“Finished,” he said proudly, on their last weekend away. They were both anxious to get back to Washington. And the commission was meeting on Monday. “I can't believe it.”
“I can't wait to read it.”
“It's not exactly happy reading.”
“I don't expect it to be, but I'm sure it's wonderful.” She knew she had no right to be, but she was proud of him.
“I'll get you a clean copy as soon as it's retyped. I'm anxious for you to read it.” And then there was an odd silence. He wasn't sure how to say it to her, but he had been thinking a lot about her, and worrying about her constantly. “I'm anxious to see you too, Maddy. I've been worried sick about you.”
“Don't be. I'm fine. And I'm going to see Lizzie next weekend. She's coming to Washington to see me. I can't wait to introduce you to her. I've told her all about you.”
“I can't imagine what you'd say about me,” he sounded embarrassed. “I must seem like a prehistoric monument to her, and I'm not very exciting.”
“You are to me. You're my best friend, Bill.” She was closer to him than she had been to anyone in years, except Greg, who had a new girlfriend in New York, and still called when he could get through to her. But they had both figured out that when Jack took his calls, she never got the messages. And when he answered and she was there, he never put the calls through to her. She and Bill were more careful about the timing and circumstances of their phone calls.
“You're very special to me too,” Bill answered her, not knowing what to say. He was confused about his feelings for her, part daughter, part friend, part woman, in alternating combinations, and she felt the same way about him. Sometimes he seemed like a brother to her, and at other times, she was startled by her feelings for him. But neither of them had ever attempted to define it to the other. “Let's have lunch before the commission on Monday. Can you do that?”
“I'd love to.”
And she was even more confused by how nice Jack was to her over their last weekend in Virginia. He brought her flowers from the garden, and breakfast in bed, and went for walks with her, and told her how important she was to him. And when he made love to her now, he was kinder and gentler to her than he had ever been. It was as though the abuses of the past were a figment of her imagination. And she felt guilty again for the things she had said about him to Bill and Greg and Dr. Flowers, and she wanted to correct the bad impression she had left with them about her very loving husband. She was beginning to wonder if it was all her fault. Maybe she just brought out the worst in him. When he wanted to be, and when she was nice to him, he was such an incredibly sweet person.
She tried explaining it to Dr. Flowers the morning they got back, and Dr. Flowers sounded harsh to her when she issued a warning.
“Be careful, Maddy. Look at what you're doing. You're falling into his trap again. He knows what you were thinking, and he's making sure to prove you wrong, and to make you feel it's your fault.” She made it sound so Machiavellian that Maddy felt sorry for Jack as she listened. She had truly maligned him, and now Dr. Flowers believed her. But she didn't say anything about it to Bill when they had lunch, for fear he would say the same thing Dr. Flowers had. Instead, they talked about his book. He had already sold it to a publisher several months before, through an agent.
“What are your plans for the fall?” he asked her carefully, wanting to hear that she was leaving her husband. But she never mentioned it at lunch, and she looked happier and more relaxed than he had seen her since he'd known her. Something seemed to be going well, but he was just as worried about her. And like Dr. Flowers, he was afraid that Jack was going to lure her back into his trap, and keep her there forever, alternately abusing and confusing her until she could stand it no longer. But she said nothing about leaving to him.
“I want to try and get the show back on track. Our ratings have taken a sudden dive. I thought it was because of Brad, but Jack thinks I'm in a slump too, and my delivery isn't what it should be. He said my stories have been really boring. I want to research some specials to do this fall, and see if we can't put some zip back into it.” As usual, Jack was blaming her for something that wasn't her fault, Bill suspected, but she was more than willing to believe him. It wasn't that she was stupid. It was that she was mesmerized, and he was infinitely convincing. But unless one knew the pattern, it was difficult for people outside the inner circle to see it. And Maddy was too close to see.
Bill was tempted to call Dr. Flowers about it, after he and Maddy had lunch, but he knew that as ethical as she was, now that Maddy was her patient, Dr. Flowers wouldn't discuss her with him, and he understood that. He just had to sit and watch what was happening to her, and step in when he saw an opportunity to help her, but for the moment there was none. And once again he was reminded of Margaret, and his long months of waiting, to rescue her and bring her back to safety. What pained him most to remember was the outcome. And this time he didn't want to make the same mistake, and frighten the enemy by moving in. More than anyone, he knew that Jack was a formidable opponent, a terrorist of the utmost skill. And Bill wanted more than anything to save her. He just hoped he could do it this time.
The commission was moving ahead well, and they were talking about having more frequent meetings. The First Lady had brought six more people in, and they were devising a campaign for the fall, of ads against domestic violence and crimes against women. There were six different ads being worked on, and subgroups that were being formed. He and Maddy were on a subcommittee on rape, and the things they were learning were appalling. There was another subcommittee concentrating on murders, but neither he nor Maddy had wanted to be on it.
And the weekend after they both got back, Lizzie came to town again, and Maddy put her up at the Four Seasons. She invited Bill to have tea with them, and he was impressed when he met her. She was as beautiful as Maddy had said, and every bit as bright as her mother. And given the few advantages she'd had, she sounded surprisingly educated. She had been diligent about going to school, enjoyed her courses at the city college in Memphis, and she was obviously a voracious reader.
“I'd like to get her into Georgetown next term, if I can,” Maddy said to him, as they sat having tea in the lobby. And Lizzie said she was excited about it.
“I've got some connections that might be helpful there,” Bill volunteered. “What do you want to study?”
“Foreign policy, and communications,” Lizzie said without hesitation.
“I'd love to get her an internship at the network, but that's not possible,” Maddy said regretfully. She hadn't even told Jack Lizzie was there, and Maddy wasn't going to tell him about it. He was being so much nicer to her that she didn't want to upset him. He was talking about taking her back to Europe in October, but she hadn't told Bill yet. “If Lizzie comes to school here, we're going to get her a little apartment in Georgetown.”
“Make sure it's safe,” Bill said, looking worried. They had both been horrified by the statistics on rape they'd learned that week at the commission.
“Don't worry, I will,” Maddy nodded, thinking of the same thing. “She should probably have a roommate.” And when Lizzie went to powder her nose, Bill told Maddy how lovely he thought her.
“She's a terrific girl, you must be very proud of her,” he said smiling at Maddy.
“I am, though I have no right to be.” Maddy was taking her to the theater that night. She had told Jack she was going to a women's dinner related to the commission, and he wasn't pleased, but since it involved the First Lady, he understood.