I moved in closer and held his face in my hands, wiping his tears with my thumbs. “Fate brought us here. You with your pain, me with my loneliness and heart of stone. God, I don’t want to.” I sighed, letting my head fall back and owning how I felt. “But… I still love you.”
He reached up and wrapped his hands around my wrist. The touch connected us deeper than a kiss in that moment. “I love you, too.”
I shook my head because this wasn’t what I wanted, but it was what I needed. “We need to find a way to heal—to move on.”
He took a deep breath and frowned before asking, “You won’t leave me?”
I shook my head. “No,” I said in a raspy whisper because the words were hard to admit. I cleared my throat and continued. “I don’t know how to.”
He pulled me in and held me tight, as if his arms could keep me locked to him forever.
I leaned back and met his gaze. “But we’re going to take this slowly.”
He nodded his acceptance, and I let him pull me back into his arms and let myself enjoy the feeling of being held by him again.
~*~*~
I was kidding myself thinking we could take things slowly. Xander and I have always burned hot from the first day. That heat did not evaporate when we split. If anything, distance only caused it to build into an inferno. So three restless nights later, I found myself sprawled in Xander’s bed, stripped bare in more ways than one.
“Did you fuck Matthew?” he asked while thrusting slowly into me. This had been the topic of discussion the night before, but I’d hung up without giving him an answer. It seemed he knew he’d have to resort to other means to get answers from me.
“Tell me what happened,” he insisted.
I shook my head, gasping as his cock repeatedly hit against my sweet spot. I could barely breathe between thrusts, much less speak.
“Nothing happened,” I panted.
“Tell me what the fuck happened, Avery! Tell me what you let him do.”
“Not now… please… Xander… Later.” Each word came out on a ragged breath between strokes.
His thrusts became as aggressive as his tone. He grabbed hold of my hips, lifted them, and fucked me onto his cock. “Tell me now,” he shouted.
“Nothing,” I shrieked. Why won’t he just leave it alone?
He growled, then smacked my ass. Hard. I yelped.
“Just a kiss,” I finally admitted.
“And?” He’d slowed his pace, barely moving at this point.
“I took off my bra.”
“Then?”
“He touched me and that’s it. I swear that’s all.”
He was eerily calm with sweat running down his muscular frame and a hard-edged look in his eyes.
He threw my legs over his shoulders, hunched down, and sucked my nipple into his mouth as he began to fuck me hard again. His hip fluctuations were superb, and I was on the fast track to becoming derailed.
He released my nipple with a smacking pop, then glared down at me, wrapping his hand around my neck, never missing a beat with his sexual lunges.
It was hot, and I was cresting despite the lack of air. Bolts of pleasure jolted from my core and spread across my body like a tidal wave of euphoria.
I screamed and shouted, my muscles seizing up as if he’d shocked me with his power-driven lightning strike-like thrust. Light and darkness flashed behind my eyelids, and I wasn’t sure if I’d passed out due to lack of air, or died from a heart attack-causing orgasm.
“Turn around,” he demanded from somewhere in the distance. My eyelids fluttered open, and I realized he was still hovering. It just seemed like he’d spoken from another dimension. He pulled out and flipped me over. His heavy body loomed over me, his hand sweeping my hair to the right.
“You let him touch you? It makes me sick that he touched you, but I still need this pussy… So. Fucking. Bad.”
Shit .
If I said the things coming out of his mouth didn’t make me wetter, I’d be lying. He twisted my arms behind my back and pushed into me in one long thrust. My body tightened, mouth gaped.
I inched forward, trying to escape the intensity of it all, because I knew this orgasm wouldn’t be just a physical release. This was a lesson, and at the end, no matter how savagely he took me, he’d prove unequivocally that he owned me. My shattering orgasm would be the trophy he carried around as proof of our love.
Before I squirmed too far away, he grabbed my thighs, spread them wider, pushed my upper body down so my chest was pressed against the bed, and leaned into me. “Are you trying to get away?”
I shook my head against the mattress.
“You’re always trying to get away from me. When will you realize you fucked up? You let me in, and I’m not leaving.”
I moaned as he sharply thrust his cock into me.
He put his mouth to my ear and whispered, “We fell in love, and now we have to live with this insanity.”
He reared back and pounded into me repeatedly, painful but blissful drives of his steely length banging against my G-spot relentlessly. Nagging, mocking, ridiculing me into submission, then evoking a climax out of me so strong it plundered my senses and stripped me bare.
It was the most silent orgasm I’d ever had, but that didn’t represent the severity of it. In fact, the only thing that proved the climax had ripped my soul from me and firmly placed it in Xander’s hand was the sole teardrop that spilled from my eye and onto the sheets.
Xander groaned, pulled out, and flipped me over.
“Open your mouth.” I was past trying to reason with Xander. He was crazed in his need to brand me—make me his again.
I did as he demanded, and he pushed his cock into my mouth.
“What does it taste like?” he asked. His cock was too far down my throat for me to respond. So I moaned against his hot skin.
He yanked himself out, using his hand to stroke his achingly hard cock. “Answer the question.” He twisted my hair in his free hand and forced me to look up at him.
“Me. You taste like me.”
“It’s the only thing I’ll ever taste like.” He threw his head back, his hand working aggressively on his cock.
“Fuck!” he growled.
Thick cords of cum shot out onto my face, lips, and chest. I knew he was marking me, but I was okay with it, because the mark I left on him was etched all over the pained expression on his face. His love for me was my mark, and when I took it away, it cut him deep.
I leaned forward, opened my mouth, and worked him through his orgasm. Sliding my tongue over his pulsating cock and licking up his seed. He’d opened my eyes to what I didn’t want to accept. The feelings we had toward each other were chaotic, turned us into dirty fucking lunatics. But the love… the love was irreversible.
Anything
Avery
I woke in Xander’s arms, and amazingly, he was asleep. It was a very rare occasion that I woke to find Xander asleep, but I liked it. I got to watch him unguarded—untroubled and peaceful.
His eyes slowly cracked open. He rubbed them with his fingers and looked at me like he thought I’d disappear. He smiled as he pulled me in and held me against his warm skin.
“I missed this. Missed you.” He kissed my forehead, his fingers caressing the skin at my hips.
“Missed you too.” I looked up and met his gaze. “Don’t mess this up.”
He sighed. “I’m going to fuck up, Avery. I love you so much I did anything to keep us together. I never intended to hurt you, and I won’t do it again.”