“I have a secret to tell you,” she said.
It was 10:40 P.M. and they were back where they’d started three hours earlier, standing at her front door. “What?” asked Jack.
“I have a fifteen-year-old baby-sitter.”
“Why is that a secret?”
“She has to be home at eleven, which is exactly why I hired her.”
“What do you mean?”
“She was my excuse, in case I had second thoughts. You might say let’s go get a drink somewhere, and this made it possible for me to look you in the eye and truthfully say I had to be home by eleven.”
“Oh.”
“Don’t look so glum. Now I wish I’d hired her older sister.”
Jack smiled. “I’m glad you had a nice time. I did too.”
“We still have a few minutes on the baby-sitter clock.” She glanced at the porch swing and said, “You want to sit for a few minutes?”
“Sure.”
Jack followed her across the porch. It was a small swing, probably built for her and Nate. They were seated side by side, looking out on the lawn, the palm trees and flower beds brightened by the moonlight. A gentle breeze stirred the oak leaves, and it sounded like the ocean.
“I can’t remember the last time I was in one of these,” said Jack, putting a little oomph into his kick.
“It’s a porch swing, not the space shuttle, Jack.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
She gently patted the back of his hand, and she didn’t pull back. The soft pads of her fingertips and the smooth palm of her hand were lying on top of his. With the slow turn of his wrist, their fingers interlaced. It was a little thing, but it felt like much more.
“That’s nice,” he said.
“It is, isn’t it?”
The swing continued to rock, and they enjoyed each other’s company in silence. Finally, Jack said, “I don’t mean to talk shop-”
“Then don’t.”
“This is only part work-related. I’m actually excited about it. I’m going to Africa.”
“Why?”
“Sally’s sister lives there. I want to talk to her. But, mainly, I just want to go. I think it’ll be fun.”
“Where?”
“Côte d’Ivoire. That’s French for Ivory Coast.”
“I know. I speak a little French.”
“Great. Maybe you can teach me a few things. French is the official language there.”
“Do you speak any at all?”
“Not a word. Unless you count the lyrics to ‘Lady Marmalade,’ You know, that old Patti LaBelle song. Voulez-vous crochet avec moi?”
Kelsey laughed. Jack asked, “What’s so funny?”
“It’s coucher, not crochet. You just changed ‘Do you want to go to bed with me?’ to ‘Do you want to knit with me? ’”
They laughed together. The silence that followed was not unpleasant, like an unspoken admission that each of them was giving serious thought to what it might be like to go “knitting” with the other. Their eyes met, and Jack felt his lips move slowly toward hers.
A noise from the house startled them. They turned simultaneously, only to catch a brief glimpse of Nate’s face in the window, followed by the telling sway of vertical blinds.
“Nathan, you had better not be awake,” said Kelsey.
They could hear him giggling as he ran away. Kelsey smiled at Jack and said, “So, you actually want to date a single mom?”
He hesitated. It felt right on one level, but he still had his reservations. “We have to think about Nate.”
“You’re so good with him. I really like that.”
“He’s a great kid.”
“He is, but I’m talking about you. I’ve met several Big Brother volunteers. Seems to me, some do it because it makes them feel good about themselves, like they’re giving back and doing their civic duty. But the best ones just really like kids.”
“I’m probably in the latter group.”
“That’s what has me wondering. Where does that come from?”
“I’m not sure. My ex-wife and I never had kids, but it wasn’t because we didn’t want them.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for the question to become that personal.”
“It’s okay. I’m not one of those guys who goes around thinking I’d still be married if only we’d brought children into our failing marriage.”
“It doesn’t work. I can vouch for that.”
“I do want kids someday, though.”
She smiled and said, “Wondering what the world would be like with a Jack Junior in it?”
“Actually…aw, skip it.”
“Skip what?”
“Well, this isn’t exactly an even trade for the little secret you told me about hiring a fifteen-year-old baby-sitter, but there already is a Jack Junior, so to speak.”
“What?”
“The woman I dated before I married Cindy gave up a baby for adoption. She says he was mine. I didn’t even know about him until about a year ago.”
“She told you after you and Cindy were married?”
“Long after.”
“Wow. That’s quite an announcement. ‘Hi, I’m back, what have you been up to all these years, by the way I had your baby.’”
“It was a definite surprise.”
“Have you figured out how old the boy would be now?”
“About Nate’s age, actually.”
“Do you think you’ll ever meet him?”
“I doubt it. But if ever I do, Nate has certainly been good practice.”
She withdrew her hand. “Practice?”
Jack saw the expression on her face and said, “That’s probably not the right word.”
“No. In fact, I’d say it’s a pretty lousy word.”
“I’m sorry. All I meant was that Nate’s a typical mischievous boy who has prepared me for just about anything.”
“Which sounds a lot like practice.”
“Kelsey, come on. You know how much Nate means to me.”
She got off the swing and walked to the porch rail. Jack jumped down and went to her, but she didn’t turn around. “Hey,” he said, speaking to the back of her head. She kept looking toward the lawn, no response.
“Nate is not practice,” he said.
“Am I?”
“What?”
She turned and faced him. “Timing is so important in a relationship, don’t you think?”
“Of course.”
“Jack, be honest. How many women have you dated since your divorce?”
“I’ve been fixed up a few times.”
“So I’m the first woman you’ve really pursued?”
“Pursued?” he said, his voice with a little more edge than intended. “In all fairness, Kelsey, this was really more your idea than mine.”
“Well excuse me for putting a gun to your head.”
“You didn’t-” he stopped in mid-sentence, then brought a hand to his forehead, confused. “What just happened here? One minute we’re sitting on the porch swing holding hands, the next-I don’t know what.”
The front door opened just wide enough for the baby-sitter to stick her head out and say, “I’m really sorry, Kelsey, but if I’m not home by eleven-fifteen, my parents won’t let me sit for you anymore.”
“Don’t apologize. If Mr. Swyteck leaves now, you’ll be home in plenty of time. You ready, Jack?”
He’d agreed earlier to drop off the sitter on his way home. “I guess so.”
The girl tiptoed past them and continued down the steps. Jack looked at Kelsey and said, “Can we talk more about this, please?”
“I’ll call you.”
“When?”
“Soon.”
They were standing just a few feet apart, but neither one moved, as if it now seemed awkward that just moments earlier they’d been headed toward a good night kiss. Kelsey gave him a tight smile and said simply, “Good night, Jack.”
She went inside, and Jack waited for her to look back, catch his eye, and telegraph some sign of encouragement. It didn’t come. He turned away as the door closed, then caught up with the baby-sitter in the driveway, who was peering out impishly from beneath her bangs.
“Sorry I spoiled your moment, Mr. Swyteck.”
He scratched his head with the car key as he glanced back at Kesley’s house. “Don’t worry. About the only thing I’m sure of is that it wasn’t you who spoiled it.”