His face was suddenly split in that infernal boyish grin of his.
“Well — I’m intrigued. It was what you wanted, what you were aiming for. So please, let us waste no more time with these pointless dramatics.”
If I looked startled, believe me, it was not all acting. Still, I could not help but point out that had I approached him — at his home, say — I would have been thrown out by the butler.
His big hand waved this aside.
I became all business. “How much do you want to transfer?”
He didn’t hesitate. “Five million dollars’ worth of francs.”
I nodded. “It will take some time. Six or seven months, at least.”
He frowned. “You bring it out in dribs and drabs?”
“Oh, no,” I assured him. “When it comes, it comes at once, issued by the Belgian Government through one or more of its banks.” He stared at me. “But it will be expensive,” I added.
“Just how expensive?”
I matched his forthrightness. “It will cost you one million of those five million dollars,” I said evenly. “That will be my fee. Also...”
“One million dollars?”
“Much cheaper than the black market,” I pointed out. “And safe.” He merely stared at me, so I continued. “There will be certain expenses involved, as well. These would also fall to your account.”
“Naturally,” he said drily. He leaned against the cushion of his chair in deep thought. I passed the time in slowly sipping my martini. At last he nodded.
“Very well,” he said. “If you can demonstrate to me how this money can be legally transferred from Belgian francs to dollars within a reasonable period of time, you can consider me interested.”
I studied the face before me. This, of course, was the only flaw in the scheme — if you can call it a flaw: the fact that I would have to disclose the scheme without any guarantees. Still, it was obvious that the details would have to be divulged; and also, I thought I could trust the man.
I pushed my glass aside and leaned forward, speaking slowly. He nodded from time to time as if in appreciation of the brilliance of the idea. When at last I finished, he leaned back, pursing his lips as he considered every phase of my plan.
“Yes,” he said at last. “Yes. It is certainly possible. Very clever. Of course it places me a bit more in your hands than I like to be...”
“True,” I admitted, since, of course, it was perfectly true and we both knew it. “Still, there is no other way to do it. You can’t be in two places at the same time. And if I were to cheat you, I could end up in prison for stealing; whereas, if I don’t cheat you, I end up with a million dollars and no trouble.”
He nodded and pushed himself to his feet. “Well, we shall have to think about it,” he said, and turned in the direction of the dining room. “Shall we eat?”
I frankly admit that the next two days were nervous ones for me. By the evening of the second day, I had just about come to the conclusion that either Klees had decided not to go along with the idea, or was going to make the move with somone else. For the tenth time, I was on the verge of calling him, when he finally rang through on the telephone and asked me to meet him for lunch.
To make a long story short, Klees agreed with the scheme — although he still wasn’t happy about my cut — and three days later Elsa and I were on the Ile de France on our way to the States. Not first-class, but still...
(Huuygens paused and then quite blatantly waved an arm for the waiter. I waited while his drink was poured; he raised his glass in a mock salute and drank deeply. When he resumed speaking, I thought he was changing the subject, but as he continued, I soon saw the connection.)
You know (Huuygens continued), this America is the most amazing country! If one is too old for the draft, or has the type of job that does not require social security, he can easily pass his entire life without any official identification whatsoever. And if this lack disturbs one, it is the easiest thing in the world to arrange whatever documentation one’s ego prefers. There are Diner’s Club Cards, Hotel Credit Cards, Gasoline Credit Cards — well, I could go on half the night.
It is really too simple for words. The only thing you require to start is an address, and this is easily arranged by renting a postal box using any address you invent. The post office never checks; if you pay your rental on time and do not allow mail to accumulate, you are completely safe. And once you have established post-box addresses, you are free to open bank accounts. And with bank accounts, of course, all doors open. The thing works like a merry-go-round, beautifully endless and completely mad...
Within two weeks of my return, I had established respectable cash balances in six different New York banks in the names of six different companies. I represented myself as the treasurer of each of these companies, with the only authorized signature for deposits and withdrawals. I did not rent safe-deposit boxes; instead, I purchased the largest home safe that would go through the door of our apartment, and had it installed. I had a momentary fear that the workmen might think it odd, but New Yorkers are the most blasé people in the world.
The money for the bank deposits, of course, I had to borrow from certain old — and I admit, disreputable — acquaintances, but Klees had expressed himself as preferring the payment of high interest to allowing me to get my hands on the few dollars he did have. It was all the same to me, since the interest fell to the expense of the operation. And we were ready to go.
I’m rather proud of the names of the companies I selected. I won’t bore you with a complete list, but they included names like The International Farm Equipment Company and the United States Agricultural Equipment Company — names designed to sound substantial. And heavy, if you know what I mean. Our stationery reflected our respectability. And the catalogues! Each company had its own masterpiece — four-color offset work with authentic pictures cut from actual catalogues, and descriptions printed in four languages. They were works of art, those catalogues, and to study the six of them was to find the answer to any agricultural problem in the world.
Those were busy days, for in addition to arranging the printing of the stationery and the catalogues, I maintained a constant flow of money between the accounts, from one company to another, from one bank to another, so that at least once a week each account demonstrated an extremely large cash balance. It took time and it was wearing, but I must admit it was fun. I came to be greeted quite politely by bank officials, and besides, I love to handle money. I should have been a banker. Or possibly not.
Once the stationery was in our hands, we began the necéssary correspondence with Klees Imports. Air-mail letters flowed from our apartment with a regularity that must have pleased the Post Office Department. Elsa complained of the work involved, but I was in no mood for mutiny in the ranks, and let her know it in no uncertain terms. I was too busy with the banks and the catalogue printers to sit home typing, and I certainly didn’t want an outside secretary involved! And as the correspondence grew, I also found it necessary to spend time at the Public Library reading up on the technical aspects of agricultural equipment, since Klees was now asking for details, and of course, they had to sound authentic.
Klees, of course, was also getting quotations from competitors in all parts of the world, but since most of the factories manufacturing equipment of this nature were already swamped with orders, none of them could meet our truly miraculous delivery dates. And our prices were good, being ten per cent lower than the lowest I could find. And so our correspondence continued, growing in volume, moving from the vague to the specific, until at last we got down to the hard facts of price for quantity, delivery, contract terms, export boxing, and all those thousands of niggling details so beloved of business people.