“Are you done running yet, Sophie?”
“Who said I’m running?” He takes a step closer, and I counter with a step back. We keep this up until I’m trapped against his closet door.
He runs his knuckle down my cheek. “You’re always running. Please stop fighting us, Sophie.” Picking me up around my waist, he deposits me on his bed—never breaking eye contact. “I want you so fucking bad. I can’t get you out of my head.”
“What about Emily?”
“She’s not you, Sophie. You’re the one I want. I never should have kissed her and I’m sorry I did, especially in front of you. You didn’t deserve to see that no matter how mad I was.”
Yes. I want him too. We’re grasping at each other’s shirts, lost in the moment. His kisses taste like shots of whiskey mixed with the cinnamon from his gum. It’s all man. Reluctantly, I pull my mouth away from his. “I’m sorry, too, Kipton. I kissed him.”
“I’ll break his lips later, just kiss me, beautiful.” His name tumbles out of my mouth over and over as I moan against his lips. He sucks on my neck sending shockwaves pulsating throughout my body. His shirt is off before I have time to even ask him to remove it. Running my needy hands over his naked back, there’s a knock on the door.
“Kipton, are you in there?” It’s Emily.
Quickly, I pull my shirt down to cover my boobs and adjust my skirt. I use the ponytail holder around my wrist to fix my sexed up hair. It’s knotted up from Kipton’s fingers mixed with the sweat from dancing. “I should go.”
“No. Stay. I’ll tell her to leave.”
“I got carried away, I’m sorry.” I catch my breath and move towards the door.
“Let me guess, this was a mistake.”
Not again. Spinning around, I shout at him with every ounce of anger built up inside me. “Will you stop fucking saying that,” I cry. “I’m not a mistake,” tumbles from my lips barely above a whisper.
“I know you’re not, Sophie.”
Needing air, I pull open the door and come face-to-face with Emily. If looks could kill, I’d be dead. “Why are you in here? Where is he?” she asks.
I don’t bother acknowledging her presence as I step around her and into the hallway.
“Did you just sleep with that girl?” Emily questions.
“Not tonight, but I have. And her name’s Sophie.”
She glances at me before kicking the door shut in my face. I flinch as it slams before sinking to the hardwood floor. Resting my head in my hands, I blew it—again. The thought of him being alone with her makes me queasy. Desperately, I want to run back into his room, begging him not to touch her. Instead I envision him naked, thrusting inside her. It sends me over the edge.
Hurrying into the bathroom, I splash cold water on my face. Still lightheaded, it’s not enough to erase the pain. And although I haven’t eaten anything since the last time, I make myself throw up. Desperately needing to right a wrong—both of our wrongs, I gag painfully. With nothing to expel, all that’s in the toilet is some bile mixed with blood. More blood.
Sobbing, I cry for not being strong enough to fight for the guy I want, and for being stupid enough to believe I was capable of having a real relationship. I warned him I was too fucked up—too broken by my past. But he wouldn’t listen. Instead, he kept pushing for more even after I assured him I wasn’t capable of anything even close. He made me need him and now that I do, it’s too late.
My phone vibrates with an incoming text.
Cara: You okay?
Sophie: No. In the bathroom upstairs.
Cara: On my way.
Knowing I need to get my shit together before Cara sees me, I rummage through the cabinets until I locate some mouth wash. Gargling, I spit it out as the burn of the alcohol on my already angry mouth stings terribly. The room tilts sideways before it spins. I sit down on the small rug in front of the shower to get my bearings. I hear Cara knock on the door, but I can’t get up to let her in.
It’s not locked so she opens it herself and rushes to my side. “Sophie, are you okay?”
“Dizzy. I’m okay.”
“Let me help you up.” She takes my hand and pulls me to a standing position. I’m weary, swaying back and forth slightly.
“I want to go home, Cara.”
“Okay. Can you walk?”
“I’m not sure.” There’s no way I can walk the entire way back to the dorm.
“Hang on. I’ll get Kipton’s keys. I only had half a beer. I’m fine to drive.”
“No! Don’t bother him. He’s probably busy.”
Laughing at me, she says, “he has it coming.” She doesn’t bother knocking, instead she tries the knob. When she finds it locked, she kicks the door repeatedly with her boot until Kipton answers the obnoxious banging. It doesn’t do any favors for my already throbbing head.
“What the hell are you doing, Cara?”
Peeking through the space between the bathroom door and the door frame, I’m able to see Kipton. Although his shirt’s still off, his pants are on. Sighing in relief and holding onto a sliver of hope, I duck my head, tears leaking from my eyes. I did this to myself. I pushed him to her.
Cara scoffs at him and gets right to the point. “Give me your keys; I need to drive Sophie home. And put your shirt back on.”
“What? Why?”
“Because you’re not a man whore.” She spins on her heel, but he grabs her shoulder before she gets away.
“No. Why do you need my keys?”
“She’s not feeling well.”
“Again? Where is she?” he questions.
“Give me your damn keys, please.”
Kipton’s about to hand them over to her, but pauses. “Are you okay to drive? Were you drinking?”
“I’m fine. Only had half a beer,” she assures him. She grabs the keys from his hand and rushes back to me. “Okay, Sophie. We can go. Let me help you back up.”
My heart is racing, but it’s not from the site of Kipton. “Cara, my chest.” Before I hear her response, I’m reaching out to grab the sink. I can see Kipton’s silhouette in the doorway, watching me closely. “It’s tight and pounding.”
“Sophie, what’s wrong?” he asks.
“I need to go home.” My chest is so tight. I clutch at my throat, rubbing my skin.
“Kipton, baby. Come back to bed,” Emily purrs. She’s wearing his shirt and nothing else. The site alone makes me want to gag all over again. She looks exactly like one of my dad’s trashy sluts.
Kipton does a double take of her and looks livid. “Where are your clothes, Emily? It’s time for you to leave.”
I stare in horror between the two of them. Kipton stands in front of me, forcing me to look at him. “This isn’t at all what it looks like, beautiful. I didn’t—I wouldn’t.”
I need to get away from Emily before I scratch her eyes out. Bracing myself against the wall, I use it for support as I walk down the hallway. With Cara’s help, I’m able to make it to the kitchen. But before I can get outside to the car, Kipton’s by my side.
“You know me, Sophie. I’m not that guy anymore. You’re what I want. Not Emily or anyone else.”
I swallow around the lump in my throat. It would be so easy to believe him. But the truth is, I’m not sure I do. “Goodnight,” I whisper. With my heart in pieces, I walk to the car where Cara’s waiting to take me home.
“You okay?” Cara asks on the drive to the dorm.
That’s a loaded question. “I will be.”
Back in the dorm, Cara makes sure I’m safely tucked in my bed before she excuses herself to see Drew. “I’ll be right back. I just want to make sure he knows what’s up in case Emily or Kipton come back here. I doubt she would have the guts to, but you never know with my brother.”
“Take your time, I’m okay.” I toss around to get comfortable, hoping to fall asleep so Cara doesn’t feel obligated to babysit me, but my phone rings.