He smiled. ‘Yes, I am aware.’
‘What are you burning?’
‘Just a few old documents. Records of my past. I suppose I have their contents by heart well enough.’ He stirred the pages with a poker. The school magazine was slow to burn. He watched it blacken.
There was a long silence, in which she stared at the Aga with him.
‘Your heart can’t be very easy at present.’ Another silence. ‘I wish there was something I could do.’
She took her coat off and laid it over the back of a chair. Her neat and modest figure was shown at its best by her green cotton dress.
‘I am very grateful for what you are doing.’
‘I suppose I meant more personally.’
As the kettle boiled and switched itself off, he said, ‘You could pray for me.’
Matilda frowned. ‘There’s no need for you to be ironical.’
‘I wasn’t.’
Filling the teapot, she said with a sigh, ‘I suppose it’s my sheltered up-bringing, what else, but human relationships — I do find them difficult to handle.’
He laughed dryly. ‘We all do. It’s believed that the human race was once endogamous. Ever since exogamy set in, everyone’s found relationships a bit sort of difficult. Fascinating, of course, but difficult to handle, as you say.’
Accepting the cup she offered, he walked round the other side of the table and took a chair. They sat facing each other. As they sipped, the paper in the stove turned to ashes.
‘Would you care for a biscuit?’
‘No, thanks.’
‘You’re not — are you going to sleep here alone this weekend, Tom?’
‘I must get back to Blakeney before dark.’
‘There’s a whole hour and more of this lovely twilight before it’s dark. And it was Full Moon last night.’
The kitchen was filling with dusk already, making of her face a pale blur. He felt her personality, tender and sensible, radiating across the scrubbed table towards him.
‘I’m glad of the tea,’ he said. ‘And I’m glad you came. But I’ve got to be going.’
‘Let me know the next time you’re coming up. I’m always at home.’
She drew the one open shutter into place, and the kitchen faded into darkness.
12. Tribal Customs
Near Ascot, and not far from the famous racecourse, lies the area of Hazeldene, a developer’s paradise of the thirties. It remains far enough from London by road and near enough to it by train to serve as a refuge for the semi-rich. Half-timbered leather-work shops abound and, on Saturday afternoon when the Jags are parked in front of their mansions, children and adults appear on well-groomed horses, to canter through stretches of bracken which have somehow survived among the desirable residences. Here Tom Squire’s old friend and publisher, Ron Broadwell, had his home.
It was the last day of the year, cold and windy, and the weeping silver birches tossed behind neat beech hedges. At seven in the evening, it had already been dark for two hours.
As Squire drove towards the Broadwell house, he recited a poem aloud:
He had once been able to recite the whole poem; now parts were gone from memory. He had recited it long ago to a Serbian girl called Roša — who had laughed heartily — as they stood on the steps of the Avala memorial outside Belgrade, one midnight, drunk. He smiled at the recollection. When Squire was at Cambridge, Donne and Eliot had been the fashionable poets, and he had never lost his love of them. There were no poets like them.
The Broadwell mansion, ‘Felbrigg’, was visible from the road, sprawling tentatively behind its paddock and a white ranch fence. A tarmac drive with real old-fashioned street- lamps burning at each end led to the house. Lights blazed in the windows. As he drove up, he caught the twinkle of lanterns on a Christmas tree; it held promise of a pleasant evening ahead.
Both Ron and his wife Belinda came to the door to greet him. Ron was a large solid man with a cheerful florid face, a crop of shaggy dark hair tinged with white, and a predeliction for the good things of life. He appeared with a big cigar in his mouth. Belinda was a tall lady running unhurriedly to fat, a smiling woman with a miller’s face who, despite many years of marriage to Ron, still spoke with a slight Virginian accent. She wore a long black velvet gown with the air of one humorously aware she was doing something typical of her.
Belinda had previously been married to Ron’s partner in the publishing house of Webb Broadwell, but that marriage had lasted no more than a year. ‘Webb was great stuff as a publisher,’ she confided to Squire once. ‘But not so damned hot when it came to handling a shy virginal wife. I guess he performed better between bawds.’
They greeted Squire heartily, as he handed over to Belinda’s safe-keeping an enormous box of Swiss chocolates. In the large bright hall, the Christmas tree glittered. Ron’s dogs barked excitedly in a distant part of the house. The air was spiced with the flavour of good things.
Squire gave Belinda a big kiss. ‘Mmm, good old Virginny — I feel better already.’
‘Very pleased you could make it,’ Broadwell said, hanging up Squire’s coat. ‘All the Broadwell tribe cleared off the day after Boxing Day, having eaten us out of house and home. So this evening we have plenty of room for the Squire tribe. Teresa phoned me from Malta this morning, and she hopes to join us about nine.’
‘Fine. At least there’s no fog to delay flights.’ They stood in the hall, smiling at each other.
‘Teresa said Malta was pleasant,’ Belinda said. ‘We hope that you and she will get things together again this evening, Tom. If she can enjoy Malta, she can put up with you.’
‘New Year’s Eve — ideal time for New Year resolutions,’ Ron said. ‘I’ll get her to one side and tell her about all the royalties you’re going to earn.’
‘Forgive our tribal customs. It’s kind of you to put up with us and act as neutral ground.’
‘Oh, we’re not all that neutral,’ Belinda said.
‘Come on,’ Ron said, ushering Squire into the living room. ‘We can get in two good hours’ drinking before Teresa arrives.’
‘Don’t overdo the booze,’ his wife cautioned, adding to Squire, ‘Keep your eye on Ron. The doctor told him to cut down on those cigars, and on the whisky.’
‘I’m as fit as a fiddle, lass. Played a round of golf this morning, didn’t I?’
‘Just behave yourself, that’s all I ask. Tom, we have a couple of house guests, and I believe you already know each other. Come say hello.’
In the fireplace, a cheerful log fire burned. To one side of the fireplace sat a woman, painting. She was a petite dark-haired lady in her forties, neat, plump, magnificently groomed and manicured, with a gold ribbon in the back of her coiled hair. She wore a biscuit-coloured terylene lounging suit and amber rings on her fingers. She was painting a very small picture on a small sketching block, using acrylics from a tiny palette lying by her right hand. She used a brush as delicate as a grass snake’s tongue. As Squire entered the room, she smiled resignedly at her work and laid aside the sketchpad.
Her husband, sprawling opposite her on a chesterfield, was totally immersed in a newly published Webb Broadwell coffee-table book, entitled The Sower of the Systems, a collection of apocalyptic paintings through the ages, by Leslie Lippard-Milne. He wore a crumpled brown suit, with brown-and-yellow striped socks showing between trousers and slippers. Squire knew the couple well. The man was the editor of Intergraphic Studies, Jacques d’Exiteuil, whom Squire had last seen, with his wife Séverine, only a few months earlier in Paris.