He stills himself inside of me as he loses the battle with his own orgasm. My legs shake and I flop down on top of him, no longer able to hold myself up. Bryan wraps his arms around my back and lazily tickles my skin.
Our lovemaking has just washed away whatever worries I had earlier about spending a few weeks apart. I now realize how silly it is to be worried about it. His heart beating against my chest is all the reassurance I need that we’ll make it work somehow.
“I can’t believe you’re married!” I squeal at the top of my lungs as Maddy and Reid walk into the private room at the quaint reception hall.
Hugging me with all of her might, she says, “I know. It’s crazy, right?”
“Yeah, kinda. But Reid is your forever,” I reassure her as we exchange a sisterly smile.
She stayed at my house last night and we shared the same bed like we did when she first moved in. It feels like a lifetime ago and in many ways it is. She shared her fears with me, but no matter how cold her feet got, she knew that the feeling was fleeting. Her and Reid were meant to be and today is a celebration of their hard-won happily ever after.
I’ve only been home for a few days and in all the wedding craziness, I haven’t had much of a chance to update Maddy on all things Bryan related. We talked about it and she’s elated that we’re back together, but it just hasn’t been the main topic of conversation.
After our little pep-talk upstairs in the suite, we line up outside of the ballroom, ready to make out entrance. Hooking my arm through Dylan’s, the best man, he pats the top of my hand. “Ready, Melanie.”
I bounce on my toes to the beat of the music playing loudly inside. “You betcha, Dylan. Let’s do this.” The DJ calls our names and we join the crowd waiting for Maddy and Reid to be announced.
The DJ’s voice booms through the music. “Now, let’s hear it for the new Mr. and Mrs. Reid Connely!” Everyone claps, cheers and whistles as my eyes fill with happy tears. I glance over at Mom standing next to me. She has tears in her eyes, too. Evan notices them and hands her a tissue. He wraps a strong arm around her shoulder and peeks at me over her head. Winking at me with a smirk on his face, I know that after Christmas another wedding will be in our near future.
Of course, Mom doesn’t know yet. That would ruin the surprise.
Later in the night, I catch a quiet moment alone at my table. Mom waves at me from the dance floor as Evan twirls her around to the lyrics of Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight”. Wistfully, I think about dancing with Bryan. I can’t wait to get back to school and to continue on our day-by-day journey.
Lost in happy thoughts, Maddy sits down next to me. “Hey, sweetie.” Maddy smiles cheerfully at me.
“Are you okay, Mel?” she asks when I don’t answer her right away. Honestly, she just caught me off guard as I was recalling images of the last time Bryan and I made love before I came home. That was a good night, indeed.
I sigh softly, wishing Bryan were here with me. “Of course I am. But let’s not talk about me. You look beautiful today, you know?” I don’t want to bring her down. So even though I know she thinks that I’m just trying to change the subject, I sway the attention back to her.
“Thanks, girl. You look pretty good yourself, Ms. Maid of Honor slash Godmother.” Maddy elbows me in the side, and I finally find the genuine smile she’s been looking for since she pulled her chair up next to mine.
“Thanks, Maddy. Why don’t you go out there and dance. I don’t want to bring you down. I just miss Bryan, that’s all.” Averting eye contact, I start picking at the corners of a napkin on the table. I don’t want to get into all of this on her night. She should be enjoying herself.
Smiling at me as she stands, Maddy says, “I know, Mel. I wish he could be here too. It’ll all work out.” I think it’ll work out too. I’m actually certain of it, but tonight I just feel off. Being surrounded by all of these couples and all of this love makes me long to be in his arms.
As if on cue, one of the only other single people here comes up behind Maddy. “Would you care to dance with me?” Dylan asks as he stretches out his hand.
Dylan used to date Reid’s brother, Shane, before he died. He hasn’t found the courage to love again. I can’t say that I understand his pain; it’s a totally different breed than mine. I just hope he can find the other half to his heart.
Standing from my chair, I place my hand in his. “I would love to, Best Man slash Godfather.” I wink at Maddy as Dylan escorts me out to the dance floor.
As Clapton’s words mix into the next slow song, Dylan and I move in circles on the floor next to Cammie and Jack who are staring dreamily into each other’s eyes. A deep male voice sings out about finding love again and Dylan laughs flippantly. “What? You don’t think you’ll find love again?” My prodding is laced with concern. Dylan deserves love, but apparently he doesn’t think so.
Shaking his head, he says in a cool, unaffected voice, “Nah, I don’t think love is in the cards for me.”
“I don’t know, Dylan. Don’t cut yourself short. You’re young, hot and pretty sweet. I know there’s someone out there for you.” I pat him on the shoulder as the song comes to an end.
He kisses my cheek sweetly. “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see, Melanie.”
As I watch him stalk off the dance floor, my heart breaks for him. I know what it feels like to think you don’t deserve love. I know that black and gnawing void of emptiness that is capable of chewing you up and spitting you out.
I just hope that Dylan can avoid it.
Just as the night is about to wrap up, I make my way over to the bar and get a diet Coke. When an arm snakes around my waist from behind, I jump out of shock.
“Hey, babe.”
Turning quickly, I’m stunned to see Bryan standing behind me. “What the hell! I thought you couldn’t make it!” I jump into his arms, squeeze him tightly and kiss him through my huge smile.
“I couldn’t, at first. But when I got home and talked to Mom about it, she insisted that I come up for at least the wedding.” He places a chaste kiss to my cheek and smiles at me proudly. He may have just won the coveted “Boyfriend of the Year” award. “She’s doing really well, better than I thought.”
“Bryan, that’s awesome. I’m so happy for her. But what about Emmie, how is she?” I’m bouncing on the tips of my toes with excitement to hear about his sister.
“Are you kidding? Once she heard I was missing a wedding, with ‘pretty princess dresses’,” he air quotes those words to make sure that I know they’re Emmie’s words and not his, “she practically shoved me out the door.”
“But all the traveling and it’s almost the holidays, and it’s just … it seems like more trouble than it’s worth. What about Christmas and then New Years? You wanted to be with your family.” The pace at which my words race out of my mouth is dizzying and I can barely catch my breath.
Bryan pulls me close to him and presses his lips up to my ear. “Yes, but I wanted to be with you, too.” Rubbing his nose up the length of mine and popping a soft kiss to my forehead, he adds, “You are never trouble and you are always worth it.” Those words cause me to melt into him and exhale a sigh of relief that he’s here with me.
“Dance with me?” he asks as the DJ announces the final song of the night.
“Always.” Lacing our fingers together, we slowly sway and move together on the dance floor.
He steps on my toes a few times and me on his. We share more than a few laughs as we both sing the wrong lyrics to each other, horribly off-key, I should add. It’s fitting, though.