I am changing the subject now, said Molly.
Before hitting happens. I remember there being swans on this lake. Or did someone get bored with them, too?
No, I said. Whatever happened to the swans, it wasn t us. Come on. Let s go take a look at the waterfall.
An artificial waterfall?
Of course! It was all the fashion.
Words fail me.
Don t worry, I said. I m sure you ll get over it.
I walked her down the side of the lake to the jagged stone cliff that towered over the farthest end, where heavy flowing waters cascaded down the craggy surface with endless noise and fury. A gentle mist of water drops gave a hazy, mystical look to the waterfall, and slow steady tides pulsed out from the water s impact, pushing across the lake s surface. There was even a dainty little cave cut into the cliff face, tucked away behind the tumbling waters. Very popular with courting couples. Nothing like a dark womblike setting to loosen clothes and dissolve inhibitions. Molly looked over the waterfall coolly.
Your family built a whole cliff face here, out in the middle of the grounds, just so you could drive a waterfall over it?
Yes, I said. You didn t think views like this just happened, did you? Does look rather fine, doesn t it?
Where does the water come from?
The lake, I said. We recycle it, through a M bius loop, so the water just goes round and round forever. This whole thing, the lake and the cliff and the waterfall, are what used to be called a folly back in Queen Victoria s time. They were great ones for re-creating all the grandeur of nature in their own back gardens, so they wouldn t have to travel to see them.
And you Droods had to have a lake and a waterfall, because you were no one if you didn t?
Exactly!
But these are private grounds! said Molly, just a bit loudly. No one else is allowed in! Only your family would ever get to see them! No one else would ever know you didn t have them!
We d know, I said. Don t get so overexcited, Molly. You know it s bad for your blood pressure.
Sometimes your family makes no sense at all, said Molly.
I know! I said. Why do you think I left home the first chance I got and ran away to London?
Because you ve always had a problem with authority figures, said Molly. Even when you were one.
Well, yes. That, too, I said. But mostly because my family could provoke the Dalai Lama into a kickboxing duel while drinking gin straight from the bottle.
Why are we here, Eddie? You didn t walk me all this way across the grounds just to admire the artificial scenery.
We re here because there s an undine in the waterfall, I said grandly. No one else has got an undine in their waterfall. She s been here for ages; keeps herself to herself, mostly. But whatever happened here, she must have seen it. Hell, she s got the best view of the Hall and most of the grounds. We know what must have happened, but there are still far too many unanswered questions for my liking. Like: Where s all the wildlife that should still be running round the place?
You ve always had a soft spot for animals, said Molly. Anything soft and cuddly turns up, and your heart just melts.
I looked at her and started to say something, and she raised a hand to stop me.
Do not even go there, Eddie. Talk to your waterfall.
I grinned briefly, stepped forward and called out just a bit self-consciously to the rushing waters. There was no response. I hadn t expected it would be that easy, but you have to try. The undine hadn t been on a talking basis with anyone in my family for generations. Except for Jacob and she only talked to him because he was dead. I said as much to Molly.
If she s so mad at your family, why is she still here? said Molly, getting right to the heart of the matter, as always.
Good question, I said. The undine is another of the Drood family s many little secrets. Rumour has it, she was once married to one of us. Always a bad idea when mortal loves immortal, when nature loves supernature Bound to end in tears. They say love doesn t last, but sometimes love really is forever. After he died, the undine stayed on here because there was nowhere else she wanted to go.
I take it there are other versions, other stories, said Molly.
Oh, like you wouldn t believe, I said.
Some of them quite appallingly nasty and violent. I prefer to stick with the love story because
Because you re a soppy old romantic?
Yes, but also because it enables me to forget all the other unpleasant stories and try to talk to the undine without filling my trousers.
I tried again, calling out at the top of my voice, but the waters just kept falling and the undine did not appear. Molly started to get angry.
I m not having her ignore you like this! You stand back and let me work on her, Eddie. I ll get her out. I am the wild witch of the woods, after all, and all the elements are mine to command. And I could do with a good stretch of my powers.
She struck her usual impressive witchy pose and then undermined it just a bit by dropping me a swift wink. She ran through a quick series of slashing hand and arm gestures while chanting something in debased Celtic. The waterfall poured down the craggy cliff face entirely unmoved and then slowed and stopped. And then rose slowly upwards, reversing its path.
There was still no response from the undine. Molly glared at the reverse waterfall, rolled up her sleeves and ran through a whole new series of gestures, throwing in half a dozen really unpleasant Words. The waterfall stopped again and resumed its normal downward path. But even as the waters thundered down the cliff face, they were already starting to steam, becoming boiling hot. The gentle haze at the foot of the fall disappeared, replaced with thick clouds of scalding steam. I backed away a few steps. Molly didn t.
Still no sign of the undine.
Dark brooding thunderclouds appeared out of nowhere in the pleasant summer sky. A shadow fell across the great lake and nowhere else. Thunder roared and lightning stabbed down. Great gusting winds moved across the surface of the waters, raising massive waves that slammed back and forth, sending blasts of disturbed water splashing high over the sides of the lake. And still the undine wouldn t answer.
Molly was breathing harshly now and not just from the effort of so much hard conjuring. She kicked off her boots so she could dig her bare feet deep into the grassy lawn. Molly had a lot to say about being one with nature, but that usually meant nature doing what it was told, where Molly was concerned. She shot me a dark look, flicking her dark hair out of her sweaty face.
Give me a minute. I m just getting started. I m damned if I m being ignored by a bloody jumped-up water elemental. Soon as I get my breath back, I ll call up something so impressive and unnerving it ll blast all the water out of this lake, crush the whole cliff face into rubble and tie the waterfall in a knot!
Let me try something else first, I said, soothingly. Just while you get your breath back. I walked up to the water s edge and addressed the steaming waterfall politely.
Hello. Sorry about all that. Look. I m Eddie Drood. I really do need your help. Please talk to me.
The waterfall seemed to pause, halting itself in midfall while it considered the matter, and then slowly the undine appeared, forming herself out of the falling waters themselves. The whole waterfall bulged out here and there, taking on a human shape some thirty feet tall. She stood before the cliff face, looking down at Molly and me, towering over us. A force of nature made woman by an act of will. I made a point of standing as tall as I could while still remaining respectful, just to show I wasn t in any way intimidated. Molly stuck both hands on her hips and glared right up at the undine. I don t think Molly s ever been intimidated by anything in her entire life. The undine was now a huge naked female shape composed entirely of water, and oddly proportioned. As though the human shape was something she only vaguely remembered. Her face was a smooth blur, more an impression of human features than anything fixed. And when she finally spoke, her voice sounded like gurgling waters.