I put my gun to the soldier’s head.
“Guess it’s just you and me, sweetheart. That okay with you?”
“Yes, sir.”
“I’m not an officer, so don’t sir me. But you are going to obey that other officer’s order, aren’t you?”
His eyes scan the room, lingering on his dead and dying pals.
“Sure. Whatever you want. The new arrivals are easy to find.”
He takes a set of keys from the wall and picks up a heavy coat. He points to the soldier I got in the eye.
“It’s cold outside. You might want a coat.”
“Don’t worry about me. Just go.”
Twenty yards down a road rutted with snowcat tread marks there are heavy iron double gates. Like something you might see outside of an asylum in an old B movie. Icicles hang from the fence, as thick as a man’s leg and twice as long. The old lock on the gate is as big as a pumpkin. The guard has to bang it against the metal a few times to break the ice off before he can insert the key.
“The new ones always stay by the gate. High up here on the hill. The wind isn’t as bad in the valley, but they always stay up here at first. Some ice over and never make it down.”
I see what he means. Down in the valley, millions of dots mill around. Damned souls. Some huddle together in the waste like penguins in a snowstorm, guarding their brood. Down the nearby hillside are the frozen souls of the ones who never made it as far as the valley floor. Among those pathetic forms are men and women, some in suits, some in jeans and T-shirts, others in rags or stark naked, standing or sitting on the hill. The wind picks up. The temperature drops and it’s hard to see anything. I’m sorry now that I didn’t take the dead soldier’s coat.
“Traven. Father Traven,” I shout. But the wind is loud enough that I’m not sure how far my voice carries.
I grab the guard.
“You shout too. Go that way and shout. The soul’s name is ‘Traven.’ ”
The soldier wanders off looking as lost as the damned and yelling, “Raven. Raven.”
I get out the SIG and fire a couple of shots.
“Traven. Father Traven. Up here.”
The wind keeps blowing. Visibility is shit. If Traven was standing right in front of me in a prom dress, I don’t know if I’d notice him.
A figure comes trudging up the hill. It’s tall and haggard, with its coat wrapped tight around it. I start down toward it. His face is still pale and blotched with the same broken blood vessels from when he died.
“Who are you? What do you want?” he yells.
I push down the hoodie and kill the glamour. His eyes narrow.
“Stark? Is that you?”
He touches my shoulders, my face, still trying to figure out if I’m real.
“Ready to get out of here, Father?”
“To where?”
Oh. Right.
“I hadn’t really thought that part through. Why don’t we get out of the wind and we’ll figure it out.”
“I’d like that.”
We start up the hill. Stupid me. I’m so happy to see Traven that I forgot about the guard. He comes charging out of the blizzard with a knife in his hand. Slashes my left arm, my Kissi arm, which means he only manages to ruin yet another one of my coats. I take out the SIG and shoot him in the legs. That gets the attention of all the mobile souls on the hillside. They look around at us. Some start up the hill. When I take Traven out the gates, I leave them open. The guard crawls after us. He’s yelling something but I can’t hear him over the sound of the wind. Besides, he’s surrounded by freezing, damned souls. I don’t think he’ll be shouting much longer. I throw the keys into a snowdrift.
I take Traven into the Quonset hut. He stops for a minute by the door when he sees the dead guards.
“All this death just to save me? Why?”
“Because I’m Sandman Slim. A monster and damned and those are the kind of choices I make.”
Traven goes to the oven and warms himself.
“I pulled you out of that hole because I like you, but I don’t want your gratitude. I did it because sending you here was as much a sin as anything you ever swallowed on earth. And saving you is a message to the people who make the rules.”
“And what is that message?”
“Don’t be such assholes.”
That makes him laugh a little. It’s good to see his face in anything but a frown or lined in deep thought. This isn’t a guy who’s had a lot of fun in his life. I think this last month with Brigitte might have been his best days. I suppose there are worse times to die. But it was still too soon for him.
I take a coat from the soldier I stabbed and wrap it around Traven.
“There’s only one place I can take you right now. The Room of Thirteen Doors. No one can touch you there. That includes Lucifer and God. I’ll figure out what to do after you’re safe.”
“Can I see Brigitte?”
“No.” It’s a hard thing to say. “You’re dead and you’re not coming back. Let her grieve and deal with it.”
“You’re right. I wasn’t thinking.”
“Don’t sweat it, Father. It takes a while to figure out the rules of being dead.”
“You died and came back to life.”
“I’m not human.”
“You could have fooled me.”
“Thanks.”
I look out the window. The wind has died down.
“Listen. When I get you in the Room, I’ll bring you some of your books. Maybe pens and paper, if you want. Not regular stuff. Like necromantic school supplies. Stuff to occupy yourself until I figure out the next move. I already put the 8 Ball there. Think of it this way. You’re not some poor schmuck stuck in a room. You’re what’s-his-name. The knight who guarded the Holy Grail.”
“Arthur was supposed to have guarded it in some legends. The descendants of Joseph of Arimathea in others. There’s the story of Parsifal. Also stories about the Templars.”
“Damn. You do know some trivia. No. I mean the three knights who guarded it.”
Traven looks at me.
“I think you might be thinking of a movie.”
“Probably.”
Warmer now, he puts the guard’s coat on over his jacket.
“Thank you. I don’t know what else to say.”
“I’m sorry I dragged you into Kill City.”
“I’m not. I’ve looked into God’s face and I’ve tasted the worst of his wrath. After that, I suppose I’m prepared for a room, a grail, or whatever else might come.”
“Stay here and keep warm. I’m going to check on that hellhound outside. And maybe something else.”
I take a gun from one of the dead soldiers and give it to Traven.
“If anyone but me comes through the door, don’t ask questions. Shoot. You’re in Hell, Father. Don’t worry that you might shoot any schoolmarms.”
“I’ll think about it,” he says, and puts the gun in his pocket.
Silly me. He’ll never use it. He’s still a priest. Sentimental.
I go out and worry about him for the hour I’m gone.
WHEN I GET back, Traven, the crazy bastard, has practically opened a soup kitchen in the Quonset hut. A hundred damned souls who’ve wandered up from the valley huddle inside trying to work the feeling back into their dead limbs.
“Can’t leave you alone for a minute, can I?”
“Old habits die hard,” says Traven. “Wait. I think I just made a joke. My first joke as a dead man.”
“Congratulations. I’ll send you roses and a rubber chicken. It’s time to go.”
I pull him outside. As we go, he gives his heavy coat to a woman in rags afraid to go into the warm building. She stares at him and kisses his hand.
“Move it, Gandhi.”
He gives her a smile and comes over to me.
“Can’t we take some of them back with us? How big is the Room?”
“Sure, Father. Which of them gets rescued and who has to stay in Hell forever? You choose.”
“I see the dilemma.”
“Lucifer, the first Lucifer, always told me my problem was that I didn’t think big. Well, I’m trying to now. And stashing a few souls in the pantry isn’t the way to do it.”