She heard Kara’s low chuckle.
"Sweetheart, I’m the one who’s miserable."
She hung up, staring at the phone, wondering what she was going to do. Kara was right. It would be uncomfortable for them, both of them, but she had to see her. She needed to look into her eyes. She closed her own, remembering Kara’s soft touch upon her body, the soft lips that had brought her such pleasure. It wasn’t Phil. It never had been. She had been a fool to allow him to come here and a bigger fool yet to allow him into her bed. It was Kara she wanted. In her life and in her bed. Not Phil. Not any man.
They hiked up to the falls and sat on the rock, just out of the reach of the cool spray. Ginny had hoped that Kara would come early, but by the time that Nana was ready to hike, there had been no sign of her. Ginny was afraid that she had changed her mind and that she wouldn’t come, after all. And she needed her to come. She needed to see her. She needed to talk to her, to tell her how she felt and she couldn’t wait another day. As she sat there, she had already decided that if Kara didn’t show, she would drive to the cabin herself. She didn’t give a damn what Phil or Nana thought.
"This is beautiful," Phil said. "Good idea, Nana."
She beamed at him and Ginny had a crazy notion that Nana loved him much more than Ginny ever had. She watched him. He was a handsome man. She had always thought so, anyway. But she knew now that he wasn’t what she wanted and he never could be. She knew without a doubt that she would never be with a man again. She knew that with certainty after last night.
She had cried and Phil hadn’t understood. He had held her and tried to soothe her but she had pulled out of his arms. She didn’t want his touch. She didn’t ever want his touch again. She had taken her pillow and slept on the couch, only going back to her room when she heard Nana stirring.
Phil hadn’t commented on it today, but he had watched her, she knew. And tonight, she would tell him. She would tell him that she didn’t love him and that she was not going to marry him and she would send him away. It would break Nana’s heart, of course, but Ginny couldn’t worry about that now. She could not survive the week if things remained as they were.
It was nearly six when they got back to their picnic table, but still no sign of Kara. Ginny tried not to let her disappointment show, helping to unload their firewood for their later fire and showing the proper amount of enthusiasm for the hotdog dinner that Nana had planned.
"I wonder where Kara is?" Nana asked for the third time and she stared off down the dirt road, looking for her truck.
"Probably working and lost track of time," Ginny offered. And perhaps it was true.
Kara turned the Land Cruiser onto the bumpy road, cigarette clamped between her teeth, her eighth of the day. She would rather being going anywhere at this moment other than to meet Phil. Even the damn dentist, she thought But Ginny had pleaded and Kara admitted that she couldn’t stay away from her another day, even if she had to share her with a man. A man who hoped to marry her.
Had they slept together? Of course. He had come up here for that very reason, after all, she thought bitterly. Jealousy consumed her and ate at her stomach and she hated herself for what she was feeling. See what happens when you fall for a straight woman, she thought. Straight? Ginny was many things, but straight was not one of them. Not after the way she made love to Kara. She couldn’t be. The way she touched her with such intensity, such passion. No. No one could make love to another woman like that and be straight.
Nana saw her and waved and Kara forced a smiled and waved back. She had never been one for praying, but she sent a silent plea to anyone who might be listening. Please, just get me thought this evening.
"We were wondering if you’d forgotten," Nana said.
"Working," she lied. She hadn’t picked up a brush in two days.
Ginny walked up to her and met her eyes, uncaring that Nana was watching them. All she wanted to do was to wrap her arms around her and hold her. "Kara," she said softly. "I’m so glad you’re here," she whispered, hoping Nana couldn’t hear.
"Hi." Kara’s eyes greedily traveled over Ginny, remembering how responsive she had been in her arms and she felt her pulse quicken. She shouldn’t have come, she thought.
"Come meet Phil," Nana said and pulled Kara after her. Ginny saw the anguish in Kara’s eyes as they left her and she followed close behind.
"Phil, this is Kara Morgan, the artist," Nana presented importantly.
"Hello," he said and took Kara’s outstretched hand. "I’ve seen your work. Very nice."
Kara smiled and released his hand quickly. He was attractive, she thought with dismay. If you liked that sort of thing, anyway.
"Which is more than we have," Nana added.
"I don’t really have anything finished, Louise."
"My boss bought Tomorrow and Today," Phil said.
"Oh." Kara smiled, hating the fact that this man had access to her painting. "That’s one of my favorites. Top ten."
"You mean, you rank your paintings?" Phil asked. "What? One to ten?"
Kara laughed. "Some I just like more than others," she said. "But everyone has different tastes. Some I like so much, they become too personal to part with," she said.
"Oh, so you don’t sell everything?"
She smiled briefly and Ginny saw that it didn’t reach her eyes. "Sometimes I paint just for me," she said. "Others, I give as gifts." She shrugged, not wanting to have this conversation with him.
"Wow. Some gift. Well, it’s very nice to meet you. Nana’s told me quite a bit about you," he said.
Kara glanced at Louise who smiled sheepishly. "A beer?" Louise asked.
"Yeah, please."
"I’ll get it," Phil offered.
Kara turned and found Ginny watching her and her eyes moved over her quickly. Ginny brought her hands out, as if to touch her, then dropped them to her sides.
"Kara," she whispered softly, her eyes searching. She didn’t care that Nana was watching.
"Here you go," Phil said and Kara turned to him, muttering a thank you and took the offered beer.
They sat in lawn chairs and Kara observed this man that had shared Ginny’s life. And still did. An attractive man, but still a man, she noted. And possessive. He sat close to Ginny, touching her knee with his hand as he spoke and Kara couldn’t take her eyes off of them. She felt jealously smoldering inside of her and hated it. What she and Ginny had shared was most likely temporary. And most likely over. Phil had come here to stake his claim.
"Are you from Seattle?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Well, once Ginny moves back, we’ll have to get together," he said easily.
She met his eyes for a moment. "Sure," she said lightly. She ventured a glance at Ginny who met her eyes and Kara did not miss the quick apology that flashed her way.
"Did you bring your sketch pad, Kara?" Nana asked. "It’s almost sunset."
"No, Louise. I’ve sketched the falls before. They’re much better at sunrise," she said.
"They’re beautiful at any time," Phil stated.
Kara smiled, hating this man. "Yes, they are. I was speaking of sketching, though."
Ginny rubbed her temples, feeling a headache approaching. This had been a mistake, she thought wearily. Phil was actually competing with Kara, as if he knew she was a threat.
"Ginny?"
"Hmmm?" She looked up at Nana.
"Why don’t you take Kara to the Big Tree?"
Ginny glanced at Kara. "Have you seen it?" she asked. It would give them a chance to talk. She hoped Kara had not been there before.
"No. What big tree?"
Ginny laughed. "Big Tree. It’s a cedar. Three hundred feet tall and as wide as a house," she said.
"You go ahead. Phil and I will start the fire," Nana said.