“Monks have bald heads,” thought Brother Monkey, “and not even a louse could settle on one, let alone a bedbug. I think it must have been a trick by those Taoists to get the master killed. Hunh! Well, they haven't won yet, despite their cheating. I'll try a trick on them.” Monkey then flew up and landed on the head of one of the ceramic animals on the roof of the palace hall. He shook himself and turned into a poisonous centipede seven inches long that went straight for the Taoist and stung him in the nose. The Taoist could sit still no longer, and tumbling head over heels he fell off the platform and would probably have died had not the senior and junior officials saved him. The horrified king sent the royal tutor to take the Taoist to the Hall of Literary Splendor to comb his hair and clean himself up; meanwhile Monkey went up on his auspicious cloud to carry his victorious master down to before the steps of the throne hall.
The king ordered that Sanzang be allowed to leave the country, but the Great Immortal Deer Power made this submission: “Your Majesty, my elder brother has long suffered from rheumatism. The heavenly wind in that high place brought on a new attack of his illness, which was why the Buddhist monk won. Please keep him here so that I can compete with him at guessing objects through wooden boards?”
“What is guessing objects through wooden boards?” the king asked.
“This humble Taoist has the power of knowing what is on the other side of a board,” Deer Power replied, “and I would like to see whether that Buddhist monk can too. If he is better at guessing than I am, let him go. But if he is not then I hope Your Majesty will decide what crime he is guilty of, avenge us brothers, and not allow our twenty years of protecting the country to be sullied.”
The king was so utterly muddle-headed that he accepted this malicious suggestion and ordered that a red lacquered chest be carried by the eunuchs of the royal household into the harem, where his queen was told to put one of her treasures inside. The chest was carried out and set in front of the steps of the throne hall a few moments later. “Your two faiths must each compete with your magical powers in guessing what treasure is in the chest,” he told the Buddhist and the Taoist.
“Disciple,” asked Sanzang, “how can I tell what is inside?”
Monkey put his cloud away, turned himself back into the smallest of insects, landed on Sanzang's face and said, “Don't worry, master. I'll go and take a look.” The splendid Great Sage flew over to the chest, crawled under its legs, and saw a crack between the boards through which he squeezed inside. Here he saw a red lacquer tray in which was placed a set of court robes: a mountain, river and state jacket and a heaven, earth and land skirt. He picked them up, shook and crumpled them, bit the tip of his tongue, sprayed a mouthful of blood over them, called “Change!” and turned them into a worn-out cloak into which he pissed before crawling out through the crack between the boards. He then flew back to the Tang Priest's ear and said, “Master, say that it's a worn-out cloak.”
“But he told me to guess what treasure is inside,” said the Tang Priest. “What sort of treasure is an old cloak?”
“Never mind about that,” said Monkey. “Just make that guess.” The Tang Priest stepped forward and was just about to state his guess when Deer Power said, “I shall make the first guess. The chest contains a mountain, river and state jacket and a heaven, earth and land skirt.”
“No,” said the Tang Priest, “it does not. The chest contains a rotten cloak.”
“That monk is being outrageous,” said the king. “He has the effrontery to suggest that our country has no treasures by guessing that it contains a tattered old cloak. Execute him!”
The two groups of guards officers were just about to fall upon the Tang Priest when he called out desperately, “Your Majesty, spare me for a moment while the chest is opened for you to look inside. If there really is a treasure there I shall accept my punishment; but if there is not you would be doing me an injustice.” The king then ordered that the chest be opened, and when the officials in attendance on him opened it and lifted out the red tray he saw that there really was a putrid old cloak on it.
“Who put that there?” asked the king in a great fury.
The queen then slipped forward from behind the dragon throne to say, “My lord, I put the mountain, river and state jacket and the heaven, earth and land skirt inside myself. I don't know how they can have turned into that.”
“You may retire, good wife,” said the king. “I believe you. All the things used in the harem are of the finest silks and gauzes. We would never have anything like that.” He then ordered that the chest be carried up to him so that he could put a treasure inside it himself for another test.
The king then went into the harem, picked a peach as big as a bowl from the magic peach tree in the palace gardens, placed it in the chest and had it carried down for the two of them to guess what it was.
“Disciple,” said the Tang Priest, “I have to guess again.”
“Don't worry,” said Monkey, “I'll take another look.” Once more he buzzed over, went in through the same crack, and saw a peach that was just to his liking. He turned back into himself and ate the peach clean up as he sat in the chest, nibbling every single piece of it, including the damaged parts of the skin, and leaving the stone there when he turned back into the tiniest of insects and flew back to land on Sanzang's ear. “Master,” he said, “guess that it's a peach stone.”
“Don't make a fool of me, disciple,” said Sanzang. “If I hadn't spoken up fast just now I would have been executed. This time I must guess that it is something precious, and there is nothing precious about a peach stone.”
“Don't be afraid,” said Monkey. “All that matters is winning.”
Before Sanzang could speak the Great Immortal Antelope Power said, “I shall make the first guess. It is a magic peach.”
“It is not a peach, only a peach stone,” said Sanzang.
“But we put the peach in there ourself,” said the king. “It could not possibly be only a stone. The Third Teacher of the Nation is right.”
“Your Majesty,” put in Sanzang, “open the chest up and look.”
Once more the officials in attendance carried the chest up to be opened, lifted out the dish, and revealed only a stone with no skin or flesh, a sight that shocked the king.
“Teachers of the Nation,” he said, “stop competing with him and let him go. We put the magic peach in there with our own hands. If there is only a stone there now, who can have eaten it? He must have gods or demons helping him in secret.”
When Pig heard this he said to Friar Sand with a touch of a sarcastic grin, “The king doesn't realize that Monkey is an expert when it comes to eating peaches.”
As he was saying this the Great Immortal Tiger Power came back into the throne hall after combing his hair and washing himself in the Hall of Literary Splendor. “Your Majesty,” he said, “this monk has the art of shifting and changing things. Have the chest brought up here. I will break his magic and have another divination contest with him.”
“What do you want to guess now?” the king asked.
“Magic can change only things, not people,” said Tiger Power. “Hide this boy Taoist in the chest, and I guarantee that the monk will not be able to change him.” The boy got inside, the lid was put on, and the chest carried down.
“Guess what treasure is inside it this third time, monk,” the king said.