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Eyes bulged like bells to rival the Evil Star:

Hands held an iron mace like Mahadeva.

When Monkey saw the evil spirit he acted towards him in an offhand way, showing no trace of respect, but looking away and keeping on hitting his gong. “So you're back, are you?” said the demon king. Monkey did not reply.

“Gocome,” the demon king asked again, “you're back, are you?” Still Monkey did not reply. The demon king then went over to him, grabbed him and said, “Why are you still beating your gong now you're back home? And why don't you answer when I ask you a question?”

“What do you mean by your 'Why? Why? Why?'“ Monkey replied.

“I told you I didn't want to go but you insisted. When I got there I saw huge numbers of foot soldiers and cavalry drawn up in order of battle. As soon as I was spotted they shouted, 'Seize the demon! Seize the demon!' They pushed and shoved and dragged and carried me into the city, where I saw their king. He told them to cut my head off, but luckily his two groups of advisers said that in international conflicts envoys should not be executed, so I was spared. They took the declaration of war, marched me out of the city, gave me thirty strokes in front of their army, and let me come back here to report. Before long they'll be here to fight you.”

“In other words,” the monster said, “you had a bad time. I don't blame you for refusing to answer when I asked you those questions.”

“It wasn't that,” said Monkey. “The reason I didn't answer was because of the pain.”

“How strong are their forces?” the demon king asked.

“I was reeling from shock and too badly frightened by the beating to be able to count them,” Monkey replied. “All I could see were masses of weapons drawn up there:

Bows and arrows, spears and sabers, suits of armor,

Dagger-axes, halberds, swords and tasseled banners.

Pikes, partisans, helmets,

Axes, round shields, and iron caltrops.

Long staves,

Short cudgels,

Steel forks, cannons and casques.

They were wearing tall boots, hats and quilted jackets,

And carrying cudgels, small pellet-bows and maces of bronze.”

“That's neither here nor there,” laughed the demon king when he heard this. “Weapons like that can be finished off in a single blaze. Go and tell the Golden Queen all about it and ask her not to upset herself. Ever since she heard me lose my temper this morning and decide to go to war she's been crying her eyes out. Tell her that their army is so fierce and brave that they're bound to beat us. That'll calm her down for a while.”

This delighted Monkey, who thought, “Just what I want.” Watch him as he goes the way he knows, through the side door and across the hall. Inside there were tall buildings: it was not like outside. He went straight to the women's quarters at the back, where he saw from a distance a handsome and decorated doorway. That was where the Golden Queen lived. When he went to see her there were two groups of fox and deer spirits dressed like beautiful women to wait on her. The queen sat in the middle with her fragrant cheeks in her hands and tears pouring from both of her eyes. Indeed, she had

A beautiful face so soft and charming,

A bewitching countenance so fair.

But her raven-black hair was uncombed

And piled untidily on her head;

She did not want to dress up

And wore no hair ornaments or rings.

Her face was unpowdered,

And she wore no rouge.

Her hair was not oiled

But all in a tangle.

She pouted her cherry lips,

Ground her silver teeth,

Frowned with her brows like moth antennae,

And let her eyes sparkle with tears.

All her heart

Was filled with memories of Purpuria's king;

All the time

She longed to escape from the net that held her.

Truly,

Ill-fated have been many lovely ladies

Left in their wordless grief to face the Eastern wind.

Monkey went up to her and greeted her with a “Hello.”

“You impudent boorish freak,” said the queen. “I remember how when I was living in splendor with my king in Purpuria even the king's tutor and the prime minister had to prostrate themselves in the dust when they met me: they would never have dared look me in the face. How dare you say 'Hello' to me, you lout? Where are you from, you coarse beast?”

“Please don't be angry, ma'am,” the serving women said. “He's one of His Majesty's most trusted lieutenants. His name is Gocome. He was the one who was sent with the declaration of war this morning.”

At this the queen controlled her temper and asked, “Did you go inside Purpuria when you delivered the declaration?”

“I took it straight to the capital and right into the throne hall,” said Monkey. “I saw the king himself and got an answer from him.”

“What did the king say when you saw him?” the queen asked.

“I have already told His Majesty here what he said about war and about the dispositions of their forces,” Monkey replied. “But there was also a private message from the king, who misses you, ma'am. There's something private I have come to report to you, but with all these attendants around this is no place to talk.”

When the queen heard this she dismissed her foxes and deer. Brother Monkey shut the door of the palace, rubbed his face, and turned back into himself. “Don't be afraid of me,” he said to her. “I'm a monk sent by the Great Tang in the East to see the Buddha and fetch the scriptures at the Thunder Monastery in India. My master is Tang Sanzang, the younger brother of the Tang Emperor. I'm Sun Wukong, his senior disciple. When we were in your capital to present our passport for approval I saw a notice calling for doctors that your king and his ministers had posted. Then I used my medical skills to cure the illness he had contracted from missing you. When we were drinking at the banquet he gave to thank me he told me that you had been carried off by the evil spirit. As I can subdue dragons and tigers I was specially invited to capture the demon, rescue you and take you back to your country. I was the one who defeated the vanguard and killed the little devil. When I saw from outside the gates how ferocious the demon king was I turned myself into Gocome's double and came here to bring you a message.”

The queen said nothing when she heard this. Then Monkey produced the bracelets and presented them to her with both hands.

“If you don't believe me, just look; where did these come from?” he asked.

As soon as she saw them the queen burst into tears, came down from where she was sitting, bowed to him in thanks and said, “Reverend sir, if you really can save me and get me back to court I will remember my deep debt of gratitude to you even when I'm old and toothless.”

“Let me ask you something,” said Monkey. “What treasure does he use to produce that fire, smoke and sand?”

“It's no treasure,” the queen said, “just three golden bells. As soon as he shakes the first one three thousand feet of burning flames shoot out. When he shakes the second one a three-thousand-foot column of smoke gushes out to kipper people. And when he shakes it the third time a blinding three-thousand-foot sandstorm blows up. The fire and smoke are nothing much, but the sand is lethal. If it gets up your nostrils it can kill you.”

“It's terrible,” Monkey said, “terrible. I've experienced it and I had to sneeze a couple of times. I wonder where he keeps the bells.”

“He never puts them down,” the queen replied. “He keeps them at his waist whether he's going somewhere, staying at home, sitting down or sleeping. They are always with him.”

“If you still care for Purpuria and want to see your king again you must forget about your distress and grief for the moment,” said Monkey. “Make yourself look attractive and happy. Talk to him like a loving wife and get him to give you the bells to look after. When I've stolen them and defeated the monster I'll take you back to be reunited with your royal husband so that you can live in peace together.”