The car drove them home, and the apartment was quiet when they got there. Carmen had picked Annabelle up at school, and taken her straight to ballet. Alex wanted to settle in before she got home, and change into a dressing gown, but she was amazed at how exhausted she was by the time she got there. She was drained by all her emotions. And it depressed Sam to see her change into her nightgown. She had her back to him, and she put her dressing gown on before she turned around, so all he saw was pink satin when she turned to face him.
“Why don't you stay dressed? It might worry Annabelle to see you in your nightgown.”
“I'm really tired. I thought I'd lie down.”
“You can lie down in your dress,” he reproached her. He thought she was playing invalid again, and she knew it. But he didn't know how tired she was, or how worn out, or how afraid of seeing their little girl and what she would say. It was all very upsetting and desperately scary. And as she lay on their bed and turned on the TV, she saw Sam put his coat on. He had brought her the lunch that Carmen had left for them and now suddenly, he was disappearing.
“Where are you going?” She was afraid to be alone. She was suddenly afraid of everything, and she was sorry she had come home, but eventually she had to.
“I'm going back to the office,” he explained. “I'll try and come home early this afternoon. I've got a meeting with Larry and Tom I just couldn't cancel. Call me if you need me.” She nodded and he blew her a kiss, but she noticed that he didn't come near her. He hadn't kissed her properly since her surgery, and she wondered how long it would be before he would come near her again.
The last thing she wanted to do was pressure him, but she felt so lonely while he kept his distance.
Alex lay quietly on their bed for a long time, waiting for Annabelle to come home, thinking about what to say to her. She thought of many things, but the moment she saw her, everything she'd planned to say to her was suddenly forgotten. All she could think of was how adorable she was, how much she loved her, and how much she had missed her.
Annabelle gave a huge squeal when she saw Alex standing there, waiting for her, in the doorway to her bedroom. Alex had heard the elevator, and then Carmen's key in the front door, and her whole body was shaking as she waited.
“Mommy!” she screamed, and then hurled herself into Alex's arms, as Alex tried to protect herself from the blow, but she couldn't. She winced painfully, and Carmen saw it. But Annabelle only saw that her mother was home, and she was quick to step back and look up at her impishly.
“What did you bring me from your trip?”
Suddenly Alex realized that she had completely forgotten, as Annabelle's face fell. “You know what? They didn't have anything good at all, not even at the airport. I think maybe you and I will have to go to F.A.O. Schwarz next week, and see what we can find there. How does that sound?”
“Wow!” Annabelle clapped her hands, instantly forgetting her disappointment. She loved going to F.A.O. Schwarz with her mother. And then she looked surprised when she saw Alex was in her nightgown.
“Why are you in your nightie?” she questioned her suspiciously just as Sam had said she would. In many ways, she was a lot like Alex. She saw everything, and wanted to know why things happened.
“I was taking a nap before you came home, and I had kind of a little accident in Chicago.”
“You did?” Annabelle looked impressed, and then very worried. “Did you get hurt?” She looked as though she was about to cry, and Alex quickly kissed her to reassure her.
“Kind of.” She was still working on her story.
“Did you get a Band-Aid?” Alex nodded. “Can I see it?” She opened her dressing gown with trembling hands, and Carmen gasped when she saw the enormous dressing. She knew instantly that something terrible had happened, and her eyes flew to those of her employer. “Does it hurt?” Annabelle asked, still fascinated by the size and location of her bandage.
“A little bit,” Alex said honestly, “we have to be a little bit careful we don't bump it.”
“Did you cry?” She nodded, and instinctively looked up at Carmen, whose eyes filled with tears when she saw her. She reached out and gently touched Alex's arm, and the gesture touched Alex deeply. Annabelle ran to her room then to get her doll, and Carmen scolded her.
“Why didn't you tell me, Mrs. Parker? Are you okay?”
“I will be,” she said flatly. It was clearly her breast, but Carmen still didn't know the full extent of the damage, although she had already guessed it from the shape of Alex's profile.
Annabelle came bounding back into the room, carrying three dolls and a book, and she was full of tales from ballet and school, and she had made a drawing for her, and could hardly wait for Halloween. There was going to be a parade at school, and Katie Lowenstein was giving a party. She had a thousand news items to share, and Alex suddenly wondered how she had survived five whole days without her. Just seeing her brought her back to life, and gave her something to fight for.
“Are you all right, Mrs. Parker?” Carmen asked her repeatedly while the two played on Alex's bed, and she brought her a cup of tea and a chicken sandwich, and urged her to eat it. And although she wasn't hungry, she remembered Liz's words about building up her strength, and she forced herself to eat it. Liz called that afternoon, to see how she was doing at home, and she was happy to hear Alex sounding so much better. Annabelle had improved her spirits immeasurably, but later, when she took off her dressing gown because she was warm, she noticed that Annabelle shied away from her a little bit. The dressing scared her. Quietly, Alex put her dressing gown back on and reminded herself not to let Annabelle see the bandage more than she had to. In some ways, Sam was right. She didn't have to make it their problem, and she didn't intend to. She needed their love and their support, but the one thing she didn't want was their pity, or to scare them. In some ways, Sam was just as skittish as their daughter.
Late that afternoon, Carmen came to take Annabelle for her bath, and she asked to bathe with her mother instead, in the marble tub, with her Mommy's fancy bubbles.
“You can take a bath in my tub, sweetheart, with my bubbles. But I can't get my big Band-Aid wet till next week.” In the hospital, they had been putting a big garbage bag over it when she took a shower. “You go ahead and take a bath without me. Okay?” Annabelle agreed, as Alex glanced at the clock. It was five, and she had thought that Sam said he would come home early. But Alex knew Friday afternoons were always long for him. It was always hard, wrapping up all the loose ends before the weekend.
As it turned out, Sam was at his office taking care of the details of his latest deal, but he was also stalling.
“Still hard at work?” Daphne asked casually as she glanced into his office at five-fifteen. She was just leaving for the weekend herself. She and Simon were going to Vermont with friends from England. Everyone had told them about the remarkable turning of the leaves, and Daphne had insisted she wanted to see it.
“It's beautiful,” Sam confirmed, wishing he were going with her. He ran a hand through his hair, and looked somewhat grim. He knew it was time to go home, but he'd been dreading it. The tension with Alex was palpable, and even Annabelle wouldn't ease it.
“What about you? Are you doing something fun?” she asked, hating to leave him. He looked so sad and so alone, as though he had no place to go, and didn't want to leave the office.
“Not really. My wife just came home from the hospital. I think we'll be taking it pretty easy.”
“I'm sorry, Sam,” she said softly, as their eyes met dangerously again and he smiled gently.
“Thanks, Daphne. Have fun. I'll see you on Monday.” She nodded, wanting to walk across the room and put her arms around him, but he looked so serious she didn't dare. Instead, she just watched him for a moment, and then blew him a kiss and left the room, wishing she could spend the weekend with him and not Simon and their friends from England.