course of action. He would listen to her. She’d make him.
“Emerald.” Like a man in a trance, he took a step toward her and then jerked himself to a halt. “Why are you here?”
This was it. This was the moment she’d come all this way for. “We have some unfinished business between us.”
Now he appeared perplexed. His eyebrows furrowed and he frowned. “What business?”
“Do you mind if we sit?”
He stepped back and motioned her forward. She didn’t bother going to the door. Instead she went to the swing and lowered herself onto the bench seat. Jackson didn’t sit next to her, but perched on the railing instead. Crossing his arms over his chest, he stared at her, looking cool and aloof. But she could see beyond the façade. The loneliness in his eyes mirrored what she saw in her own daily.
“What was so important you came all this way instead of just calling or e-mailing?”
Her back stiffened and she glared at him. If she didn’t love him so much, she’d be tempted to smack him for acting so obtuse. “You know darn well why I’m here.”
His eyes widened and he straightened. “Why don’t you tell me?”
The low cadence of his voice made her shiver. It reminded her of all the times they’d made love and he’d whispered in her ear, praising her, telling her how much he enjoyed touching her. She shivered and ignored the fact that her nipples were hard nubs and her panties were already wet.
“I love you.” She’d meant to talk a bit more and maybe bring the subject around to them, but the words had just come out of her.
He appeared shocked. All the color seemed to drain from his face, leaving him pale, which was amazing considering the golden hue of his tanned skin. The blue of his eyes seemed to darken to the color of a summer storm the longer he stared at her. “What did you say?”
“I said that I love you.” Rising, she went to him, standing so close that she could feel the heat from his body even though they weren’t quite touching. “I didn’t want to go. I want to stay here with you.”