‘There are however various ceremonies at which Princes of the first rank must be present such as a memorial service for members of the Royal Family, a Day of Prayer, or a National Holiday. On such occasions, the King is always angered by a Prince’s absence, which he unfailingly notices.’
Considering Katya’s unfaltering devotion to her own faith, her attitude to Buddhism is surprisingly receptive for she writes:
‘The more I get to know Buddhist customs the more I like this religion. There are a remarkably large number of monasteries here. Monks wear yellow robes, their heads are shaved and they go barefoot. Every Siamese on reaching the age of 20 becomes a monk for a while and enters a monastery, usually for three or four months, but not less than three days. When Lek returned to Bangkok, one of his uncles – who is the Patriarch – asked him repeatedly when he intended to enter a monastery and was very puzzled when he received no reply – the real reason, of course is that Lek could not become a monk as he is already a married man!’
On the other hand, in common with the imaginative Mrs Leonowens before her, Katya expressed wholehearted disapproval of ‘the position of women’.
‘They are not educated at all and from early childhood taught to regard a man as a superior being. Polygamy, which I find disgusting, is widespread. Sometimes one man will have ten wives or even more. There is a favourite wife and all the others are practically servants, who have to crawl before their master and are afraid to utter a word. This arouses my indignation.
‘I am sure you know that the King has many wives but the numerous Princes – sons of the King but not the Queen – rarely have more than one. While the Crown Prince is unmarried, Lek has me, and eight other children are not yet grown-up. I hope when the Crown Prince comes to the throne this custom will die out, as people always follow an example set by their King or Queen. It is known that the Crown Prince will only have the one wife because of his convictions and I like this very much in him. And the Minister of Justice also only has one wife!
‘If rumours are to be believed, the Queen is less angry than she was. I am longing to have children, particularly as they will be the Queen’s first grandchildren, and I hope will make up for Lek’s marriage to a European woman.
‘Anyway all has turned out better than I expected. Of course our marriage could not have passed off without scandal and, to tell the truth, it was an outrageous step on the part of Lek, when you consider that he is a Siamese, a Buddhist and a son of the King and was well aware of the ideas and prejudices of his native land.
‘The Siamese also have a way of dressing that seems strange to us for, although they find a European décolleté indecent, when at home they are naked except for a scarf and odd-looking trousers like pantaloons, which are the national dress.
‘Servants here come to a prince’s house and ask to serve him without payment: this is most extraordinary, but when you realise that all our servants in this house are nobles, it seems more unusual still. However in the end, Lek decides how much he gives them. He is very generous and is much loved.
‘I must admit it took me some time to become accustomed to the etiquette here, particularly as I have said, our servants are nobles. Even so, they never stand upright before a prince, but show respect by crawling with bent head. If I am sitting, they hand me my letters or a glass of water kneeling on one knee and move backwards when I stand. And even though I am European, as the wife of a Prince, I must be paid these respects. I confess that earlier I did not like it at all but, as protest is useless, I am now getting used to it …
‘As for the language, there is nothing to worry about as I can clearly understand what is said and can speak on any subject I wish – my maid and I comprehend each other perfectly.
‘I shall learn English next as it is most important to be able to speak it in the East.’
A page from the Russian-English dictionary that Katya wrote herself.
However despite her wish to acquire another European language, Katya was unequivocal about European behaviour in Siam, which she described forthrightly as:
‘Disgusting, for though they are at service in Siam and receive enormous salaries from the Siamese, they consider them inferior and mock them. In other words they behave disgracefully, and as the wife of a Siamese and a Prince, I feel disgusted by them!
‘The rainy season was over a week ago and we go for a drive every evening after dinner. Tiny phosphorescent insects dot the trees like stars and fly around our car. Old shady alleys look somehow magical where huge trees line the canals covered with lotus flowers. We whirl along as if in a fairy tale and I can quite understand now why Siam is called a fairy land. Elephants walk along the streets, there is plenty of delicious fruit and beautiful exotic flowers – it is really like being in paradise …
‘As the car is open, the many gossips, anxious to see what I look like, can satisfy their curiosity.’
But evidently a car-drive in the cool of the evening was not sensational enough and, by the time an account of their outings came back to Katya, the story had lost nothing in the telling:
‘They say I drive out alone in a two-wheeled equipage drawn by a white draught-horse with two footmen behind. Needless to say we have neither such an equipage nor such a horse!’
Whereas this absurd fabrication had at least a bizarre charm, another piece of gossip to which Katya devoted two pages in a letter to her brother, was typical of the small-mindedness often generated in court or near-court circles.
This incident was due to the Adjutant’s Russian wife Elena Nicholaievna, who might by now have become friendly with her compatriot Katya, had she not become envious and therefore spiteful. For whereas, according to Katya, she had in Singapore ‘played a lady of great importance’, once arrived in Bangkok, their different status became a problem:
‘And though she is a nice woman, she is terribly fond of boasting about her home, her relatives, her carriages, her life before she got married, while here she must lead a modest life. I on the other hand, being married to a Prince, live in a luxurious palace, I am a customer of all the best European shops. I have horses and a car while she has nothing of the kind.’
While it is true that this patronising attitude on the part of the eighteen year old bride must have been extremely galling, Elena Nicholaievna made further mischief by insinuating to Domol, Chakrabongse and Katya’s adopted son, that ‘Katya was not a hostess in her own house and could not even go for a drive when she wished.’ Domol reported back to Katya. Katya was hurt and told her husband. Chakrabongse told his Adjutant. The Adjutant told his wife, who the next time she came to dine, kissed and embraced Katya and told her that ‘she had been waiting for Katya as for golden rain from heaven!’ She accused Domol of lying. And Katya commented that ‘I am sorry not to be close friends with the only other Russian woman here.’