Of course, I was wrong, as so often; it was not a transit of Mercury I had witnessed, as you know, but a sunspot. Have you, I wonder, a theory as to the origin of this phenomenon? I have witnessed it often since that day, yet I have not decided to my own satisfaction what is the explanation. Perhaps they are a form of cloud, as in our own skies, but wonderfully black and heavy, and therefore easily to be seen. Or maybe they are emanations of burning gas rising from the fiery surface? For my own part, they are of the utmost interest not in their cause, but in that, by their form amp; evident motion, they prove satisfactorily the rotation of the sun, which I had postulated without proof in my Astronomia nova. I wonder that I could do so much in that book, without the aid of the telescope, which in your work you have put to such good use.
What should we do without our science? It is, even in these dread times, a great consolation. My master Rudolph grows stranger day by day: I think he will not live. Sometimes he seems not to understand that he is no longer emperor. I do not disabuse him of this dream. How sad a place the world is. Who would not rather ascend into the clear amp; silent heights of celestial speculation?
Please do not take my bad example to heart, but write to me soon again. I am, Sir,
yours, Johannes Kepler
Gasthof zum Goldenen Greif
Prague
September 1611
Frau Regina Ehern: at Pfaffenhofen
Life, so it used to seem to me, my dear Regina, is a formless amp; forever shifting stuff, a globe of molten glass, say, which we have been flung, and which, without even the crudest of instruments, with only our bare hands, we must shape into a perfect sphere, in order to be able to contain it within ourselves. That, so I thought, is our task here, I mean the transformation of the chaos without, into a perfect harmony amp; balance within us. Wrong, wrong: for our lives contain us, we are the flaw in the crystal, the speck of grit which must be ejected from the spinning sphere. It is said, that a drowning man sees all his life flash before him in the instant before he succumbs: but why should it be only so for death by water? I suspect it is true whatever the manner of dying. At the final moment, we shall at last perceive the secret amp; essential form of all we have been, of all our actions amp; thoughts. Death is the perfecting medium. This truth-for I believe it to be a truth-has manifested itself to me with force in these past months. It is the only answer that makes sense of these disasters amp; pains, these betrayals.
I will not hold you responsible, dear child, for our present differences. There are those about you, and one in particular, I know, who will not leave in peace even a bereaved amp; ailing man in his hour of agony. Your mother was hardly cold in her grave when that first imperious missive from your husband arrived, like a blow to the stomach, and now you write to me in this extraordinary fashion. This is not your tone of voice, which I remember with tenderness amp; love, this is not how you would speak to me, if the choice were yours. I can only believe that these words were dictated to you. Therefore, I am not now addressing you, but, through you, another, to whom I cannot bring myself to write directly. Let him prick up his ears. This squalid matter shall be cleared up to the satisfaction of all.
How can you insinuate that I am delaying in the payment of these monies? What do I care for mere cash, I, who have lost that which was more precious to me than an emperor's treasury of gold, I mean my wife amp; my beloved son? That my lady Barbara chose not to mention me in her will is a profound hurt, but yet I intend to carry out her wishes. Although I have not the heart at the moment to investigate thoroughly how matters stand, I know in general the state of Frau Kepler's fortune, or what remains of it. When her father died, and the Mühleck estates were divided, she possessed some 3,000 florins in properties amp; goods. She was therefore not so rich as we had been led to believe-but that is another matter. I went with Frau Kepler to Graz at that time, when Jobst Müller had died, and spent no little time amp; pains in converting her inheritance into cash. Styrian taxes then were nothing less than punitive measures against Lutherans, and we suffered heavy losses in transferring her monies out of Austria. That is why there is not now those thousands which some people think I am trying to appropriate. Our life in Bohemia had been difficult, the Emperor was not the most prompt of paymasters, and inevitably, despite Frau Kepler's extreme parsimony, calls were made from time to time upon her capital. There were her many illnesses, the fine clothes which she insisted upon, and then, she was not one to be satisfied with beans amp; sausages. Do you imagine that we lived on air?
Also, after my marriage, I succeeded, against great opposition, in being appointed guardian of my wife's little daughter, our dear Regina, because I loved the child, as she was then, and because I feared that among her mother's people she would be exposed to the danger of Catholicism. I had been promised by Jobst Müller, 70 florins per annum for the child's maintenance: I was never paid a penny of that allowance, nor, of course, was I permitted to touch Regina 's own considerable fortune. Therefore, I am fully justified in deducting from the inheritance a just amp; suitable recompense. I have two children of my own to care for. My friends amp; patrons, the House of Fugger, will oversee the transfer to you of the remaining sum. I trust you will not accuse them of suspect dealing?
Johannes Kepler
Prague December 1610
Dr Johannes Brengger: at Kaufieuren
I have received today, from Markus Welser in Cologne, the first pages in proof of my Dioptrice. The printing has been delayed, and even now, when it has finally started, there is a problem with the financing of the project, and I fear it will be some long time before the work is completed. I finished it in August, and presented it at once to my patron, the Elector Ernst of Cologne, who unfortunately has proved less enthusiastic amp; less prompt than the author, and seems not to be in any hurry to give to the world this important work which is dedicated to him. However, I am glad to see even these few pages in print, since in my present troubled state I am grateful for the small diversion which they provide. How far away already seem those summer months, when my health looked to be improving, and I worked with such vigour. Now I am subject once more to bouts of fever, and consequently I have no energy, and am sore in spirit. Worries abound, and there are rumours of war. Yet, looking now afresh at the form of this little book, I am struck by the thought that perhaps, without realising it, I had some intimation of the troubles to come, for certainly it is a strange work, uncommonly severe amp; muted, wintry in tone, precise in execution. It is not like me at all.