I followed her into the kitchen, watching her pull things out of the refrigerator. “Mother?”
She ignored me so I walked up behind her and grasped her wrist as she reached for another item.
“Stop, Mom.” I spun her around and pushed the refrigerator door shut. “May I ask you a question?” She looked me in the eye but didn’t respond. I met her steady gaze. “May I?”
Her shoulders sagged as she resigned to face what needed to be put out in the open. She nodded. Reluctantly.
“Were you ever going to tell me about Avery’s parents? Were you ever going to tell me I…” It was hard to even say it out loud because it became so real once the words left my mouth.
She shook her head vigorously. “I didn’t want you to find out. I didn’t want either of you to find out.”
I snorted. “So Avery’s parents were never friends of yours?” I knew, but I wanted to hear it.
She shook her head again, this time slowly. “How’d you find out? Your father had everything sealed.”
Not tight enough.
“Marcus.” My one-word answer was enough explanation for her. We both knew Marcus was very resourceful and had connections as strong as my dad’s. She nodded. “Are you going to tell me how you became part of Avery’s life?”
She sighed, then took a seat at the table, waiting for me to join her. Once I sat, she pulled my hands into hers and held them. “After that night, I kept thinking about the people in that car and who they left behind. How their lives would be changed by the tragedy.”
I tried to pull my hand back, but she held on tight. She wasn’t the only one who was haunted by thoughts of the family that had been destroyed by me. At least she’d been strong enough to actually find out more about them.
“I found out they had a little girl, and when I was told she was going into foster care… I just wanted to make sure she’d be okay. So I visited her, made up the family friend thing as an excuse to check up on her every now and then.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
She frowned. “You were destroyed by the whole thing. I couldn’t put that kind of guilt on your back. You wouldn’t even come home anymore. How was I supposed to tell you that you’d left a little girl orphaned?”
“You don’t think I deserved that guilt?” I shook my head and yanked my hand away. “I deserved more than that. I should’ve taken responsibility for the whole thing.”
“No, it was an accident.” She squeezed my hand, trying to get me to look her in the eyes,but I couldn’t. “You were angry and hurt. You weren’t thinking clearly, Xander.”
“You and Dad kept telling yourself it was an accident so you didn’t have to deal with how fucked up I am.” I stood, ran a hand through my hair,and looked down at her.“I never meant for anyone to die, but it wasn’t an accident because I was irresponsible. I was high, I was drunk, and I was angry.” I mashed a finger against my chest with each of those facts.
I pressed my palms against the table and leaned in so she could look into my eyes and see who I really was. Not just what she wanted to see, but what she tried to conceal so others wouldn’t see. “It was a toxic mix that sent me spiraling, and everyone paid for my mistake but me.”
“No, Xander.” She stood and cupped my face. “Don’t you see you’ve paid? No matter how much your name would’ve been dragged through the mud or how much time you would’ve spent in jail, it would never be as damaging as the pain you carry in here.” She tapped her finger over my heart.
“It’s been twelve years and you still carry around that hurt. You can’t sleep, you’ve tried to erase it through drinking and women—and yes, I know about the women.” She raised an eyebrow because obviously my dad or Ian had told her about the string of women who passed through my life.
Her hand swept across my face. “And now you’re in love with Avery… and this may take that away from you. So don’t tell me you haven’t paid.” She blinked, an unsettling look crossing her soft features. “Does she know?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know how to tell her.”
She dropped her hands away from my face and sat back down in a heavy heap. “I can’t tell you what to do. I’m guilty of lying to her too, and… she’s such a special girl—I mean woman—but to me she’ll always be that little redheaded, strong-spirited girl who pretended she wasn’t broken by what happened.”
I sat down and squeezed her hand. “Thank you for being there for her, Mom. For trying to fix the mess I made.”
“We all made a mess out of things, and maybe it’s time we fixed it. If you decide to come clean to her, I’ll be there for you no matter what happens.” She leaned in closer and smiled sadly. “I see the way she looks at you. She loves you, Xander. You have to believe it’s going to be enough to get you two through this.”
I nodded because the words sounded great in theory, but I still couldn’t see this ending happily if the truth came out.
Turnabout is Fair Play
Avery
My hands were behind my back, my legs spread, Xander’s right hand over my mouth and his other in between my legs. I was sitting on his lap, my back to his chest, his hard cock nestled in the ridge of my ass. Occasionally, he’d bite my neck as his heavy breaths caressed my ear.
This was supposed to be a session. Our sessions had gotten more emotional over the weeks, but before he’d pour out his emotions, he needed to drain the physical need that always clawed at us.
I whimpered against his hand.
“Shut up or Angela will hear you. Do you want that?” His tone was blunt, his voice raspy at my ear.
I shook my head, but how was I supposed to keep quiet when his fingers were driving into me, slithering along my clit, then gliding back into my wet pussy. The man was sinfully amazing. He was fully clothed but had managed to get me to strip down to my garters and heels, on the verge of begging him to fuck me.
He’d spread my legs as far as I could possibly get them. He was taunting me. Ever since the day I’d sucked him off in my office and made him lose control, he’d waited for this moment. He had a leash on me. It wasn’t your typical kind either. His leash came in the form of magic fingers and a glorious cock that compelled me to follow his orders to a tee. His finger manipulations became faster, pushing against my sweet spot, then rubbing against my clit. It was just enough pleasure to keep me on the edge, and he’d kept me there for almost half an hour.
If he wasn’t careful, my next appointment would walk in and he’d still be working me with his phenomenal digits. “Pleeease…” I gasped through the hand he held over my mouth.
“Do you understand how this works?” His voice was unreasonably calm while I was riding in limbo, tasting little morsels of pleasure, but not allowed to indulge on the feast I was promised. I nodded. Anything to get him to release my orgasm from his ruthless grasp.
“My pussy. I decide when you come,” he informed me.
“Your dick is mine—I should… get to decide.” He withdrew his fingers and smacked my pussy for my comeback answer.
Holy fuck!
The sting buzzed against my clit. I swear I almost came from that tap. One more and I was sure to go over. Maybe I can goad him into repeating it.
“That’s not how it works. I decide when we both come,” he growled.
“When do I get to decide?” I countered.
He plunged two fingers deep into my pussy and I quivered. “When I tell you to ride my dick and make me come. Now…you have sixty seconds to come, and don’t disappoint me.”