Lifting my head, I slide her legs from my shoulders and look up at her. She’s lying there with her eyes closed, panting, her chest heaving from her climax. The sight before me has me sucking in air. She literally steals the breath from my lungs. The vision of her like this will be forever ingrained in my memory. This entire experience will never leave me. It’s never been this way, tasted as good. I’ve never wanted to please someone so bad. Truth is… love changes everything.
WHAT THE HELLwas that? Keeping my eyes closed, I try to focus on breathing, deep breath in and out. I didn’t realize what I’ve been missing. I’ve only slept with a few guys, and usually it’s when one or both of us are a little intoxicated. Not too much that I don’t know what I’m doing, just enough to take the edge off, to relax long enough to complete the task and move on.
I feel Max’s fingers lightly trailing back and forth over my abdomen. I can’t bring myself to open my eyes yet and face him. My emotions are all over the place and I’m afraid he’ll be able to see right through me. I tried humor earlier and a little flirting so he wouldn’t be able to see how nervous I was. Now, now I’m afraid he’ll be able to see how much he means to me. That he’ll be able to see I’ve opened my heart to him, given him two things that I’ve not been able to do since I was seventeen. Not only does he have my heart, he has my trust. I don’t want to scare him away.
His lips graze my nipple and my eyes pop open. “Hey, pretty girl.” He softly kisses my lips. I can taste myself, and as much as I always thought that would turn me off, it doesn’t. Not after how those lips made me feel.
“Hi.” I turn my head away so he doesn’t see me blush.
Cupping my face in the palm of his hand, he turns me to face him. “Don’t hide from me, Kens. Not now.” His voice is pleading.
“I’m sorry, I just… I’m embarrassed at how I acted.” I feel the heat flood my cheeks. “I got lost there for a few minutes,” I push the words out.
The corner of his lips tilts up until he is full on grinning. “You let go with me. You have no idea how sexy you are, how sexy you were in that moment, hearing you cry out my name, writhing against me. Never apologize for enjoying our time together.” He leans down and kisses my nose. “This isn’t a one-time thing, Kens. You said you were mine, and I’m holding you to that. I want to see you come undone from what I do to you. I fucking love the fact that I’m the only one.”
“Just you,” I whisper the words, not really sure I want him to hear me. He does.
“Just us,” he says as he drops his head, bringing his mouth to my sensitive nipple. I run my fingers through his hair while he feasts on one then the other.
“Max.” I try to get his attention, but he doesn’t stop. “Maxton.” I try again. This time I tug a little on his hair.
His head rises and eyes blazing with passion are staring back at me. I’m in awe of how much this man means to me. How he snuck his way in, and now, I don’t ever want to think about what life might be without him in it. However, once he knows, he may not feel the same. He may not want to be with the “broken girl” when he can have anyone he wants. I need to seize every minute, every memory I can and lock them away for when that happens. “Make love to me.”
On trembling arms, Max places himself on top of me. I open my legs and he settles between them. Slowly, he eases his body onto mine, careful not to crush me. Then, he nestles his face in the crook of my neck. I can feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest, the quick pants of breath against my skin. I run my hands up and down his back in a soothing manner, the hard planes of his muscles under my fingertips. He’s so big, yet gentle.
We lay like this for several minutes and I’m starting to get worried. “Maxton, we don’t…” My words die in my throat as he lifts his head and locks his gaze on me.
“You’re everything I never knew I wanted. I want to stay in this moment forever. I need for you to understand what this means to me, that you’re giving me this… this gift of you. I will forever cherish you, Kens.” He wipes my cheek capturing the tear that has just fallen with his thumb.
I need him. I need him as close as possible. I lock my arms and legs around him, which brings him where I need him. Our eyes lock as he slowly pushes inside of me. “Fuck, Kensi.” He stills above me, inside of me.
“Max.” I wiggle my hips. I need him to move.
He chuckles. “What, babe?” he asks as he starts to rotate his hips. I make a noise between a sigh and a moan, really I have no idea what kind of sound it is and I don’t care. He feels so good. “You feel amazing,” he whispers in my ear, his lips traveling down my neck.
Propping himself on one elbow, his other hand travels over my body. If it’s within his reach, his hands are there, caressing, driving me crazy.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says, peppering kisses across my chest.
“Maxton, please,” I beg him. This slow onslaught that he’s doing is great, really, but I need him.
“Tell me what you need, Kensi,” he whispers against my lips.
“I need for you to fuck me.” I cry out as he thrust deep. Finally! I move my arms under his and grip his back, holding on to him. He’s relentless as he thrusts over and over. I watch as his eyes are closed tight, his breathing rough. Feeling my gaze, his eyes open and lock on mine.
He moves his hand to rub my clit. “Kensi, babe, I’m close. Are you ready?” he asks, never losing the rhythm of his hips or his thumb. “I need you to go with me, babe.”
“Yes,” I pant, “I’m there, Max.” His lips crash to mine, swallowing back my cries as we both fall over the edge of pure bliss. “I’ve never… j-j-just never been like that,” I stutter the words.
Max moves to lie beside me. He wraps his strong arms around me and holds tight. “Kensington,” he breathes.
My head is resting on his chest; the thunderous beat of his heart is right below my ear. We lay still as we both catch our breath and come down from the high we just experienced. I have no doubt he is just as affected as I am.
Kissing the top of my head, he says, “Pack a bag for tonight. I want you in my bed.”
I’m quiet while I let his words sink in. “Kens, I just want you in my space so I can hold you like this.” The rough pads of his fingers trace my spine.
“Okay,” I finally say as I move to sit up. He tightens his hold on me.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks. His voice is husky.
“To finish my shower.” He reluctantly releases me and I stand. I feel the evidence of our passion and freeze. “Shit,” I breathe.
Max is standing beside me in an instant. “What’s wrong?” His big hands are holding my face, his gaze locked with mine.
“Condom,” I croak out.
Max furrows his brow. “That’s never happened before. I’ve never forgotten. Never.” Sitting on the edge of the bed, he pulls me onto his lap. “I’m sorry, Kens. It’s my responsibility and I just… I was so lost in you that it didn’t even cross my mind.” He kisses my shoulder.
I mentally count the days in my head. “I think we’re okay,” I tell him.
With his index finger, he turns my head so he can look into my eyes. “Of course we’ll be okay. Whatever happens, we’ll figure it out. Either way, however this turns out, we’ll be fine.” His voice is a little shaky.
Trust. I nod my head that I heard him, kiss his cheek, and head for the shower.
I WATCH HER as she walks away from me. I can’t believe I forgot to suit up. That’s never happened to me. No wonder she felt so fucking incredible. I wanted to crawl inside of her and never leave. What if she’s pregnant? Holy shit, what was I thinking? Obviously, I wasn’t but… fuck! I know better. If making love to her results in a baby, then I’ll do right by her, but we are so not ready for that. I’m not ready for that. I hear the water turn on in the shower and it hits me that my girl is naked and wet in the next room… without me.