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“No, but we do have a new addition to the family.”

I laugh. “You got the dog?”

“Yeah, we did.”

“And its name is Kiki?”

“No. We settled on Aurora Jasmine Tinkerbell Michelle.”

“Michelle?”

“Yes. That was Gracie’s choice.”

“So is that what they’re calling it? All those names?”

“No. They’re still calling it Kiki. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Mom. I don’t want them to forget me. At least they will be saying my name sometimes.”

“I love you and I miss you terribly. Are you sure you’re doing okay? I worry about you every single day.”

“I’m safe, Mom, that’s the main thing. And I love you too.”

Dawson takes me into town for a late lunch. We stop at this dive that he says has the best hamburgers ever and sit at a little picnic table out front, eating what actually is the best hamburger of my life. And I’m pretty sure it’s because of the company, not the actual meal. He feeds me French fries and buys me a chocolate cone with sprinkles for dessert.

Oh, and I started on the pill as soon as I unpacked them. I tried to figure out where I was in my cycle and started the pills at that point. From what I read online, I should be protected after being on it for seven days, but it also suggested to wait until after your first period to consider yourself fully protected. When I use the bathroom at the dive, I’m surprised to discover that my period has started. I was expecting it based on the pills, but I didn’t even have cramps! And I always know when it starts because I usually get horrible cramps. I need to call my mother back and seriously thank her.

Riley and Ace both text us to let us know that a bunch of people are meeting up to watch college football games at a big sports bar and then to have dinner there. It’s gorgeous out, so we all sit around big tables on the sports bar’s patio and watch the game on the rows of flat screens. Then Dawson and I go see a movie.

After that, he walks me to my dorm, kisses me over and over until I’m almost late, and then I fall, happily exhausted, into bed.

Sunday, September 18th

I want to lose.

1pm

I go to church service on campus with Dawson at eleven. Then we have lunch.

At lunch, Jake and Ace are organizing a game of kickball.

Katie and I stop off at our dorm to change out of our church clothes and then meet everyone down at the practice field.

Jake and Ace decide they will be captains and start choosing sides. I wasn’t really surprised that Aiden, Logan, and Nick all show up, but I am surprised when Aiden smiles at me.

Damn those smiles.

Aiden is the first person Jake picks.

Ace chooses Dawson.

Jake has to choose a girl next, so he picks me. Then he sticks out his tongue at Dawson.

Dawson grabs me around the waist and gives me a long kiss. “Don’t get mad at me when my team kicks your team’s ass.”

“Hmmm, what do I get if my team wins?”

“Me, of course,” he replies.

I flit over to our side of the field feeling happy.

Aiden snarls, “Now I want to lose. I never want to lose.”

“Why would you want to lose?”

“So you don’t get Dawson. Besides, I need you tonight.”

“Can’t. I have plans and you were a jerk yesterday.”

“I’m sorry, okay. You just make me so—never mind. I’m sorry, but I do need you. We have that French test on Tuesday. It’s a recap of everything I didn’t learn last year and I really need to do well on it. A bunch of us are going to the library after this to study. Please come.”

He is so pathetic.

Actually, so I am. I can’t stay mad at him. No matter how hard I try.

Plus, I promised Miss Praline I’d tutor him. I suppose I kinda have to help him.

I roll my eyes at him. “Fine.”

This is bullshit.

9pm

I make Annie come with me to library. I’m happy with Dawson. I don’t want to ruin it because some silly god feels like messing with me.

We actually get a lot of studying done. Aiden invited Nick, Angela, and Stewart to study too. They all have French, just at different times. We study for a couple hours and then we are all hungry so we order pizza and go to Nick’s dorm room to eat it. Then we decided we need to do more studying, and Aiden suggests we chill in the hot tub at the Rec Center. He convinces us that we can still quiz each other there.

In the hot tub, we mostly jack around instead of studying.

I decide that if they are done studying, I’m going to head out. I get out of the hot tub and grab a towel to dry myself off. I want to go hang out with Dawson before curfew.

Aiden runs up to me, grabs me around the waist, and leaps into the pool.

When we come up for air, he’s still holding me in his arms. And we have this moment. I’m so pissed at him. But we’re so close. Body to body. Face to face.

We just stare at each other for a moment. It’s like he’s trying to memorize my face with those gorgeous green eyes.

He gives me a little squeeze, then lets go of me.

 I swear, Aiden makes me melt one minute and boil the next.

I could never like him.

Annie and I are in the locker room, changing out of our swimsuits.

I check my phone and see that I have numerous texts and a couple missed calls from Dawson.

Dawson:  Hey :) I wanna see you tonight <3  (6:15pm)

Dawson:  Where are you?  (6:42 pm)

Dawson:  Why aren’t you replying? (7:14 pm)

Dawson:  I heard you were in the library with Aiden and now no one seems to know where you are. Just FYI, I’m headed up to his room. (8:22 pm)

Dawson:  This is bullshit. (9:10 pm)

Me:  Hey, sorry. What’d you want? (9:26 pm)

Dawson:  What I want is to know where you’ve been and why you haven’t replied.

Me:  I didn’t have my phone.

Dawson:  Okay. You want to tell me where you were?

Me:  Oh, yeah, sorry. I was studying in the library with Annie, Aiden, Nick and some other people for our French test. Then we ordered pizza and ate it in Nick’s room. Then we decided to finish studying in the hot tub in the rec center. Ask Annie, Nick, Stewart, Angela. They are all here. 

Dawson:  It seems like Aiden is always trying to find an excuse to spend time with you.

Me:  You’re the only one I want to spend time with. Can I come over now, make it up to you?

Dawson:  What did you do that you have to make up for?

And that text, I have to say, makes me mad. I don’t need this right now. I had a good night and made a few new friends. I’m not going to feel bad about it. I also have more homework to do.

Me:  I thought maybe I made you worry or something. Never mind. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Dawson:  No, I’m sorry. I’m being a jealous jerk. Meet me outside the dorm. We can go for a walk?

Me:  Much better <3

I meet him outside his dorm.

“So, studying in the hot tub is a good idea. We need to do that because it’s usually pretty private. We could have some fun,” Dawson tells me as we walk down toward the football stadium.

“Yeah, it was nice. Although, we didn’t do that much studying once we got there. Everyone was screwing around and talking, so I was planning on leaving, but then Aiden threw me in the pool. He can be such a jerk.”

“Why’d he do that?”

“I don’t know.”

“How did he do it?”

“Do what?”

“Throw you in the pool?”

“Uh, what do you mean?”

“I mean, did he push you in?”

“Um, no. He like picked me up and carried me screaming in.”

“He carried you?”

“Nick did it to Angela. They don’t like each other. Okay, you know what? I’m done with this conversation. I didn’t do anything wrong.”