What's that, Brother? A bishop wrestling? Well, he did. And do you know what he'd say? He'd say that if it was good enough for Jacob, it was good enough for him. I couldn't figure out any way to argue against that, and I'll bet you won't, either.
Anyhow, Constantine and the rest of the churchmen from Rome had a fine old time in Constantinople. They'd visit a new church or two every day, and at night- ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies, Brother Elpidios.
Some of them were downright disappointed when Cyrus's messengers finally tracked down Justinian. Sure enough, he was in Nikaia, on his way from Kyzikos down to Nikomedeia. He sent the messenger who'd caught up with him back to Constantinople with a letter telling Pope Constantine to meet him in Nikomedeia.
Off went the pope. Off went the bishops and priests who'd come along with him. They were getting what they'd come all the way from Rome for, and do you know what? Most of 'em really did look as if they could have waited another couple of weeks to have it.
JUSTINIAN
My expeditionary forces against Kherson being nearly ready to sail, the arrival of Pope Constantine in the imperial city proved more nearly a nuisance, an interruption to that important business, than anything else. But, having granted him leave to come, I could hardly refuse to treat with him once his journey was completed.
Nikomedeia made a good enough place for the two of us to meet. Although damaged by Arab and Persian invaders, it has been repaired and refortified, its hilltop stronghold being especially difficult to capture. And the harbor there, though not large, is well sheltered from the elements.
Constantine, however, chose to travel by land. We met not far outside the wall. He dismounted from the post-horse lent him, approached me, and prostrated himself as any other Roman subject would have done. "Emperor, I thank you for calling me to the Queen of Cities," he said in a Greek rather harsh.
He being no ordinary Roman subject, I waited until he had risen and then prostrated myself before him in turn. "Holy Bishop of Rome, I thank you for coming here and restoring perfect peace in the church," I replied, rising myself.
We beamed at each other. I would have treated Felix of Ravenna harshly in any case, and was glad to see myself reaping such a large profit thereby. Constantine said, "Even this small city of Nikomedeia bustles with such activity as is rarely seen in Italy and the other western regions."
You are in a civilized land now, I thought, but did not say as much out loud. What I did say was, "I am glad Romania pleases the bishop of Rome"- a subtler reminder of the same thing.
Constantine said, "I, for my part, am glad we have been able to agree on the canons of the holy synod you summoned twenty years ago, and that you recognize the need for abandoning the thirty-sixth, which is odious in the eyes of the episcopal successors of Saint Peter."
Few of the bishops under the jurisdiction of the patriarchate of Constantinople would have dared be so free-spoken with me. Indeed, Constantine took his prerogatives as seriously as I took mine. "I have been persuaded that canons from two previous ecumenical synods cover the same ground, yes," I replied, yielding his immediate point but not the larger issue.
The immediate point sufficed. "Let us rejoice in our peace and unity," Constantine said. "If I celebrate the divine liturgy here, Emperor, will you take of the Lord's body and blood from my hands?"
"I should be honored," I replied; I should have been slighted had he made no such suggestion. "The church of the Holy Wisdom is the finest in Nikomedeia."
Constantine's face lit up. "I have seen the church of the Holy Wisdom in Constantinople. If this one is anywhere near so fine-"
"Hardly," I said, laughing. "No church I have ever seen comes close to the great church in the Queen of Cities."
"God forbid that I should disagree," Constantine exclaimed, "lest I be revealed in His eyes as a liar."
"The church of the Holy Wisdom here is no mean hovel," I assured him, "and of course the presence of the pope of Rome ornaments any church." We smiled at each other, both of us intent on wringing maximum advantage from our meeting. I went on, "Nikomedeia's other accommodations should also suit you, even if they prove less splendid than those you enjoyed in Constantinople."
"I am sure I shall be contented here," he said. "I have had only comfortable lodgings and courteous dealings with Roman officials. Your governor Theophilos was particularly generous of his substance and his time."
"I am glad to hear he gave you the honor you deserve," I said. Theophilos, though not the brightest man God ever made, had shaped better as the commander of the Karabisianoi than I looked for on naming him to the post. Though relying on his advisers, he did not hesitate to overrule them when he judged them mistaken. More than that, one could hardly ask from any man.
I quartered the bishop of Rome and his followers in a wing of the hilltop stronghold in which I was also residing. He grew quite merry over wine. I said, "At the divine liturgy tomorrow, I want you to pray for the success of the fleet I am going to send against Kherson to avenge myself upon the rich merchants there."
"\a160'Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord,'\a160" he said, and then giggled. "Not mine, mine, but mine, the Lord's, you understand." Like a lot of men with a deal of wine in them, he was more precise than he needed to be.
"\a160'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.' The Lord says that, also," I reminded him.
"He doesn't say anything about a nose for a nose." The pope giggled again. I let him live, he being obviously drunk and I having in any case long since avenged myself upon Leontios, who wounded my nose. Constantine held up his hands, as if to make scales. "One passage here, one passage there. Which with more weight?" He shrugged. "Emperor, I did not come here to quarrel with you. I shall pray for your fleet."
"Good," I said. "For that, you and the church can keep all your privileges in Italy." He was effusively grateful, but giving him what he already had cost me nothing, whereas extracting more from him would have required troops and poisoned the ecclesiastical peace we were confirming here.
As the evening wore on, Constantine not only challenged one of my guardsmen to wrestle, he broke the fellow's collarbone. He was most contrite, and prayed over the excubitor afterwards, but poor Paul's arm is not all it should be even on the day I set down these words.
The bishop of Rome was somewhat the worse for wear the next morning, but did nonetheless celebrate the liturgy as we had arranged. Nor did he use the excuse of the previous night's drunkenness to evade the promise he had made there. Before everyone in Nikomedeia's church of the Holy Wisdom, he asked God's favor for my "expedition to punish the wicked Khersonites for their numerous sins."
When I came up to take the miraculous bread and wine from him, I said, "Pray also that I may be forgiven my sins."
"I shall, Emperor," he answered, "in the same breath I use to pray for the forgiveness of my own."
He stayed in Nikomedeia another few days, then set out for the distant and backwards west once more. Word recently came to me that he was stricken ill on his journey; I do not know whether he has reached Rome safely. If not, I shall have the nuisance of beginning afresh with a new pope once the matter of Kherson is settled.
Mauros, Stephen, and Helias were all sailing with that portion of the naval expedition departing from Constantinople, giving me the opportunity of reminding them one last time of their orders: "When you get to Kherson, put everyone you can catch there and in the cities nearby to the sword. Spare no one. They had scant mercy on me; I have none on them. Is it understood?"