And of course I brag about my two grandsons, whom I get to see quite often-they are Shasta's favorite visitors and who are the smartest and nicest kids I've ever known, with the possible exception of my own children. I'm proud of all of them.
I gave up the chairmanship to Klaus Villers. Despite his decree limiting the number of cats and dogs in the hospital to six per floor he is doing a far better job than I ever could have. Now, unencumbered by all administrative duties and the radio talk show and as much of the other extraneous baggage as possible, I spend my working hours with my patients, and most of my free time with my family. I no longer sing at the hospital Christmas party, but my wife insists I continue to do so in the shower-she says she can't sleep otherwise. We both know I'm no Pavarotti, but I still think I sound a lot like him, and perhaps that's all that matters.
I wish I could tell Robert that Bess is all right, but she has never turned up, nor have the flashlight, mirror, box of souvenirs, etc., and we have no idea as to her whereabouts. If you see a young black woman with a pretty face, perhaps sitting on a park bench hugging herself and rocking, please help her if you can and let us know where she is.
And of course I dearly wish I could tell him where his friend prot has gone. I have played for him all the tapes of our sessions together, but there is no sign of comprehension on his part. I tell him to wait a little longer, that prot has promised to return. He hears all this, curled up on his cot like some chrysalis, without batting an eye. But perhaps he understands.
Will prot ever show up again? And how did he get from his room to Bess's under our very noses? Did this involve a kind of hypnosis on his part, or a similar ability we don't comprehend? We may never know. I fervently wish I could talk with him again, just for a little while, to ask him all the questions I never got the chance to ask before. I still think we could have learned a great deal more from prot and, perhaps, from all our patients. As the cures to many of our physical ailments may be waiting for us in the rain forests, so may the remedies for our social ills lie in the deepest recesses of our minds. Who knows what any of us could do if we were able to concentrate our thoughts with prot's degree of intensity, or if we simply had sufficient willpower? Could we, like him, see ultraviolet light if we wanted to badly enough? Or fly? Or outgrow our "childhood" and create a better world for all the inhabitants of the EARTH?Perhaps he will return some day. By his own calculations he is due again soon. Giselle, who has been waiting patiently for him, has no doubts whatsoever, nor do any of the patients, nor most of the staff, who keep his dark glasses on the little dresser beside Robert's bed. And sometimes at night I go out and look up at the sky, toward the constellation Lyra, and I wonder....
Acknowledgment
I am indebted to many individuals for their generous assistance, especially John Davis, M.D., for helpful discussions, and Rea Wilmshurst, C. A. Silber, Burton H. Brody, and Robert Brewer for critical readings of the manuscript. I also thank my editors Robert Wyatt and Iris Bass for their enormous skill and excellent advice, Ida Giragossian for suggesting I give them a try, and Annette Johnson and Susan Abramowitz for their selfless efforts on my behalf. And, as always, my wife Karen for her unflagging support of everything I have ever done.
Glossary
A- angstrom (one ten-millionth of a millimeter)
ADRO-a K-PAXian grain
AFFECT-the emotional state or demeanor of a psychiatric patient
AGAPE-a star in the constellation Lyra
AIKIDO-a Japanese form of self-defense involving the throwing of one's opponent
ANAMNESIS-the recollection of past events AP-a small, elephant-like being
APHASIA -inability to speak or understand spoken or written language
BALNOK-a large-leafed K-PAXian tree
BROT-an orf (a progenitor of the dremers) c-the speed of light (186,000 miles per second)
CHOREA -a disease of the nervous system characterized by jerky, involuntary movements
CONFABULATION-the replacement of a gap in one's memory by something he or she believes to be true
COPROPHILIA-an obsession with feces
DELUSION - a false belief that is resistant to reason or confrontation with actual fact
DRAK-a red grain having a nutty flavor
DREMER-a K-PAXian of prot's species
ELECTROCONVULSIVE THERAPY (ECT)-electric shock treatment used in cases of acute depression ELECTROENCEPHALOGRAM (EEG)-a graphical representation of the electrical activity of the brain EM-a large, frog-like being who lives in trees FLED -an undescribed K-PAXian being
FLOR -an inhabited planet in the constellation Leo HOM-a K-PAXian insect
HYPNOSIS-an induced trance-like state producing vivid recollection along with an enhanced susceptibility to outside suggestion
JART-a measurement of distance (equivalent to 0.214 miles)
K-MON-one of the two suns of K-PAX (also called Agape)
KORM-a bird-like being
K-PAX -a planet in the constellation Lyra
KREE-a K-PAXian vegetable, much like a leek K-RIL-one of the suns of K-PAX (also called Satori) KROPIN-a truffle-like fungus
LIKA -a K-PAXian vegetable
MANO-a dremer
MOT-a skunk-like animal
MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER (MPD)-a psychological dysfunction characterized by the existence of two or more distinct personalities, any of which may be in command of the body at a given time
NARR-a doubter
NEUROLEPTIC DRUG-a compound having antipsychotic properties
NOLL-a planet in the constellation Leo
ORP-one of the progenitors of the dremers
PARANOIA -a mental disorder characterized by feelings of persecution
PATUSE-a K-PAXian musical instrument, similar to the bass viol
PROT - traveler
RELDO-a village on the planet K-PAX
RULI-a cow-like being
SATORI- a star in the constellation Lyra
SAVANT SYNDROME-a condition characterized by remarkable mental capabilities, usually associated with a low level of general intelligence
SwoN-an em
TERSIPION-a planet in the constellation Taurus THON-a K-PAXian grain
TOURETTE'S SYNDROME-a neurological disorder characterized by recurrent involuntary movements, and sometimes by grunts, barks, or epithets TROD -a chimpanzee-like being
YORT-a sugar plum