She draws in a deep breath and releases it. God, I forgot how good it feels to bring that peace to someone else. I’ve missed being a team with someone and the fact it’s Paige just multiplies that elation. “Thank you. I’m sorry my life is so fucked up.”
I place my hands on her shoulders and wait for her to face me. “Never be sorry. I’m here, always.”
She bursts into my arms and I hold her tight, allowing her tears to flow freely.
“Where’s Matty?”
“He’s at my aunt’s, but I’m going to ask Chrissy to pick him up. Shit, my phone.” She pulls away and jogs across the room. “FUCK!” she screams, picking up her phone in two different pieces.
“I got it.” I dig my phone out and dial Chrissy. When she picks up, her voice is groggy and I wonder myself what time it is. “Chris?” I glance at the clock seeing it’s seven in the morning. “Can you pick up Paige’s brother, Matty?”
“What’s wrong?” The panic isn’t hard to miss in her voice.
“Don’t worry, I have it handled. Can you pick him up from Paige’s aunt’s and bring him back to the house?”
“No problem. Dex and I are free all day. We have it covered.” I hear shuffling behind her.
“Thanks.” I hold the phone to my chest.
“Paige, does she know where to go?” Her eyes shed more tears and she bites on her nails.
She only nods.
I bring the phone back up to my ear. “So, you know where to go?”
“Yeah, no worries. I’ve been there before. Her mom?” I guess I’m not the only one who knows about Paige’s mom.
“Yeah,” I answer and she sighs.
“Call me when you can. If she needs me—”
“I will, promise.”
We hang up and Paige darts directly to the door. She throws it open and sails right through. Before the heavy door can slam shut I jog over to catch it. I find her at the elevator, and I lightly grasp her elbow.
“Should we tell your dad?”
Her head flies up to my face.
“No. He’s not going to give a shit.”
Man, where did my sweet Paige go?
“He seemed like he would last night. I’m sure he’d want to help you out.”
She stops and stares right into my eyes. “Rob, my dad is the best father he can be. He pays for my education, he gives me spending money, and he loves me as much as he’s capable. But he’s starting a tour and that comes first in his life.”
I nod, remaining silent. From her stabbing and intense eyes, I’m afraid she’s about to go crazy on me.
“It’s not that my dad doesn’t love me, he does. But I’m not number one in his life. I never have been and never will be. I made peace with that a long time ago.”
The elevator dings and she steps in without another word. We ride down to the lobby and all I can think of is she should be someone’s number one. Is this her demon, the fact that she comes second to everyone in her life?
As bad as my mom was last year, I never doubted her undying love for me. I’m saddened that Paige hasn’t experienced that with anyone.
“Miss Thompson,” The guy from the front desk raises his hand, but Paige breezes by without even a glance.
“I got her, sorry to bother you.”
He nods and then watches Paige the whole time through the circular doors. Lucky for us, the parking garage is right across the street.
“Stay here, I’ll be right back.”
She doesn’t respond and I run across the street, dodging the morning traffic. I enter the parking garage and ride the elevator up to the fifth floor. Speeding down, I pay the outrageous parking fee for overnight and skid to a stop to pick up Paige.
“What hospital?” I ask once she’s secure in her seat.
“Medina County.” I side glance to her. “I know.”
We should have left my car and cabbed it over there. We’re only a few blocks. Why is she downtown? I’m positive Paige is asking the same thing, and I’m not about to grind salt into the wound.
After I park the ‘Stang in its second parking garage in two days, we go down to the help desk. Paige is polite, waiting for what room her mom is in. Her emotion has switched to indifference now. I’ve seen sadness, madness and now it’s swung to I don’t give a shit.
“Thank you.” She stomps steadily to the elevator doors, mumbling to herself. I only catch whore, bitch, shitty, mother, Matty. The rest is rambling.
I know she’s mad, but I’m not sure how to comfort her. Every time I lay my arm around her shoulders, she circles out of my hold. I went to grab her hand and she releases it after only a minute.
I’m right back to Carly, in that hospital, after the news. When she fled the room and I chased after her. Her angry eyes shedding tears. She ran into my arms and I knew we could survive this, but then she pushed me back and ran. That’s when Xavier came out and punched me square on the cheek. At that point, I knew I was in this alone and Carly would never come around. Which makes it ridiculous that I kept trying to get her to come back.
Paige though, why won’t she allow me to be here for her? I can’t deal with another Carly. I need someone who will allow me to be there for them as much as they are for me. We reach the floor and Paige scurries out of the small confines, rushing down the antiseptic-reeking hallway as her face remains pegged to the right on the room numbers.
I follow her a few steps behind since she’s made it clear she doesn’t want to be near me. She stops and spins on her heels, waiting outside the room.
Fuck it, I don’t give a shit if she wants me or not. I know all too well what it’s like to be alone when tragedy strikes and I’ll be damned if she’s going to feel abandoned like I did.
I drag her body into mine and slide us to the edge of the door. “I’m here for you.” Her head nods into my chest and her arms tighten around my stomach.
She picks up her head and I only hold her flusher against me. “Thank you. It’s foreign to me.” I kiss the top of her head and she nuzzles deeper.
Damn, her body fits with mine. The way my lips can kiss her head, her arms don’t strain to wrap around me. The fact that I’m the first person she’s trusting won’t fail her cracks open my heart and allows her to glide right in. For the first time in months, I don’t fight her occupying that space; instead I welcome her into the one part of my body I close everyone out of.
“I love you, Paige. I’ll always be here,” I whisper and a whimper muffles into my shirt.
Urging her head up, she follows and I wait to have all of her attention. “I love you, Paige and whatever happens in that room, with Matty, or your dad, doesn’t change that.” I make the promise to her, that I wish someone would have given to me seven years ago.
Her eyes pour love and adoration, but she remains speechless. I can’t help my heart from constricting until I hear her mutual feelings, but I don’t want empty words. When she tells me, I want her heart pledging it, regardless if it’s right now, an hour from now, or a month. I’ll wait for her to be ready because I know how hard it can be to tell someone. Especially when you’ve been let down and in Paige’s case, she’s never expected anything but to be let down by people.
“Thank you.” Her hand grazes down my back, until she links her fingers with mine. “Please, come in with me.” She begins ushering me toward the door. I realize this is the best promise Paige can give me. To be side by side through her hell right now.
When we break through the door, and shuffle past the curtain, Linda is lying down on her side, facing the window. Paige stops at the edge of the bed and I hold her hand tightly in mine.
“Mom?” her voice is a whisper.
Linda wiggles in her bed, but never looks over to us.
“Go away, Paige.”
Paige inhales a deep breath and I grip her hand tighter.
Don’t shut me out.
“You know I won’t.”
“Just go with your daddy,” Linda sneers and the dislike in her voice isn’t missed by either of us.