I had apparently not long been permitted the luxury of unconsciousness in the courtyard. I had awakened, held in a sitting position, my face, stinging, seeming to explode, being jerked, by blows, first with the flat of a hand, and then with its back, from side to side. Gorean men are not always indulgent with their female slaves. I scrambled to my knees and looked up at my master, Drusus Rencius, of Ar. "To my quarters, and swiftly, Slave," he snarled.
"Yes, Master!" I had cried, joyfully.
I had then preceded him to his quarters, moving swiftly, but scarcely swiftly enough, it seemed, from the point of view of Drusus Rencius, striding fiercely behind me, like some impatient, grumbling giant. It seemed he could not wait to get me alone. Many times was I hurried, pushed and thrust from be-hind. I was even twice kicked. It was not my fault that I was a woman, and that my legs were shorter than his! Then, at his portal, I had been ordered to my belly. I had then been bound, hand and foot. I had then been carried into the room, over his shoulder, as a slave, helpless. He had put me down on the tiles, near the foot of his couch, near the slave ring. He had locked the door. He was now standing near me, looking down at me. I pulled, futilely, at the ropes on my wrists and ankles. I was bound, perfectly. The door was locked. I was a slave girl alone with her master. I was utterly helpless.
He stepped back a bit. His face was unreadable.
"Whip me!" I begged. "I love you! Teach me that you own me!"
He took a step, further back.
"I beg the lash, Master," I said. My heart was filled with joy and love. His face was expressionless. He did not speak.
"Let me kneel before you," I said, "and beg to be beaten with a slave whip." He did not speak.
"Whip me!" I begged. "I love you! I love you!"
"Slave," he sneered.
"Yes, Master," I said.
"Natural slave," he said, angrily.
"Yes, Master," I said.
"I did not know you were a natural slave," he said.
"You knew it before you bought me," I said. "You knew it from last night." "Yes," he said.
"But still you bought me!" I said.
"Yes," he said.
"I love you!" I said.
"You are a natural slave," he said. "Your love is Worthless."
"It is, at any rate, real," I assured him.
"I wonder," he said.
"You paid for it," I said. "You must have wanted it."
"Perhaps," he said "Master?" I asked.
"Perhaps I have purchased you not for your love, but for your hate," he said. "I do not understand," I said.
"You have caused me much grief and pain," he said, "particularly when you were a free woman, in Corcyrus."
"I am sorry, Master," I said.
"And well you might be," he said, "as you are now my slave."
"I am sorry anyway," I said.
"Perhaps it is my intention to humiliate you, to debase~ and degrade you, to abuse you, to teach you, at my hands, fear, misery and pain!"
"You may do with me as you please," I smiled. "I am your slave." "I wonder how you will like it," he mused, "in your collar, hating me, but utterly helpless, knowing that you must obey me, absolutely, and serve me, in all things, with total perfection."
"I do not hate you," I laughed. "And you need not concern yourself with obedience and service. As I am a slave, you may depend upon them. Too, I shall render them to you eagerly, not only from the meaning of my collar but from the bottom of my heart."
"Perhaps I should debase and degrade you," he said.
"The more you debase and degrade me, Master," I "said, "the more I shall love you."
"How you tortured me in Corcyrus!" he said, angrily, looking down at me. "I was cruel and petty," I said.
"Much misery did you cause me," he said, angrily.
"I am sorry," I smiled. I was not completely displeased, of course, to learn of his discomfort.
"You are not truly sorry, are you?" he asked, a smile about his lips. "Not really," I admitted, shrugging in the ropes.
"Why?" he asked.
"I am a woman," I said.
"Women enjoy taunting men, and tormenting them with desire," he said. "Some women, sometimes," I said.
"You, then," he said.
"Yes," I said, angrily, rising to my elbows, "I, then!"
"I thought so," he said.
"It is a flattering tribute to a woman's power," I said, "her capacity to arouse desire!"
"Doubtless," he said, bitterly.
"I only wish I had known how important I was to you at the' time," I said. "That would have made the matter much more amusing!"
"I see," he said.
"I am glad to learn, even now,' I said, "how much I had disturbed you. Thank you for confessing it to me!"
"You're welcome," he said, quietly, perhaps too quietly. "I'm glad I made you miserable!" I said, angrily. "I'm glad I made you sweat and squirm, when you could not have me!" I was glad, too!
In Corcyrus he, though desperately attracted to me, I think, had resisted my advances. This had caused me great frustration. I had, as a consequence of this spurning of me; taken a woman's vengeance upon him. I had, in a thousand ways, in glances, in small words, in smiles, in tiny gesture's, in movements, in seemingly careless proximities, seeming inadvertences, tormented him. I had seen to it, many times, that passions would flash and flame in Drusus Rencius, which I would then, haughtily, refuse to satisfy.
"But those days are gone, aren't they?" said Drusus Renlay back on the tiles. "Yes, Master," I said. I swallowed hard. I was very conscious, then, of my nudity, and of the tight binding on my wrists and ankles, making me absolutely helpless.
"Things are different now, aren't they?" he asked. "Yes, Master,' I said. I was now a slave. The least discontentment a girl causes her master can be taken out of her hide. I was now at his disposal, completely. I must now ready myself for him, and please him fully, at as little as a glance or a snapping of fingers. "Get on your knees," he said.
"Yes, Master," I said. I struggled to my knees. It was not easy, bound as I was. He did not help me. I then knelt before him. He stood then, his arms folded, some feet from me, across the tiles.
"You look well on your knees, bound as a slave," he said. "Thank you, Master," I said. I recalled Corcyrus, where I had been to him as a Tatrix. I was now bound naked before him, as a slave.
"There are vengeances to be taken upon you," he said.
"Do with me as you will,". I said. "I am yours."
"I will," he said.
"Yes, Master," I said.
"How I despise you!" he said.
"Yes, Master," I said.
"You are utterly beautiful," he said "Thank you, Master," I said. "Are you afraid?" he asked.
"Yes," I said.
"You do not seem truly afraid," he said.
"I do not think you are the sort of man who buys woman to hurt her," I said. "You cannot know that," he said.
"I suppose not," I said. Consider the matter of marriage Most women, prior to their marriage, do not truly know the man they are marrying. They will come to know him, truly only in living with him, his. It is natural, then, that a woman should enter into such a relation with a certain amount trepidation. How much more so, then, must this be the ca with the female slave, whose new master, one who will have total power over her, is likely to be a total stranger, a fellow whom she has probably never even seen before her sale. Is I going to enfold her lovingly in his arms, and master her, and cherish her as a treasure, or is he going to feed her to sleet She does not know. You strive desperately to please him. You are his. You hope for the best.
"You do not seem convinced," he said.