“My father had it made for my mother at Garrard’s when they got engaged. It’s a very, very fine stone, and an old one. And she wanted you to have it.”
“This is your mother’s engagement ring?” She looked at him with tear-filled eyes.
“It is. She wants you to have it. We talked about it for a long time, and I was going to buy you a new one, but she wanted you to have this one. She can’t wear it anymore anyway, since she’s had arthritis.”
“Oh, William …” It was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, and she held out her hand and flashed it in the dim light. It was an absolutely fabulous engagement ring, and Sarah had never been so happy in her entire life.
“That’s just to remind you who you belong to, when you get on that bloody ship tomorrow, and go so damn far away I can’t bear to think about it at all. I’m going to be calling you every hour in New York until I get there.”
“Why don’t you come over early?” She was looking at the ring as she said it, and he smiled. He was pleased that she obviously loved it, and he knew his mother would be pleased too. It had been an incredibly generous gesture on her part.
“Actually, I might. I was thinking about October, but I’ve got so damn much to do here. I’ll have to see what’s happening with the farm by then.” There had been some problems he still had to work out, and he had to make an appearance at the House of Lords before he left London. “In any case, I’ll be there by die first of November without fail. I’m sure you’ll be half mad by then with plans for the wedding. And I’ll get in everyone’s hair, but I don’t give a damn. I can’t wait to see you any longer than that.” He kissed her longingly then, and the two of them almost forgot themselves as they lay on the couch, and he ran long, hungry fingers along her exquisite body. “Oh, Sarah … God …” She could feel him throbbing for her, but she wanted to wait until their wedding. She wanted this to be like the first time, as though there had been no other wedding, and no Freddie. If William had been the first man in her life, they would have waited, and so she wanted to now, except that there were moments like this one when she almost forgot that. Her legs moved aside, gently welcoming him, and he moved toward her powerfully, and then he forced himself to pull away from her and stood up with a groan of regret, but he wanted to wait, too, out of respect for her and their marriage. “Maybe it’s a good thing you’re leaving,” he said huskily as he walked around the room trying to calm his senses, and she stood up looking dishevelled and passionate as she nodded at him. And then suddenly, she laughed at him. They both looked like overheated children.
“Aren’t we awful?”
“Not really.” He laughed. “I can hardly wait.”
“Neither can I,” she confessed.
And then he asked her something he knew he shouldn’t. “Was it … was it ever like this … with him?” His voice was deep and sexual as he asked her, but he had wanted to know that for a long time. She had said she hadn’t loved him, but he always wondered a little about the rest.
Sarah shook her head slowly and sadly. “No, it wasn’t. It was empty … and without feeling…. Darling, he never loved me, and I know now that I never loved him. There has never been a love in my life like ours. … I have never loved, or lived, or even existed until you found me. And from now until I die, you will be my only love.” There were tears in his eyes this time when he kissed her. But this time, he didn’t let it go too far, and feeling happier than he had in his entire life, he left her until the next morning.
She lay awake for most of that night, thinking of him, and admiring her engagement ring in the dark. And the next morning, she called the Duchess of Whitfield to tell her how much the ring meant to her, how grateful she was to have it, and how much she loved William.
“That’s all that matters, dear. But jewels are always such fun, aren’t they? Have a safe trip … and a beautiful wedding.”
Sarah thanked her and finished her packing, and William met them an hour later in the lobby. She was wearing a white wool Chanel suit, made especially for her in Paris by Coco Chanel, and her smashing new engagement ring, and William almost devoured her when he kissed her. He hadn’t forgotten the desire she had aroused in him as they lay on the couch in her suite the night before, and he wished he were going with them on the Queen Mary. “I imagine your father is glad I’m not.”
“I think he’s been very impressed by your exemplary behavior.”
“Well, he wouldn’t be for long,” William groaned privately. “I think I’ve about reached my limit.” She grinned and they held hands as they followed her parents into his Bentley. He had volunteered to drive them to Southampton, and their luggage was going on ahead. But the two-hour drive went much too quickly. Sarah saw the familiar shape of the Queen Mary again, remembering how different things had been when they sailed from New York only two months before.
“You never know what life has in store for you.” Edward smiled benevolently at them, and offered to show William around the ship. But William was far more interested in staying close to Sarah, and he politely declined the invitation. Instead, he went to their staterooms with them, and then they went out on the deck. He stood there with an arm around her and a woebegone face until the last gong sounded and the last smokestack had roared to life, and he suddenly found himself terrified that they would meet some disaster. A cousin of his had been on the Titanic twenty-six years before, and he couldn’t bear thinking of anything happening to Sarah.
“Please God … take care of yourself. … I couldn’t live without you …” He clung to her like a life raft for their last moments.
“I’ll be fine, I promise. Just come to New York as soon as you can.”
“I will. Possibly by next Tuesday,” he said sadly, and she smiled again, and tears filled her eyes as he kissed her again.
“I’m going to miss you so awfully,” she said softly.
“Me too.” He clung to her, and at last one of the officers approached them with awe.
“Your Grace, I apologize for the intrusion, but I’m afraid … we will be sailing very shortly. You must go ashore now.”
“Right. Sorry.” He smiled apologetically. “Please take good care of my wife and her family, won’t you? My future wife, that is …” He beamed down at her, and the large, round diamond on her left hand glinted powerfully in the September sunshine.
“Of course, sir.” The officer looked impressed, and made a mental note to mention it to the captain. The future Duchess of Whitfield was travelling with them to New York, and there was no doubt that she would get every possible courtesy and, service.
“Take care, darling.” He kissed her one last time, shook hands with his future father-in-law, kissed Victoria warmly on the cheek and gave her a hug, and then he was down the gangplank. Sarah was crying in spite of herself, and even Victoria dabbed at her eyes with her hankie, it was so sweet to see them. He waved frantically from the shore until they could see him no more, and Sarah stood on the deck for two hours after they sailed, staring out to sea, as though if she tried hard enough she could still see him.
“Come downstairs now, Sarah,” her mother said gently. But there was nothing to mourn now. Only cause for celebration. And by the time Sarah got downstairs, there was a cable from William, and a bouquet of roses so large it barely fit through the door of her stateroom. “I can’t bear waiting another moment. I love you, William.” The card said, and her mother smiled, glancing at the beautiful engagement ring again. It was amazing to think what had happened to them in two short months. She could hardly believe it.