Ginny chuckled and led Kara away, shaking her head. Nana was a handful!
"She’s something else," Kara said.
"Yes. And she thinks the world of you, by the way," Ginny said.
Kara raised her eyebrows and smiled. "I take it, she hasn’t actually read the article?"
"No. She knows nothing about your… personal life," Ginny said.
"Good."
"She would never understand," Ginny added.
"I know."
They walked along the booths, pausing occasionally to pick up some of the crafts that were displayed. There were a few paintings and Kara studied them while Ginny studied her. It was safer to look when Kara wasn’t aware, Ginny thought. And she did look. Try as she may, she could not stop her eyes from moving over her body, up her tan legs, past her shorts and coming to a sudden halt at the familiar tank top tucked inside. It was painfully obvious to her that Kara wore no bra and her eyes refused to move away from her breasts. Her breath caught and she swallowed with difficulty, finally raising her eyes, then blushing crimson when Kara caught her staring.
Kara held Ginny’s eyes captive for several embarrassing seconds, then, with an arch of one eyebrow, she released her.
Ginny breathed again and she dared not look at Kara. What is wrong with you?
She felt totally out of control and her hands were trembling as she brought her beer cup to her lips. God, she was looking at a woman’s breast! Had she lost her mind?
"I think I need another beer," Kara said.
"Me, too," Ginny murmured. She was hot and she knew it had nothing to do with the summer day!
They found Nana sitting at a table, two seats saved for them and Kara waited politely for Ginny to slide along the bench seat first.
"What do you think?" Nana asked Kara.
"I like it. It’s fun," she said.
Ginny was all too aware of the woman sitting next to her to participate in the conversation. Her skin burned where Kara’s leg brushed her thigh and she couldn’t stop her pulse from racing through her veins. She tried to think of Phil, she tried to recall how it was to kiss him, to make love with him, but nothing would come to her. The memory of Kara’s kiss pushed Phil from her mind and Ginny felt herself grow warm as she recalled standing by the lake, moving into Kara’s arms, her mouth opening to Kara, her own tongue pushing wildly into Kara’s mouth.
"Oh," she groaned softly and she closed her eyes tight.
"Ginny?"
"Hmmm?"
"Are you okay?" Nana asked.
Ginny looked across the table at Nana and felt herself blush hotly. "I’m fine," she said. "Just a little hot," she murmured.
"It is quite warm today. I’m so glad I wore shorts," Nana said.
Ginny tried to listen as Nana told Kara about their morning but her mind was on the leg that pressed gently against her own. Good Lord, I can’t stand it! What was Kara doing to her? Did she not have any idea of the effect she was having on Ginny? Ginny sighed, savoring the feeling of Kara’s bare leg pressed against her own. She refused to wonder why she didn’t move away from that warm touch.
Ginny was so thankful when the food was ready, she stood behind Kara and Nana in line, listening to Nana ramble on, meeting Kara’s amused eyes occasionally. How could Kara act like nothing had happened between them? How could she be so unaffected by it all?
Because she’s a lesbian. She’s used to kissing other women! Ginny slammed her eyes shut. Well, she was not a lesbian and she was not used to kissing other women and it was driving her absolutely crazy! God, her skin crawled just being near Kara and she just wanted the day to be over and for Kara to go away again and leave her in peace.
"Ginny?"
"What?"
"Are you okay?" Kara whispered.
"No, I’m not," she admitted. Her eyes flew to Kara’s and she wished she had not looked. She couldn’t pull away and she felt her chest heave as she tried to catch her breath. "I can’t be around you like this," she whispered.
She saw a brief flash of understanding cross Kara’s eyes before she nodded. "I know. I’m sorry," Kara said softly. "It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have come."
"No. It’s…"
"Ginny, look, there’s Mr. and Mrs. Dower. You remember them?" Nana called to the Dower’s but they didn’t hear her. "Oh, I’ll have to look them up later. You were just a teenager the last time they saw you," Nana said.
"I remember them," Ginny said absently, her eyes still locked with Kara’s.
They took their plates back to the table, Kara’s loaded high with nothing but fries and two pieces of cake, and Ginny was again forced to endure sitting close to Kara.
"Oh, the band’s good this year, Ginny," Nana said.
"Yes." Although she had hardly been listening. She ate in silence, her mind far away from the conversation between Kara and Nana.
Kara gathered up their plates when they had all finished eating and went for more beer and Ginny looked up and smiled at Nana.
"Having a good time?" she asked.
"Wonderful," Nana said. "But are you?"
"Of course."
"You’ve been awfully quiet," Nana said. "Are you not feeling well?"
"I feel fine," Ginny said. Why, oh why must Nana always notice?
"Do you think Kara’s having a good time?"
Ginny nodded. "I think so." Was she? It was hard to tell. Kara, too, had been quiet.
"Here you go," Kara said, balancing two cups of beer and an iced tea in her hands. Ginny reached out to help her and when their hands touched, she trembled from the electricity between them, spilling beer on the table.
"God, I’m sorry," she murmured, mopping up the spill with her napkin.
"It’s okay."
She couldn’t stand it. Not another minute. They had to talk. This was slowly driving her insane, this… attraction, yes, okay, attraction, that she had for Kara. And she could not stand it a second longer. She needed to… what? Talk? Yes, she needed to talk to her about it. She was so confused inside. Her traitorous body screamed for release but her mind refused to listen to it. This couldn’t be happening to her. She was not a lesbian!
Ginny leaned toward Kara, speaking softly so that Nana would not hear. "We need to talk." When Kara looked at her, she added, "I need to talk."
"Okay," Kara agreed. "Why don’t we take a drive?"
Ginny nodded and turned to Nana. "We’re going to walk around a bit, Nana. You’ll be okay here?"
"Of course. You run along."
They walked towards Kara’s Land Cruiser without speaking and Ginny wondered what in the world she would say to Kara. She only wished for one thing; that her heart wouldn’t pound so whenever Kara was near.
Kara opened the door for Ginny and she crawled inside, remembering the last time she had been in Kara’s truck. They had been driving back, after The Kiss. They had not spoken. Not one word. Kara had stopped in front of the house and Ginny had nearly run from the truck then.
"Where to?" Kara asked.
"It doesn’t matter," Ginny said.
Kara drove slowly down the deserted streets and she reached into the console, fishing out her crumpled pack of cigarettes. She shoved one into her mouth, then glanced at Ginny.
"You don’t mind, do you?"
"Of course not," she said.
Kara inhaled deeply, letting the smoke settle in her lungs, calming her. So, Ginny wanted to talk. Great. Just what she wanted to do. Talk about how she had kissed her and screwed up her life.
"Why don’t we go to my house?" Ginny said. "We can sit and talk, then."
Kara hesitated. The last thing they needed was to be alone in Ginny’s house. But she nodded anyway.
Ginny walked quickly ahead of Kara, suddenly nervous at being alone with her. Maybe they should have kept driving and talked in the truck. She wrapped her arms around herself and turned to Kara as soon as the door was closed.