“Lost? You’re not making any sense.”
Leif didn’t answer. Instead, he spun away from her, walked out her apartment door and shut it behind him. The sound of his heavy footfalls going up the stairs, and then a few seconds later the sound of his car starting, left Jaden wondering what the hell had happened. He had given her the best orgasm of her life then up and ran off. With the hard to miss hard-on he’d sported, she’d have thought for sure Leif would have wanted to go all the way. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t wanted her. The way he had kissed and touched her weren’t the actions of a man who hadn’t been as turned on as she.
Sitting on the bed as her apartment grew darker, Jaden couldn’t figure Leif out. And right now, she had no clue if she would ever see him again. He’d left in one hell of a hurry. That didn’t exactly make a girl think he wanted to be around her.
Picking up her discarded clothes, she threw them in the hamper and then walked to the bathroom naked. She needed to have a good long drenching in a hot shower.
Wrapping the long strands of her pony tail around the scrunchie she wore to pull it back, Jaden formed it into a bun, twisting it tight enough so it would stay in place.
She turned on the water in the shower stall and waited until steam started to fill the room. Leif was an enigma. He ran hot one moment and cold the next. She’d just have to wait and see if he would drop back into her life again or stay away for good this time.
Leif sped toward Marin County and home as if the hounds of hell chased him. That had been too fucking close. He should never have gone back inside her apartment after they’d finished their meal. He should have dropped her off and left just as he’d planned.
But he’d been too weak to resist the pull Jaden had over him. Then she’d stammered at him, unsure of herself, and he hadn’t been able to stop himself from kissing her. And then his determination not to touch her shattered.
He smacked the steering wheel with the flat of his palm. Once he’d started to kiss Jaden, he hadn’t been able to stop. Her complete acceptance of him had been his downfall. One kiss had led to another, which led to him stripping her naked and feasting on her pussy until he’d made her climax.
The sound of her cries of pleasure still rang in his ears. Leif gritted his teeth as his cock jerked. He was still painfully aroused and would probably stay that way until he washed Jaden’s scent from his body. It was like his own personal aphrodisiac, keeping his cock fully engorged.
And of course doing what he’d done with Jaden had not done him any favors. Oral sex with a would-be mate only increased the mating urge. He now had to look forward to a night of sex-filled dreams. The only way to stop them was to sleep with Jaden, and he didn’t want to do that. He’d really buggered himself.
Arriving at the Protectors’ mansion, Leif parked his car in the large garage and went inside. He headed for the kitchen to grab a cold beer out of the fridge. Just as he reached the doorway that led down to the basement, Jager walked through it. He must have been working out down there, because he was bare-chested and had a small towel hung around his neck. There was a sheen of perspiration on his face as well. Just the person Leif didn’t need to run into right now.
Jager stepped in front of Leif and looked him up and down. “You aren’t looking so great.” He then sniffed the air. A large smile appeared on his face. “Well, well. Let me guess. Since you have the scent of a mortal female on you, obviously your mate, along with the scent of her passion on you, I’d say you got your taste of her but didn’t fuck her.”
Having an acute sense of smell as every werewolf had, it was no surprise to Leif that Jager had been able to pick up on all that with one sniff. It also meant Leif would have to get into a shower pretty darn quick before he ran into any of the others.
“Piss off, Jager,” he said as he brushed past him and continued on into the kitchen.
Jager followed right behind him.
“You won’t be able to fight it forever, Leif.”
He pulled out a beer, twisted off the cap and took a big swallow before he answered.
“I was able to this time.”
“Yeah, but for how long? Why torture yourself? She’s your mate. You have to be at least halfway in love with her now or she wouldn’t be yours.”
Leif scowled. Well, shit. Jager was right, but he wasn’t going to tell the other warrior that. Just spending some quality time with Jaden had him wanting her more than he had before. He wanted to know everything about her. And getting her glasses off, along with her clothes, he found she was even more attractive. If he wanted to be truthful with himself, a tiny, miniscule part of him wanted to wrap her in his arms and never let her go.
The thought of spending the rest of his years waking up with her in his bed didn’t seem as repugnant as it first had.
But how long would that last? He honestly didn’t know if he could stay true to one woman for that long of a period of time. He was only a couple of years over a thousand.
Could he spend the remaining two thousand years of his life with the same woman even if she was his destined mate? Given his past history of becoming quickly bored with his latest flame, the chances weren’t very good. He didn’t want to join his soul with a mate, and find out years later, it wasn’t something he wanted. It wouldn’t be fair to him or to his mate.
He shook his head. “I can’t, Jager. It’s not in me to be a mate.”
“If you think that way, then you’re an idiot. You’re wired just like any other male werewolf. We all long to find our mates, to love and protect them.”
“Well, I’m a living, breathing example of that not being true.”
“Leif, you’re fucked in the head. You’re going to fall just like the rest of us who have become mated. In a way, I pity you, though. Your mating urge is going to have you so strung out you won’t know whether you’re coming or going. And when you break, and I can guarantee you will, your choice will be taken from you.” With that cryptic remark, Jager turned on his heel and walked out of the kitchen.
Leif finished his beer in two large swallows and thumped the empty bottle onto the counter. He got himself a second beer before he headed upstairs to his room. Much to his dismay, he found Saskia leaning against his door as if she had been waiting for him. This night just seemed to get better and better.
She crossed her arms over her chest and gave him a knowing stare when he came even with her. “Claim your mate and be done with it, Leif.”
He scrubbed his face with his hand. “You heard what Jager and I were talking about in the kitchen.”
“Yes, but I already knew about you finding your mate before that. I saw it yesterday when you met her. I’ve just been keeping quiet about it to see what you would do.”
Leif knew exactly what Saskia meant by saying she “saw” it. She had the sight. Just like her grandmother, she saw snatches of the future. It had been Saskia’s grandmother who had the vision about the foretold one.
“Well, if you saw it, then you already know I’m fighting it.”
The corner of Saskia’s mouth lifted in a half smile. “I didn’t need to see it to know that.”
“I’m not going to claim Jaden,” he said.
“Yes, you will. Your will is weakening already. As Jager said, you smell like you were doing some fooling around with your soon-to-be mate. And if you wanted to keep yourself distanced from her, you wouldn’t be referring to her by name.”
Was everyone in his family not listening to what he wanted? He sighed. “It doesn’t matter. I won’t do it.”
Saskia pushed away from his door. Her face took on a serious mien. “If I could, I would order you to take her as your mate. But this has to be your choice. That doesn’t mean I can’t pull you off protection duties until you decide to do what your mating urge must be screaming at you to do.” When he opened his mouth to protest, she held up her hand. “Not a word. You have no say in the matter. I’m the leader of The Protectors, and I have to do what is best for the rest of us and Roxie. If you’re going to continue on with this stupidity, then I have no choice but to pull you. Soon you’ll be no good to anyone.